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brenrae

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Posts: 4,647
 #1 
To Harry,
 
May, 2000 - June 7,2012
 
 Harry, I miss having you here beside me. You were a big part of our lives for 12 years. When you had a bladder infection, I thought you would only be at the vet's office for a few days, but it turned into weeks. I missed having you here with me, and I miss having you now. You never got better, and when they could no longer express your bladder, we had to let you go. I think about you every day, and all the things you would do. I miss you laying at me feet, and laying on the couch beside me. I miss having you sleep with me. I have no one that I can cuddle with anymore. You kept me from being lonely, because I always knew you were there, Now your not. I wish that you had gotten better so that you could come home to us, but God had other plans for you. One day I will see you again, until then, you will always be in my memories, and in my heart. I love you boy, and I hope you are enjoying yourself where you are now. Until we meet again, here is some hugs and kisses  for you. Did you find Baby Kitty? Do you do your perimeter checks? Are you keeping the other cats in line? I will see you again someday. You are not forgotten. Love you Har har. 
Billysmum

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Posts: 25
 #2 
What a lovely letter to Harry.  I have been trying to compose a 'love letter' to my Billy too who I also lost - in May.

I can see how much Harry meant to you, how much comfort he gave you and how much of a hole his passing has left in your life. 

I am sure Billy and Harry have met and are already good friends at the Rainbow Bridge.  Harry will be free of pain there as he waits for you.

Lots of love,
Billy's Mum :)


brenrae

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 #3 
Thank you, billysmum. It is not the same without your beloved furbaby around. i just wrote what I was feeling at the time, and I still feel that way. They are probably up there having all kinds of fun as they wait for us to join them. Harry is probably pouncing the other cats, because he loved to do that.
brenrae

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Posts: 4,647
 #4 
Harry,

On Thursday we brought home another cat. A female named gabby. I am not sure yet how I feel about her, but I know that you can never be replaced in my heart. You were one of a kind, such a special boy. I am thankful for the years we had together, and would of liked to have had more, but it was not in God's plan. I hope that you are happy where you are, and you are enjoying yourself until the time that I can be with you again. You will be forever in my heart. Love to you my special boy, and hugs and kisses until we meet again. You will never be forgotten. 
brenrae

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Posts: 4,647
 #5 
Harry,

 It has now been 5 weeks since you have been gone from this world. * weeks since you haven't been with us at home. I never though that a little thing like a bladder infection/blockage would take you from us. I don't know why your bladder stopped contracting to let the urine out, when it had been working until the catheter was used. Maybe it was because it was never completely empty at any time since you got sick. I wish ther was more that could of been done to help you, but the vets didn't think they could do any more, since you couldn't have your bladder expressed anymore either. I sure miss having you here with us. I thought you would be here for at least another 3 to 5 years. To me 12 seems so young, especially since you seemed so healthy except for that problem.  I don't know if taking you somewhere else would of made a difference, but I didn't want you to keep suffering from not being able to relieve yourself. I sure do wish that you had been able to get better. I hope that you are making lots of friends up there. You always were a friendly boy. Everyone was crying that was in the room with us when you went. I hope that you visit me again soon, even if I can't see you. Love you Har har. I will never forget my special boy, and you will always have a special place in my heart. Sending you some hugs and kisses. And some cuddles too.
anysia

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Posts: 85
 #6 
I think Harry has met my twinkle, also taken too early and cruely, at 12.5 years.... They are playing together, along with all of the other happy, healthy kitties and maybe even some Doggies taken too soon....  I'm pretty sure that no matterwhat we did, we would always question of there was something else we could have done... :( we would go to the ends of the world for our pets... We DID go to the end of the world for them. I know I have trouble remembering that, but we did. (((hugs)))
brenrae

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Posts: 4,647
 #7 
I wonder sometimes if he just needed more time to get better. I guess you have to do what is best for them, but it is hard to say sometimes. When we lost Baby Kitty 6 years ago (also on june 7), we knew it was coming because she had kidney failure. With Harry, he was fine, then whammo.
Mare

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Posts: 11,060
 #8 
When my bunny boy first passed on, I wrote letters to him all the time.  Talking to him really helped me in the early months.  Your letter to Harry is very sweet and I know how hard it is being without your sweet boy.  Our pets are wonderful blessings in our lives.

Mare-wolf
precious Christoph ~ gone four years now ~
brenrae

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Posts: 4,647
 #9 
I have picture of him on facebook, and I look at them, and write little messages to him every day.
brenrae

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Posts: 4,647
 #10 
Harry,

 Me again. Well tonight it is just me and Gabby here. Jeannie went to visit a friend. I am still missing you and wish you were here with me. I look out the back door just hoping you will magically appear, and I will awake from this nightmare of you being gone from me. I know that you didn't go in the yard unless I was with you, but hope springs eternal, they say. I wish things could have gone differently for you. I am not sure that I can get through not having you here with me. I keep hoping that it was a mistake, and you are still alive. I know that you are in Heaven, but I want to be able to pet you and kiss you again, And here your meow, and the noise you would make if you accidentally got bumped. You were so cute and you could always make me laugh. I don't know how I will get through the holidays without you, even though they are still a ways off. We always got you a bag with toys and tissue paper for you to enjoy. I hope they have a bag up there for you so you can tear out the tissue paper and strewn it all around. It really isn't getting easier for me. I wish you could come back, but I know that won't happen. Or if I could go back in time, maybe I could make sure you didn't get sick, then you would still be here. I love you my special boy. You took a part of my heart with you when you left. Hugs and kisses to you Harry. And a cuddle or two.
MissingShoestring

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Posts: 72
 #11 
Such sweet letters to Harry. Thinking of you.....HUGS Shoestring's Mom
kjgonz

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Posts: 598
 #12 
What a loving letter to your boy!  It's funny that you mentioned the holidays because I've been thinking about that, too.  We have a stocking for Rosie that is going to tear me apart when it's time to start decorating.  I hate waking up every day. 
brenrae

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Posts: 4,647
 #13 
I hate waking up also, because I know that he won't be here with me. I think about him constantly. And I cry several times throughout the day.
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,647
 #14 
Harry,

 There is so many things that we used to do together, that I don't do any longer. It is not the same without you beside me. I have not taken a nap since you have been gone, because that was a time for us to cuddle, and now you are not here with me. I haven't been in the back yard, unless I need to mow or do clothes. You are not here to do your perimeter check any longer, or lay on your back so that your belly could get some sun. The house is a lonely place without you here. No one to greet me when I come home, or wake me up 2 hours before the alarm. No one to knock my water off the table while I sleep. Yes, all your little habits are not here to amuse me any longer. No one to check my food to see if it is edible, and if you want some of it. My life is not the same with you gone. And in a few months i will have other changes in my life. I know that life changes, but I wish that some things would stay the same, at least for a while. I love you, Har Har. I know that we will be together again someday, though it doesn't stop the pain. Until then, I will be thinking of you and loving you. You are forever in my heart. Love to you my special boy. Here are some hugs and kisses for you, and some cuddles.
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,647
 #15 
Harry,

Today wasn't too bad for me. I still wish you were here with me. I know that my life will not be the same without you. I wish that I could of had a few more years with you. I know that in time being without you will get easier, but I will always miss you. If I could go back a few months, before you got the bladder blockage, I would try to keep you from getting it. I don't know if things could be changed, but I would try. Maybe it was just your time, but I wish you could of been at home. I know that you didn't like being at the vet's all the time. I love you, Harry, and that will never change. Until we meet again, sending you hugs and kisses and cuddles.  
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,647
 #16 
Harry,

 It has been 6 weeks now since you have been gone. I miss you as much now has when you went. I wish that you could still be with me, but that was not meant to be. I don't know when the pain of losing you will go away, but I know that you are healthy now, and don't have to worry about being sick. Who would of thought that a simple bladder blockage would be the end of you. I expected you to come home just as ornery as usual. Now I have no one to share things with. It is not the same with you gone. I know that I will see you again someday, and I look forward to the time when it is my turn. Until then,enjoy yourself with your new buddies, and visit me from time to time. I love you, Har Har. Sending you some kisses and hugs and cuddles. Love from your mommy, Brenda
RaggedyAnn

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Posts: 32
 #17 
Hugs to you! Your letters to Harry are beautiful.
kawinki

Registered:
Posts: 25
 #18 
Brenda, your letters to Harry are beautiful. I just lost my 7 yr old big boy to a stricture in his urethra that they could not fix. He was in the hospital for 8 days and I never thought he would never come home. He was so big, vital and healthy looking. It makes me angry that he left so soon and this is going to take some time to get through. My sister just called me and when I answered she said "what's the matter? You sound bad." I told her things aren't going to be good for awhile. Some people don't get it. I can't just be all smiles right now. His death and my responsibility for it stare me in the face every day. Hugs to you and keep on writing to Harry. Mary, Moonbeam's mom.
brenrae

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Posts: 4,647
 #19 
Mary, Harry was at the vet's for 3 weeks. I always thought he would come home. He still looked healthy when we decided not to let him suffer with not being able to urinate. All the medications, and he had a catheter 3 times, but nothing worked for my boy. Maybe it was a lot of things combined, I don't know. I just know that I miss him everyday.
kawinki

Registered:
Posts: 25
 #20 
Brenda, I am so glad I came here.  This site is giving me comfort, in an odd way.  I didn't think I would find anyone who lost their cat to urinary problems and it is helpful to read other people's stories, heartbreaking though they are.  I cannot imagine you survived those three weeks.  I almost went crazy with eight days.  You loved your boy and did the best for him.  I said to someone yesterday that I wish the Men In Black memory wand was real.  I would erase the last two weeks from my mind and only keep the good memories of my boy. I am sorry the missing hurts so much for all of us.
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,647
 #21 
The only thing that kept me going was the fact that I could visit him and spend a couple of hours with him. I can't do that now, which is hard for me. It wasn't fair to keep him any longer when his bladder wasn't contracting to let the urine out. If I knew what had caused his problem, I would go back in time and change it. I guess we all want that. But, I guess we can't keep them with us forever, except for in our hearts and memories.
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,647
 #22 
Harry,

 This morning we had a big thunderstorm, I know how much you hated storms, and we would cuddle while we were in bed and wait for it to be over. I guess there is no storms where you are now, just sunny skies, and gentle breezes. I hope you are getting all the foods you like. I am still missing you, and I don't think that will ever stop. Not a day goes by that you are not in my thoughts. You were always such a good boy, even when you would get into things, you were never destructive. Although knocking things off the entertainment center was ornery. I guess when you wanted what you considered your spot, you wanted it now. You were always a patient boy, and learned to wait if it wasn't time for something. Although you could also do things that showed you wanted it now, you still waited. There will never be another like you, and I will keep you forever in my heart and memories. I love you, Har Har. Hugs, kisses and cuddles to you. 
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,647
 #23 
Harry,

Tonight will be just me and Gabby. Jean has to work overnight. The loneliness I feel without you here has never ended. I am glad we had you for 12 years, though I would of liked longer. We had another big storm this morning. I was remembering how you were when you got your treats. You were always so gentle taking them from us. You are in my thoughts constantly. I will forever love you, my sweet boy. I wish there was something that could of been done for you. I am sending you some kisses and hugs and cuddles. Love you, Har har
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,647
 #24 
Harry,

I am really missing you today. Can't keep from crying. I done some of Jean's bedclothes, and found a big bunch of your fur. You always had such soft fur. I put it with your paw print. The days are so boring without you here. You helped keep me from feeling lonely, and now you are no longer here. I am sure you are having fun at the bridge, and one day we will be together again. I love you my special boy. Hugs, kisses and cuddles for you from me. Love you, Har Har 
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,647
 #25 
Hi Harry,

 I am still missing you. I was thinking of how you would act so cute as I was getting ready to go to work. It was like you were saying, "How can you leave, look how cute I am?". You would follow me around as I got ready and look at me with those big beseeching eyes. I always hated to leave you, but I had to work. I also think about how you would meet me when I came home at night, and if you weren't at the door, you were on my bed, watching for me to come in the bedroom and cuddle with you. I miss those things with you. You kept me from feeling alone and now you are gone. I know that we will be reunited again, but it seems like it has been forever since you haven't been by my side. You were usually in whatever room I was in. Moving form room to room with me. You were usually beside me, or at my feet, and you always had to have part of yourself touching me. I still don't sit anything on your part of the couch when it is supper time. I miss you my special boy. I love you forever. Sending you hugs, kisses and cuddles. Love you Har Har 
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,647
 #26 
Hi Harry,

 I am still missing you as much as I did in the beginning. I am not sure how I can get through the rest of the year without you here. They say when you lose something, that something better comes in its place, but I don't know what could be better than you. I wish that you were still here. I know that you did not want to go, but it would not of been fair to keep you here when your bladder wasn't allowing you to pee on your own. I don't know what caused the problem, but if I could of prevented it somehow, I would of. I don't know what my future holds in store, since I need to see a specialist about some problems I have been having. I wish you were here to help me through this time, you were always a comfort to me. I miss having you here when I come home from work, or shopping. I am glad that you are better now, though you are not here with me, I just miss you so much. I guess I am feeling a little sad today with you gone. I love you, Harry. Until we meet again, please stay by me in spirit. I am sending you some hugs, kisses and cuddles. I love you my sweet Har Har
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,647
 #27 
Hi Harry,

I love you, my special boy. I miss you more and more everyday. I wish that I could see you again, and be able to pet you and cuddle with you. I got the blanket that I used to keep you warm in the winter, and slept with it last night. It isn't the same as having you with me, but it gave me some comfort. I wish we could of had a few more years together, but that was not meant to be. I will always love you, and noone will ever be as special as you are to me. Please visit me more, and maybe came to me in my dreams. I love you, Har Har. Sending some hugs, kisses and cuddles your way.
yogacat

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Posts: 435
 #28 
I have read all your loving letters with tears in my eyes and understanding in my heart.  I relate so very much.  I appreciate you sharing.  
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,647
 #29 
Hi Harry,

I am really missing you today. I wish you were here with me still. I still don't know why it had to be your time to go. Didn't you deserve a few more years on earth? I feel so lonely without you here. The house feels empty without you. I wish that you could of gotten better, but you didn't. I know that you wanted to, but your body wasn't cooperating. I just want you back here with me. You are always on my mind, and in my heart. Until we meet again, here is some kisses, hugs and cuddles. I love you, Harry, my boy.
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,647
 #30 
Harry,

I am still missing you, my sweet boy. I am trying to remember that you are better now in Heaven, and that one day we will be together again. It doesn't ease the pain of losing you, but I will try to remember all the good times we had. I still cry for you everyday. It is lonely without you here.  I was remembering how your back feet were ticklish, and how you would ruffle your fur if we touched it just lightly, then give us a look that said, quit it. I love you, Har har. I will never forget my special boy, and how handsome you are. Until we meet again, sending you some hugs, kisses and cuddles on the wind, until I can give them to you in person.    
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,647
 #31 
Harry,

It has been 8 weeks now since you have been in heaven, 11 weeks since you have actually been home. I am really missing you my sweet boy. I wish every day that I could have you back. I wish that God had chosen to heal you. I know that it was my decision to have you put to sleep, but I couldn't let you continue with not being able to pee. I know you had to be uncomfortable most of the time. If I knew that you would eventually get better, I would of waited, but the vet seemed to think that you wouldn't. What kind of life would it of been for you? They said there was nothing else that they could do, so I had to let you go, though my heart was breaking. I so wanted you to get better and come home to us. I guess God needed you more in heaven than I needed you here. But, I need you still so much, that my heart still aches for you. You are such a big part of my life, even now that you are gone, but I don't have your company anymore. You kept me from being lonely. How am I supposed to continue on without you? I know that I am, but I am not happy without you here. All we needed was one little miracle. Did God really need you so much more than I did? I am happy that you are better, but a big part of my heart as been ripped out. I do hope that you are enjoying yourself up there. I am looking forward to the time that we are reunited. I love you, Har har. Sending you some hugs, kisses and cuddles. I wish I could give them to you for real, instead of on the wind. But, as my daughter says, It is what it is. Love you, Har Har.  Until we meet again, enjoy yourself with all the other cats and animals.
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,647
 #32 
Harry,

Why could you not have been healed? Was there no miracle for you, so that I could bring you back home? I really miss you. When I get off work, there is no joy anymore, because you are not here waiting for me. I can't sleep or eat because I miss you so much, and I cry just about all the time. I want you back, why can't I have you back with me???  When I sleep, I sleep on the couch most the time, because it is hard to sleep in the bed without you. I wish that you had never gotten whatever caused your problem. I wanted you to be with me for several more years. How am I supposed to live without you? Please I want you to come back, though I know you can't, but I still want you to. I love you, Har Har. Hugs, kisses and cuddles coming your way.
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,647
 #33 
Harry,

It has now been 2 months since you left us. I miss you more and more every day. You are always on my mind, no matter what I am doing. I am grateful for the time you was here with me, and would never change that. The pain of losing you is worth knowing you. You were such a special boy. There is nothing that I would change, except to have you here for longer. I know that one day we will be reunited, but it seems like forever to me. If you are watching, please visit me as you have in the past. I love you, my special boy. Love mommy. Sending some hugs, kisses and cuddles to you. Love you, Har Har
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,647
 #34 
Harry,

Today I mowed the yard, and was thinking about how it would of been a good day to take you outside, since it wasn't too hot or cold. Though it may have caused you to have one of your breathing fits, due to the pollen being up. I wish that you were still here with me, but I also hope that you are enjoying yourself where you are now. I will always feel the pain of losing you deeply, and wish that you were still here. I miss you every day, and you are constantly on my mind. I guess that I will have to continue on without you, but I would rather not. I know that I have to though. The choice is not mine. Thank you for choosing me as your person. I would never want that taken away. You were one of the best things in my life, and now you are gone. I love you, my special boy.  Sending you some hugs, kisses, and cuddles. Love, Mommy
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,647
 #35 
Harry,
I am really having trouble letting you go. I wish you were still here with me. I've been crying alot since yesterday. I don't know what is wrong with me. I guess it is a lot of things maybe. I just wish you had gotten better so that we could bring you home. I wasn't ready to let you go, but then again, I never would of been. I sure would of liked a few more years with you.I guess I am feeling super gloomy right now. I remember all the times when it was just you and me, and you would always be in whatever room that I was in. I never wanted to have to put you to sleep. If I thought you would get better I would of given you the time, but the vet didn't think you would. I sometimes wish that I had waited just a few more days, maybe you would of healed, but I knew it couldn't be comfortable for you, and I didn't want you to be miserable. Please let me know how you are, and maybe show me your place in Heaven. I love you, Har har. You will always be my special boy. Sending you some hugs, kisses, and cuddles. Love, Mom
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,647
 #36 
Harry,
Today would of been a good day to take you outside. It isn't too hot or cold, and we have a slight breeze. I wish that you were still here to enjoy the day with. It seems that the days just drag on with you being gone. I miss you more and more everyday, and you are always on my mind. My life is empty without you here. It is amazing how much you fulfilled my life just by being here. Now you are gone from my sight, and I must try to live without you. I will always love you, you were such a special boy. I know that one day we will be reunited, but it doesn't keep the pain away. I cry for you everyday. I love you, Har Har. Here are some hugs, kisses and cuddles. I wish that I could give them to you for real. Love, Mommy
grandma608

Registered:
Posts: 217
 #37 
Your letters to Harry are just beautiful. They are so filled with emotion and I can identify the same feelings with our Ginger. I especially liked what you said about knowing him and having him in your life was worth the pain of losing him.
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,647
 #38 
Thank you everyone for reading my letters. I wish that he was actually here physically with me, but I am sure that he is here in spirit.
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,647
 #39 
Harry,
It has been 10 weeks since you went to heaven, 13 weeks since you have been home. I am sorry that you had to spend your last weeks at the vet's office. I truly thought you would only be there for a few days, and all would be ok, and then you would be back home with us again. I miss you so much, not a day goes by that I do not cry for you. I want you to be here, but you aren't. And even though we did get another cat, she can't fill the void that you have left in my life. All I want is you. There have been so many good days now, that I know you would of enjoyed being outside. I miss doing things with you. You were always with me, unless I was at work. I love you, Har Har. Love Mommy. Sending some kisses, hugs, and cuddles for you.
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,647
 #40 
Harry,
It is now at the 11 week mark since you have been gone. I still cry for you every day, and I think about you constantly. Jean will be leaving Saturday, and will be gone for nine days. How am I supposed to make it without you by my side. You were my constant companion. It is lonely for me now that you are gone. I don't know if I will ever be truly happy again. With you and Jean, my life was perfect. Now you are gone, and Jean will be leaving in a few months. I wish that you had gotten better, so that we could be together. I miss you so much, and I don't feel that will ever change. I truly thought that you would be older when your time came. I wish every day that the outcome had been better. The weather is starting to cool down now, and I know you would of enjoyed being outside. I miss taking you out, and giving you your treats, and having you wake me up at five in the morning because you wanted to be fed, though it was still two hours away. Now, I can sleep through the night, but I would rather have you here with me. I even miss you knocking off my water bottle to get my attention when I was still in bed. I just miss you completely.
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