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Ghatten

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Posts: 1,821
 #41 
The thing everyone needs to keep in mind is not every dog (or any other animal) that becomes aggressive was abused, and not every abused animal will become aggressive. There may also be an underlying factor, may be inbreeding, may be just bad luck in the breeding genetics, may be just the role of the proverbial dice. You can breed 2 animals that are the best of the best, who come from long lines of best of the best, and each offspring in a litter may be soooo different it is hard to believe they have the same parents, let alone that they are from the same litter. In a single litter you can have alphas, betas, and omegas, highly active pups and couch potatoes, super smart pups and pups who are - well they are sweet and lovable, and very social pups and pups whose minds just are not right. You do have to train and socialize pups, but some even trying the best techniques with will not socialize. Think of human children, some from bad homes (abuse and such) will go on to perpetuate the life they grew up in, but some will go on to great, productive, and wonderful lives, and some from wonderful homes who grow up knowing only love and opportunity grow up to be monsters or with demons they sometimes cannot control. All we can do with our children (be they human, furred, feathered, or scaly) is love them and do our best for and by them. And sadly sometimes that is not enough and all we can do is accept what is and love them. True, we can create monsters - but we can't always fix them.
theresemarie14

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 #42 
Thank you all for such kind words. I am going back and forth between being okay with my decision knowing it's the best thing for him and for us but than I break down again and think about all the what if's. He has showed us so much love and I just don't understand why it is not the same for anyone else. I have prayed last night and this morning asking for the strength to get through this and to know I am making the right decision. Sometimes I can feel it coursing through my body but other times I feel so weak. I am so blessed to have such an amazing vet who has showed us nothing but kindness in deciding this outcome as well as my family, and the family on here. Last night we played with his favorite ball with him alone in the backyard, took him for a walk(in a deserted area where no people were around), and gave him lots of treats and love. I know we have given him such a great life full of love and I just hope he knows how much we love him and always will when he leaves this earth. I keep telling myself all dogs go to heaven and he will be happier there without a stress in the world. Thank you all again so much for being here to talk to and for being so understanding.  
theresemarie14

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Posts: 3
 #43 
Well it has been 2 full days without Dobby and by far the hardest thing I have ever endured. I showed my fiancée this forum and we have looked at a few others that have absolutely helped us cope through all of this. I wanted to share this story with all of you; On Friday after we put Dobby down my fiancée was not doing well at all and wanted to go see his parents, so straight from the vet we took of on a 45 min drive down to his parents house as we were between crying so hard and than talking it out with each other we finally arrived. He instantly was doing better with the sight of his parents and talking with them. I was finally done crying and doing a little bit better but still could not stop thinking about him. My head felt like it was 50 times too big and I developed a stress knot on the back of my head that was killing me so I decided I wanted to go home. We said our goodbyes and as soon as I sat in the passenger seat of the car I broke down. I could not stop crying for a good 20 minutes while he just talked to me and held my hand reassuring me that we made the right decision and everything was going to be okay. As I finally stopped crying and could talk to him we were driving down the freeway and we both just so happened to look at the same spot in the sky when a shooting star passed. I have only ever seen one shooting star in my lifetime before this one. As soon as I saw it before I could even register what it was the words "It's Dobby" fell out of my mouth and a rush of peace surged through my body. I was finally okay at that moment. Of course it was so hard when we got home to him not there as well as trying to keep my other dog busy so he wouldn't be sad looking for him because I was just not sure if I was going to be able to handle that. I take him for a walk every morning since that was usually their play time, bought him a bunch of new toys and a new bed. We have been doing better but both still have our moments. I just wanted to thank you all again so much for being there when no one else was. God bless!
Cp123

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Posts: 3
 #44 
This forum has been helping me cope in the past 48 hours. I felt so alone and so guilty for having to put my baby boy down 2 days ago due to agression. Thank you everyone for sharing their stories, as it is helping so so much knowing I am not alone nor being judged.

We adopted my little Pitt bill mix boy a year ago. Prior to us, he had another home for a month, which did not work out. From what we understood, he had a fight with the last owners dog and caused multiple wounds. We were told it was the other dogs fault and it was due to food. We asked the shelter if food agression is a problem now and they said no since the other dog was the instigator. My husband and I fell in love with our baby and took him home. He was 1.5 and we were so in love. Endless days on the couch snuggling, kisses, walks and so much love we shared. It was our family of 3. We felt so complete. After we adopted him, my husband wanted to make sure he was not food aggressive. We found out fast he still was as he bit my husbands hand as he went near the food bowl. This left a scar but was not enough to get stitches. Instead of taking him back to the adoption center, we got a trainer and went to endless 1:1 classes to help this behavior. I hand fed him for weeks on end and it seemed to help. Regardless, we placed him in the garage during meals...just in case. With any other food, he was fine it was just his bowl food so we figured we can live with this. We loved him so who cared. Fast forward to 4 months later, my husband and I were chatting and my husband raised his voice joking about something and then our baby boy came over and jumped at my husband and nipped his butt. Again, no blood just a little scratch we thought. We chalked this up too. We figured we loved him and we will just reinforce training again. We spent countless hours the next weeks with our training so he knew who was who in the pack. Because we loved him and wanted to do everything to help, we continued to keep him as our family. Throughout this time, our baby boy was so gentle, so loving, the best dog ever. Daily couch snuggles with my husband and I, hikes, boat trips, beach trips, everything we did he was there with us. He was our pack. He was the best dog I’ve ever owned. He was my literal shadow. We did everything together. Everything. I loved him so much, beyond what words can even describe. He was my boy. We got the news that I was pregnant and sooooo excited! We couldn’t wait for our newborn to meet our dog and always talked about how great they’ll be together and how our family will be so complete. The 4 of us. Well, 2 days ago was the worst day of my life. It was 1030pm and we all just finished a movie and we always give our night kisses to the dog. Our dog was all snuggled in on the couch. I went to kiss him and he wagged his tail, awake and was smiling so big. My husband then went to give him kisses, like we always do everyday and every night and he was smiling,’dough eyed and waving his tail. Out of nowhere, my husband screams bloody murder. I had no idea what was happening. Our dog grabbed him face and wouldn’t let go. It seemed like it was hours. My husband pried his jaws off his face which was gushing blood. I grabbed our dog and put him in his cage. It was like he had no idea what he did. He went in his cage just wagging his tail. A ER visit later and 15 stitches, lacerations and bruises to his face, we had a horrible decision to make. We had to fill out a bite report which meant if we took him to any kennel, he would be ultimately put down. We knew me being 5 months pregnant, and the situation placed in our hands, we had to let him go but with us with him and holding him tight, not some random kennel. It was the hardest decision we have ever had to make. My husband felt so betrayed by his best friend and we will never understand why these snapping episodes ever happened. The food agression and the other snapping from my husband raising his voice we made excuses for and thought “oh it was provoked and our fault” - well, this one made no sense. It was like a switch went off out of nowhere. Wagging his tail and smiling so big to a snap like that was just crazy. We had to think of our newborn coming into the world. Was he going to do this to him? No warning sign? Nothing. That was the scariest part. ALL incidents never had a warning sign. No growls, no ears back. Nothing. It was tail wagging, smiling and content. We put him down 2 days ago at the age of 3. We held him tight and I couldn’t let go. It was the hardest thing I ever did. I will always love him. He was my baby. I have been getting judgement on why we didn’t try hard enough to get a placement but we couldn’t. I called the shelters and they said bc he has a bite history now, nobody will adopt and ultimately he will be put down. I couldn’t imagine that. I wanted to be there with him, not alone in a cage and random people. I had to think of the safety of our newborn, our family and our dog. It wasn’t fair to him to bounce around and around kennel to kennel just to ultimately meet death alone in the face. We loved him uncontrollably and still are so shocked his happened. The guilt I have is so strong because I feel like I didn’t do enough and I failed as his mother. He was our family and I can’t get him out of my head. The house is so empty and I just want him back so so bad. If someone could please provide me comfort in this time it would be great. I’ve been so torn up and so sad. The tears won’t stop. I just think of that face I loved and the walks, cuddles and time we had and it tears me apart. It wasn’t suppose to be like this. He was suppose to meet our newborn and everything go okay. We were so excited. Now, we just are sad. My poor husband has a mauled face and is still so upset...that is how much he meant to us. Did I do the right thing? I just need support. Thank you soooooo much everyone here.
Ghatten

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Posts: 1,821
 #45 
}{{{{{CP123}}}}}{

read the stories in this thread - they will let you know you are not alone - most are from others who have gone through / are going through the same heart break you and your husband are. If time permits look back at post 24, 30, and 41 - they may offer you both some comfort. As to your broken hearts? There are no words or perfect cures for that - you have lost someone you love, only time can heal that and there is no set timeline any of us can offer you.
Cp123

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Posts: 3
 #46 
Thank you. It is really helping us cope. It is such a good feeling that I am not being judged nor criticized here for having to do what we did. So many are quick to say they would never do such a thing but they forget that they were never in our shoes.
KobasMom114

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Posts: 14
 #47 
}{{{{{CP123}}}}}{ 

yes, love. First off, I am so sorry. read koba;s story... It will help you understand what just happened to you. From what I hear in your story, you seem to have gone through the same thing as me. Guarding is genetic but when a bad experience reinforces their behavior it becomes the perfect storm. I'm assuming that your pup had some confrontations in the past with his original owner. Your husband had probably scared him the day he discovered his food guarding again which triggered a perceived fear with the raising of his voice, etc. Some dogs are very delicate and it seems questionable that the shelter could have chalked it up to just guarding amongst the dogs at his previous home. 

Like my story, my dog Koba was the best boy ever, and had overcome his guarding and was making strides on his dog aggression. About a month in had a bad experience with my aunt (way worse than just going to grab his food), where her dog came running down, he reacted, and she screamed bloody murder. He loved her but was a little different since. I couldn't quite put my finger on it as he started licking obsessively when she'd come down to hang out or give her whale eyes. I never knew he was capable of doing that without his regular progression of warnings. He gave some subtle warnings the day he bit her in the face on my bed.

If I had known to look for those guarding signs things could have been different but regardless it showed that despite all of my efforts to make him happy his demons outweighed his fight. It turns out, it wasn't just "out of the blue"... he was guarding. He was guarding ME though. Sounds like in this scenario, your boy was guarding you. I hope this doesn't make you feel guilty as dogs only guard their most precious resources that they are afraid to lose, and you were that to your boy. Try and find comfort in knowing that he knew love at the end of his life. 

Yesterday was 6 months since I made the heart wrenching decision to euthanize Koba. I will never be the same but it does get better it just takes a long time of living in a fog. It's a battle that is pretty much fought alone. For a while, coming here was the only thing that helped. 

Today I came across this lovely post by a rescue on this exact matter and I feel it was really beautifully written. If you ever need to sort out these complex and earth shattering emotions, I am always here. 

https://www.facebook.com/LoveabullRescueSociety/photos/a.356778421148275/1086346908191419/?type=3&theater

Love, 
Koba's Mom


Scotty99

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Posts: 2
 #48 
I cannot express my feelings on finding this tonight my house feels empty my darling Gerrad went to the bridge yesterdat after biting my daughter ots
Scotty99

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 #49 
I cannot express my feelings on finding this tonight my house feels empty my darling Gerrad went to the bridge yesterdat after biting my daughter I always kept him away from kids when I wasnt in the room(cant work out how hr got in) as he had always been a cross man always barking growling and being a pain. That said he was also loving and had such a personality but every day was hard. I still dont kmow how he got in living room but I wasin kitchen when I heard the cry. It was awful my daugther lost a tooth plus nasty scratches. Happened in a split second but the decion had been made by me as he would never be re homed. My ex who loved him took him ti the vet and has said to me its my fault and he told me I killed him. Totally heartbtoken as even he knows gerrard had many many issues but I now have such greif and guilt even though I know it was right. I said my goodbyes thursdsy night just crying saying you silly silly boy as he just looked at me wagging his tail. God I miss him so so much but I thank god my daughter will be ok but my ex will never forgive me. I love you Gerard run free forever xxx
ZeusDad14

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Posts: 4
 #50 


Today has been horrible for me. I rescued my dog Zeus from a shelter. He was an absolute sweetheart A German Sheppard mixed with Australian Cattle dog. He was colored like a German Sheppard but had short hair and one blue eye. He also had "two left ears" we used to joke because of how his right ear laid on top of his head. After a short time we realized that he was seriously abused as a puppy. He would flinch all the time and wet himself. We just kept giving him love and treated him as one of the family. Finally he stopped flinching anD wetting as he knew he was loved.

We would take him on walks every day along with our other dogs. Twice while out on walks he was attacked by other dogs who's owners felt they should not have their aggressive dogs on leashes. After these instances he was very weary of other dogs. Now it was like flipping a coin as to whether he would like or be very aggressive with the other dogs. Then he became aggressive with my 90 year old grandmother-in-law and nipped her. During this time I looked up and took him to different trainers and behaviorists. I tried everything they suggested and his aggression just stayed like a switch that would turn off on then off in an instant. Then he bit my 13 year old son who is the one that feeds him and he also bit my daughter. Each time he was overcome with grief and remorse as soon as it was over. He never showed any aggression to me, my wife or oldest son. Zeus was such a sweetheart to us 99% of the time. Zeus also bit a kid on a bike who was running over my other small dog with his bike.

I took him to my vet and the vet spent time with him and said he was a reflexive biter along with having trauma from when he was with the other family. I told him all the things we have done with Zeus to help him. With all this Zeus was a sweetheart there but he did growl at the assistant but not the vet. The vet told me that sometimes dogs suffer a form of PTSD from the trauma they suffered and they just see red for an instant and cannot control themselves for a moment. This was Zeus to a tee. I love my Zeus and had to have him put down today. He stayed in my lap for hours as the drugs did not work on him and they had to give him a shot. I could not bring myself to stay in the room once Zeus was sleepy from the drugs.

We had a wonderful 3 years and I wish he could have overcome his trauma. Zeus did not deserve this and it was not his fault as others were horrible to him as a puppy and bad owners who do not leash their own aggressive dogs. But this did affect him and we could not identify many of his triggers. His life would have been being left in his kennel at home with no walks and regulating interaction with him to only if I was there. I love my Zeus and he is released from the demons that haunted him, this was still the hardest thing I have done with my dogs. Years ago I had to have my 12 year old Golden Retriever put down years ago because he had a brain tumor and was in a lot of pain and suffering. That was sad but I knew it was the best thing for him, I had no guilt. Now I am overcome with guilt and it is tearing me up. I spent the last three years trying to help him overcome, now Zeus is free and my heart breaks but I am relieved for him as well.

Sladelsol

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Posts: 2
 #51 
I'm sorry about you losing Koba. I understand your pain, the conflicting emotions, the what is and maybes. I know about dogs being abused and having trust issues. I had to surrender my small Chihuahua mix today because he acts aggressive toward my mom and nipped/but her several times. She is elderly and I'll. I feel like I want to blame her. For not handling him "right". I feel no one understood him but me and that made our bond special. I know how you feel. I'm grieving too. It is hard to feel like you are choosing between two family members. Hugs.
Brodebaby

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Posts: 1
 #52 
I will be in the same boat. My sweet boy Brode, a 4.5-year-old boxer great dane mix is the sweetest cuddle bug, running partner, and goober to play frisbee with to his people, but to those, he doesn't know he is a terrifying fear aggressive dog. Over the last 4 years, we have worked with 3 different trainers, a behavior specialist, and tried medications. Where we live, if 3 bites are reported, the dog must be euthanized. He has 2 legal strikes but has bitten over 10 people. Anyone who is unfamiliar to him is scary, and at 95 lbs, he is scary right back. I've come to the conclusion, after so many years of working with him, changing my lifestyle, limiting exposure, and so many injuries to others and myself physically, and Brode mentally, it is time to let him be at peace. I've tried to keep the information to close friends and family, but a peripheral acquaintance found out and that he is leaving us, and took it upon themselves to post my dog to facebook looking for someone to take him, which would result in no rescue taking him, the shelters refusing to take him, and eventually a family euthanizing him who does not love him the way I do. 
I'm coming to terms with my decision, but comments from people on facebook are adding insult to injury. They have no idea what his story is, what we've tried, but are name calling, and questioning, what I have realized is a very ethical and morally sound decision. 
This is making my heart break even more, but I am so glad there are others who have gone through situations similar to ours and have come out on the other side.
Cp123

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Posts: 3
 #53 
Brodebaby — don’t worry what those people say. The same thing happened to us. My sister in law decided to try to get us help and posted to Facebook without our knowledge and she didn’t know we already put our baby boy down. Then, she told everyone that we euthanized him and oh goodness, the hate messages came filling in my inbox and all over. I ultimately deleted Facebook because of this. My sister in law also portrayed us as horrible people and “supposedly” trying to get training, etc when we did everything we could from animal behaviorist to trainers and thousands of dollars later to try to help our little boy. Please please don’t listen to these people. Needless to say, I have cut my sister in law out of my life now after she displayed her true colors. They have no idea what we are going through or had to go through in making the decisions. They have not stepped foot in our shoes nor have any say. I, like you could not phantom placing our sweet boy back to a Kennel after 3 bites and food aggression just to ultimately be put down without the ones he loves. That to me is more inhumane then anything. You did the right thing and although it hurts, it is something you did as a good and responsible owner. Your dog loved and will always love you and you did the more humane thing not only for the loved ones around you but for his own health and well being.
ZeusDad14

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Posts: 4
 #54 

The thing my vet told me about Zeus is that he did bite family and he had bit a kid on a bike that did scare him. He said the next bite Zeus would be taken, quarantined and after 14 days he would be put down. My vet told me that Zeus would be terrified for those two weeks and then put down alone and in fear. Our only option at that point would be just to keep him in my kennel at home by himself, not going on walks or camping which would just further his aggression as we could not continue to wait for the next bite if we let him inside with the family, this is no way to live for a dog. Also none of the humane shelters would take him. So giving him a nice meal and spending the last two hours with me loving and  hugging him. The last thing he knew was me holding him and rubbing his chest like he loved while he fell asleep. It was hard I cried for two days straight but I know it was best for Zeus as he is now free from the trauma that haunted him and was taking over his mind. Zeus was a sweet dog and he was so upset when he would slip and bite, it was like he knew it was wrong and was upset at himself for having this lapse. It was the right thing to do, I am in pain but at peace at the same time. 

We feel loss of our furry friends but we should not feel bad for freeing them from a life that they are hurting in and feeling trapped to do things they know is wrong but cannot help themselves.

I love you Zeus.

Ghatten

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Posts: 1,821
 #55 
to all those on this thread getting harassment from outsiders (such as strangers on Facebook)share the info in this thread (like what vets have suggested and said) and if it will help copy and share posts 24 and 41 as a combined writing. (I will try to get the graphic in working again in post 24.) And IF Facebook has a problem with you sharing someone else's writings point out you did credit the writer (the copyright info is in post 24) - if they still have an issue let me know - I can send them any permissions they need.
ZeusDad14

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Posts: 4
 #56 
It has been two months now and I still miss my Zeus. When I go into my office and get my stuff for work each day I look over to where his bed used to be. I would reach down and scratch his head and say good morning, then I would leave for work. Early in the morning when I go down there I still expect to see him laying there and it breaks my heart that he is gone. I know what I did was right but it still hurts. I miss my Zeus.
Bayou

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Posts: 2
 #57 
We lost our Bayou last Wednesday.  Like the rest of you, I have to reconcile putting down a dog who was so loving and sweet between episodes.  It started slowly and there always seemed to be a reason for the incidents, and a plan for how to eventually beat it.  But the level of aggression in his bites had been escalating over the last eight months despite several trainers, medication, vet exams, etc.  I resigned myself to euthanizing him three months ago when a very deep bite to my forearm put me in the ER.  The only reason we didn't follow through with it was that our vet would not perform the procedure, and our trainer still seemed to think there was hope.  This made us feel so guilty - were we wrong to give up?  We decided to keep trying. 

Several weeks ago he attacked my fiancee so badly that she barely escaped the house and needed an orthopedic surgeon to repair the wound to her arm.  We couldn't let him wait the 10-day quarantine in our home while she recovered, so we had to shelter him with the county for that period.  It's heartbreaking to me to think that's where he spent his last 10 days.  The humane society where we adopted him offered to allow us to do a compassionate euthanization so that we could be with him at the end.  We picked him up from the county shelter, took him on a long nature walk, fed him more fast food than I thought any 55-pound being could possibly eat, and did our best to say goodbye. 

The 10 day quarantine moved so slowly, but I'll never forget how quickly that last afternoon passed by, or the look on his face when they brought him to the room at the end ... muzzled.  He gave me a little tail wag but the muzzle made his breathing sound difficult.   I hope he wasn't afraid.  I held him until the end and well after.  I can't stop replaying those last minutes in my mind, or hearing the sound of his last breaths.  So much shame and regret and sadness it's hard to function.  I'm in a deep, dark place but it helps to know there are others who have lived through this.  My heart goes out to all of you.
rnl5862

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Posts: 5
 #58 
I just put down my dog Luna yesterday morning and I'm a mess. I had Luna for nine years. Nine wonderful years. She was my first dog, she was my shoulder to cry on during every breakup, she was my running buddy during all of my "get fit new year resolutions", she was my road trip partner, my snuggle buddy.... my everything. As wonderful as she was.... she suffered from severe anxiety. Her anxiety manifested itself in aggression. Separation anxiety, food aggression, aggression towards animals & unprovoked would show aggression towards people. She has been on medication for 7 years, and I've tried trainers, behavior specialists, a personal runner, CBD tinctures and yet I still couldn't fix her. She has bitten myself multiple times, family members, friends & other dogs and yet i continued to make excuses for her behavior, "she is tired, hungry, i stood too close to her food and I know better, you walked in too loud and you know better than to startle her etc... Recently her anxiety is getting worse & her aggressive incidents are becoming more frequent. She attacked an animal, & then turned on me. She bit my boyfriend while he has walking past while she was chewing on a bone & then a few days I was caressing her and she snarled & lunged at my face. I don't know why I just can't....I couldn't fix her. Im so incredible sad. I feel so guilty right now & have never regretted any decision I have made more than this one. I can't believe I went through with it. Why didn't I just walk out of that vet office? Why did i take her there in the first place? I made this decision. And everyone just supported it. No one tried to talked me out of it. No one was Lunas advocate. I will never ever forgive myself for this.
morgc927

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Posts: 15
 #59 
RNL5862–


I know your heartache, I feel it every day since I made the decision to let go of my Penny. I had such a hard time with this because,like you, it was I who made the decision.. my husband said nothing, it was I who walked her into the vets office. Because of that I carry so much guilt. I had a dream the other night and she was in it.. maybe her way of saying “I forgive you, mom” I can only hope...


I hope your heart begins to heal ❤️
rnl5862

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 #60 
@morgc927 thank you
rnl5862

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 #61 
@bayou It's been two days since I put my dog down & although I still feel a deep heartache it is getting a little easier to get through the day. I hope you can say the same. I am wishing you & everyone on this forum a sense of peace & forgiveness.
~rnl5862
Cliffysmomma

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Posts: 1
 #62 
I had to put down my fur baby Clifford today and i am a complete wreck. I got him from a shelter about 8 months ago. He had just turned 3 and he was the most loving, happy, cuddly little nugget. After a few weeks he started to show aggression towards other dogs and people, and bit someone, then a few months later another bite, we did the quarantine and I immediately got him in with a behaviorist. The behaviorist got us started on some meds and helped us really analyze his history. Turns out between shelters and hoems he had been in 7 different places before the age of three. Anyway months went on, training was going awesome, and it really seemed like my pup was improving. I thought we were out of the woods, and then he bit me out of the blue. After that bite I had the most brutal week of my life, between calling different trainers and vets and shelters, trying to find out the best option for Cliffy, I wanted to do whatever I could to keep him alive. I knew rehoming wasn't an option with his bite history and because of how many homes he had been in prior to mine, but I had to hear it from shelters first, to give myself some piece of mind. The only other option was trying more meds, but that would require a wean off period, and what if they didn't work, it was too much emotionally to know that I would have to wait and see, and what if he bit someone else on the new meds and then I would have to put him down anyway. After extensive research and talking to different professionals, i knew the only way to keep my furbaby and others safe was to put him to sleep. We had a wonderful morning and I made sure he was happy and loved, i stayed with him the whole time at the vet and made sure he knew he was not alone. Now as I sit here alone, i feel a huge hole in my heart and in my home. I keep hoping to hear his collar jingle or his nails click on the ground and the silence is deafening. I feel so guilty for my choice to put him to sleep and have had people tell me that I am awful for making that decision, but those people have never been in my shoes. living a life in fear that your dog would bite someone else or have a leash break and he would get away. Having a dog that wants to run and play be confined to a house and small yard. His quality of life was no longer what it should be and even though i know that, it doesn't make it any easier. I feel like in some ways I failed this dog, that maybe there was something else I could do. I am so glad I found this forum, other people going through the same things. I miss my little man so much and I hope he knows how much his momma lloved him. I hope he finds peace and that his mind can be at ease over the rainbow bridge and hopefully we meet again. I love you and I miss you so much Clifford. My house does not feel the same without you.
rnl5862

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Posts: 5
 #63 
Cliffysmomma. I'm sorry that you are going thru this. I had to put my dog down a little over 2 weeks ago & I know what kind of heartache you are feeling. My best advice to you is that it's okay to cry, be sad, yell, get angry, laugh & then cry again. It's okay to grieve. In any way that makes sense for you & for as long as you need. I promise you that it will get easier to get thru the day. I am still struggling with the guilt, regret & heartache of putting my own dog down but this forum does help to know im not alone. Also.... find 1 or 2 people that will listen to you without judgement. I find that talking about my emotions good & bad and talking about dog & talking about ways to remember her helps me comes to term with the fact that she is no longer here. I promise... it gets easier. ~rnl5862
CarFrank26

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Posts: 3
 #64 
Hi, i know most of them comments are from after putting your beloved pets down. I made the decision today to put my 9 year old boy down in a few weeks time :( it’s something my husbands never pushed me on as he knows how much I love him. We’ve had him since he as 8 weeks old, he’s 5th generation well bred puppy and we followed every puppy book and walked him loads and from around 6 months he just suddenly was a little aggressive and over the years this has got worse. He has in the past nipped at people who try to pet him, mainly when he’s cornered or if he’s petted on his snout area. I’m unsure why. When I got him I stayed at home with my mum and was at college part time so not sure if somethings happened. I’ve had my own home now for over 7 years and nothing changed we have just learned what not to do with him. My other 2 dogs are totally fine with him just every now and again my Yorkie has been attacked by Frankie for trying to cuddle into him. He gets agitated when the Yorkie walks past him. He growls if we try to pet him so I’ve had to seclude him to the kitchen during the day for the past 2 years since my little girl was born. We have a massive outdoor kennel for nice days he’s out but he’s a house pet I can’t keep him out there it’s also no life for him. He cries when he’s separated from my other dog the Labrador. Today Frankie was at the groomers and when my husband went to pick him up the groomer said he tried to attack her several times even when she was just bathing him. I have to admit I’m frightened of him at times and after the groomer explain what happened today and the seriousness of his aggresion I knew my decision had to be made to put him down. I must come across as selfish keeping him until now but I’ve had him 9 years and as much as he’s aggressive he is also the most amazing boy and seems happy enough. He wags his tail when he s was sees us he loves his walks and he’s a good boy most of the time. But.. I have 2 small daughters and one has just learned to open the baby gates and can reach the door handles and as much as I tell her we don’t pet Frankie cause he’s a naughty boy I know as soon as she sees him she will run to hug him and if anything happens this will 100-% be my fault and of course my child comes first but making the decision to end an animals life is so huge it’s breaking my heart. I’ve called sspa and rescue centres and all have said a rescue centre would stress him more and make him more aggressive and someone else’s problem and they think he will eventually be put to sleep anyways so may as well be with us the people he loves. I can’t re home cause No one wants an aggressive dog and I’d be terrified someone was nasty to him or hurt him because of how he is and I can’t bare the thought of him being mistreated. We have 2 weeks to give him the best time of his life I’m not sure if this will be a good or bad idea waiting the 2 weeks. Good for him to give him the best time ever but knowing what I’m going to do and it’s irreversible is eating me alive. Am I making the right decision, is there something else I can do? We thought about trainers but I wouldn’t ever trust him around my babies even after a trainer the trust has definitely gone :( I know this is long but I just needed someone to off load to my husband is very much it’s the only option and it’s better for him he’s getting no life since the kids came .. I honestly can’t deal with having to put down a healthy dog 💔
rnl5862

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Posts: 5
 #65 
Hey CarFrank26

I had my dog Luna for 9 years & dealt with the same issues. She was such an amazing sweet & loveable dog but she would have these moments of aggression. I felt like I was walking on egg shells but was constantly making excuses for her aggressive outbursts. There is a time when we have to stop making excuses. Like you said, now you have babies who you need to protect. Im sorry that you have to experience this. It is not a good feeling & you will be heartbroken but there is an odd sense of peace that comes with knowing that your animal feels no more pain, fear, anger, anxiety or aggression. All you can do is give your pup so much love & treats until their time comes. Sending many good & healing vibes your way.
marcyzombi3

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Posts: 9
 #66 
Hello ,
CarFrank26,

I’m so sorry you have to make this tough decision. I had to let my baby go yesterday because he was suffering from arthritis and spinal pain. He was a chihuahua mix and also had times of being aggressive. Since he was in pain at times if we touched him or picked him up he would snap at us and it made it hard to care for him. It broke my heart because I couldn’t help him and after he would snap he would make a face like saying I’m sorry. He didn’t want to bite us, he was just in pain. Just know that you’re doing the best you can and it’s okay. He will always be your baby no matter what.
CarFrank26

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Posts: 3
 #67 
Thank you both so much and I’m so so sorry for your loss. Rnl5862 that’s exactly how I feel with Frankie like he’s a ticking time bomb and I’m scared to push to much and get to much for him. I so want to pet him and cuddle him but it’s like his eyes go glazed and he goes so stiff and snarls it’s horrible. Worse thing though since booking the appt at the vets he’s been so so good but I have to remember why I’m doing it. This is honestly the worse thing in the whole world!! Every time I look at him I’m sobbing I feel I’m really letting him down but both of your replies has helped me massively I know it’s the kindest thing for him and I know he’s had an excellent life. I just know this is really gonna break me 💔 it’s so nice to speak to people who understand an aggressive dog is still good at heart and you still love them just as much as a non aggressive dog. The pain is horrendous. I hope your both ok xxxx
CarFrank26

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Posts: 3
 #68 
Marcyzombi3

Sending lots of love to you ❤️❤️ You have done the best thing for your little baby and I hope each day gets a little easier for you x
Bayou

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Posts: 2
 #69 
I think about Bayou every day but more and more I feel the love not the pain and regret.  I wish the same for all of you.
Nic07d

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Posts: 1
 #70 
I had to put my Penny down in January of this year. She was the most loving, goofy, wonderful dog I could have ever asked for- always a lap dog and wanting to be near me. But in her two years of life, she progressively got more and more unpredictably aggressive. We tried medications, training, collars and nothing would help ease her poor mind. She was a very fearful dog and we were never quite sure why. She had always been surrounded by a loving family and had as much attention as she could possibly have. 

Thankfully, she never hurt anyone too badly. She had several major, violent fights with my mom's dog and eventually it turned into unpredictable aggression towards humans. 

In her two years of life, we tried to identify and avoid so many triggers but her list of triggers kept growing and growing and it came to the point we were living our lives around them. 

The day before I had to make the most heartbreaking decision of my life, she had attacked my mom's boyfriend and would not let go. After that attack, she just was not right. It was almost like something broke in her and we were afraid of her. 

We tried to bring her back to the rescue we had gotten her from- hoping they would have some sort of resource that we did not know of that could help rehabilitate her. They said they would take her back but would likely end up euthanizing her themselves. 

Rather than having her pass alone, my mom and I decided to take her to a wonderful vet who put my baby to sleep while she laid in my arms and was surrounded by my love. 

I would give anything in the world to have my Penny girl back laying next to me on the couch every night. The world just doesn't feel the same without her in it. 2 months later, I am still struggling with the guilt and sadness of putting down my physically healthy, strong, loving dog. I know that she was mentally sick and was likely haunted with fears, anxieties, and demons that made her so easily set off. I am glad to have been able to get her ashes back and her paw print and to have avoided her causing significant harm to any person or animal. 

For those of you that have gotten another dog- has your experience putting down an aggressive dog made you fearful at first of getting another one? I am terrified of going through this again and honestly am a little afraid of being bitten by a dog. I don't want to be afraid because I love dogs so much. How do you know when you are ready? 

I truly appreciate the kind words I have seen on this forum by others and you all are in my thoughts as well. This is truly one of the most heartbreaking things to go through. 
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