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RustysMom

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Posts: 1,015
 #201 

Dear Melanie ~

Just stopping by to say “hello,” and to see how you’re doing. I so absolutely love the story of Lee Lee’s Lambchop. And then you pulled the trigger . . . when I read you sent Lambchop w/Lee Lee on her journey “a pretty for the angels” ~ I just couldn’t take it. Such a wonderful & thoughtful gesture. I’m so sure that Lee Lee was incredibly comforted by that.  Your story reminds me of a similar situation when I was younger ~ we had two Siamese kitties. One very adventurous, the other, completely content to stay indoors w/his humans. Our adventurous one had to say goodbye to us when he was only 7. I remember that kitty loved to curl up on a favorite navy sweater of mine. We wrapped our baby in that sweater so he would have something of us with him on his journey.

It means a lot to me knowing that we have these special connections with our babies & their belongings &/or any other aspect in relation to their existence on this earth ~ like getting a message through a feather.
I recently took a kitty brush out & found some of LuluBelle’s (the Beans) hair & took that hair & put it w/her ashes. I’ll never discard anything that has to do with one of my babies. The box that LuluBelle used the most (& the one she spent her last hours in at the house,) still sits in the same spot in our kitchen, over 14 months later. I’m quite sure it will never move.

Sending you big hugs!

RustysMom Allison ~ mom to Rainbow Bridge angels Rusty, LuluBelle & Bingo ~ mom to furry earth babies Woodstock, Bam Bam & Maybe & Picasso.

LeeLeesMama

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Posts: 2,800
 #202 
Dear Allison,
You are so sweet to check in on me and to read my baby's story of her Lambchop - she loved it so much. Telling the story was bittersweet for me, both smiles and tears in abundance. And even more tears now as I read about your baby and his sweater - so, so sweet.  I understand about keeping any little thing that connects us to our angels - at work a couple of days ago I found one single Lee Lee hair.  I cannot tell you how many times my office has been swept and mopped since that last day she was there and yet there it was.  I kept it and put it with the rest of my Lee Lee treasures - I just couldn't bear not to keep it.  And you never can tell, maybe your angel LuluBelle is still sleeping in that box of hers from time to time - I keep Lee Lee's corner of the couch free for her - just in case. Thank you so much Allison for your support, it has been a difficult several days for me, but Lee Lee has been providing many wonderful signs and awesome visits so I'm hanging in there for her.  I pray that you are doing okay and feeling peace in your heart. Many hugs...

Melanie
LeeLeesMama

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Posts: 2,800
 #203 
Lee Lee, my heart...

... with several anniversaries looming in the near future, I have needed your sweet presence so much.  And as always, my Angel you have found a way to show me that you are still nearby.  Leaving a feather for me in my chair that I keep by your "spot" outside ~ I don't always sit there each evening when I visit with you, but on Wednesday after that walk, I just needed to "sit a spell" with you and there it was stuck in the seat of the chair - right where you knew I wouldn't miss it.  And that "up close" visit while I was there from the hummingbird moth - that was special Angel ~ thank you.

... and yesterday seeing you in that beautiful video - Wow! I sure needed that, and that song.. how many Star Trek movies have we watched together? I wish I could beam up to see you my sweet Baby Doll. I miss you so very much, but you know that don't you...

Mama Luvs you err and err Babydoll...
(Kisses for the sugar spot and scratches for the tail bone)

[leeleesun]
Lee Lee laying near her "spot" in the back yard.

(Separated 25 weeks ago today - but 175 days closer to seeing you again My Angel)
RustysMom

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Posts: 1,015
 #204 

 

Dear Melanie ~

My beloved old guy Rusty the kitty (he was almost 22 years old when he left me in 2008) would always curl up on one specific spot of our couch. We finally moved his little kitty bed to the couch so he’d have all the comfort possible. It used to amaze me when our dog Bam Bam (120 pd Bernese Mountain dog) would come running into the kitchen & head right for the couch & his skill & precision were crazy ~ he’d land about 1 inch from where Rusty was snoozing. Never & I mean never did a paw even graze the side of Rusty’s bed. After Rusty left us, Bam Bam continued to jump on to the couch in the same way ~ always managing to spare about 1 inch around the area where Rusty would have sleeping in his bed. I’m probably not exaggerating when I say I think it was easily over a year before Bam Bam put a paw in that area. They (whoever “they” are) say animals don’t remember stuff. Well, newsflash ~ they most certainly do!!! Bam Bam used to look for Rusty on the couch for months. It was heartbreaking.

In regards to LuluBelle’s box . . . I do think her spirit was spending a lot of time in the box because our other kitty Woodstock (Woody) would stand right in front of it & just stare at it ~ for minutes at a time. I think LuluBelle hung around here for a long time. I felt her presence so strongly. I think it was because she wasn’t ready to leave (she was only 7 years old.) This was the place that she knew & loved & I know she just didn’t want to leave. Then we found Picasso (about 2 months after LuluBelle left us, thru our vet’s office,) and I swear, in some magical way, LuluBelle’s spirit is residing w/Picasso. So I still feel LuluBelle, but just in a little bit of a different way. I say that because Picasso does so many similar & specific things that LuluBelle did ~ sometimes kind of freaks me out ~ but more so I’m happy about it because it means that LuluBelle is living on; getting the chance to live a longer earthly life. I also keep the couch “just so” for LuluBelle. She liked to sleep smack dab in the middle of it. So I make sure all the pillows are moved out of the way & it’s nice & neat for her . . . you know, like you said . . . “just in case.”

Hope you have a beautiful day. Big Hugs!

RustysMom Allison ~ mom to Rainbow Bridge angels Rusty, LuluBelle & Bingo ~ mom to furry earth babies Woodstock, Bam Bam & Maybe & Picasso.

LeeLeesMama

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Posts: 2,800
 #205 
Dear Allison,
I always love it when you share stories of your sweet babies, I can almost "see" Bam Bam sailing up on the couch near your dear Rusty and Woody as he was standing there staring at LuluBelle's box.  Yes, I totally agree that they remember, my three dogs that Lee Lee used to eat dinner with still look for her at feeding time. And the three at my Mom's still poke their noses into the car - still looking for her.  I feel bad for them - I don't think they understand why they don't see their friend anymore. 

Whether our babies live 7 years or 22 years, they always leave so many precious memories for us, memories that seem to be engraved in our minds with amazing detail. I find such comfort in reading about all the precious little souls that have enriched the lives of those that loved them so.  I can't wait to meet them all, each and every one, some day - until then I will enjoy getting to know them through the eyes of those they loved so much, like you. 

Thank you so much, I really mean that, for sharing some of your precious memories with me.
I wish you peace...
Melanie


diannblack

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Posts: 70
 #206 
LeeLee's mum, I lost my baby on Friday in a stupid accident. My family just didn't get why I just wanted to curl up and die with her. So I googled pet bereavement and found this site. Over the last few days and nights (I doubt if I have had 3 hours of sleep since she left me) I have been reading about LeeLee's and your bond, thank you just knowing that there were people who understood the true love you can have with a fury friend, has really helped. Im thinking about you, i miss LeeLee to, the photos really show his personality, he's a dog i would have loved to meet. If heaven doesn't reunite us with our fury babies it's not heaven.
I'm sitting here still crying knowing if Liffey were here she would have been within arms reach. I want to reach out and just touch her....
LeeLeesMama

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Posts: 2,800
 #207 
Dear Diann,
Bless your heart, I went and read your other posts - I am so very sorry for your tragic loss of your beloved Liffey, I can tell from your writings just how much she means to you.  I understand how you are hurting and longing for your baby and your sweet comments for my Lee Lee in the midst of your own raw grief mean so much to me.  This is just the worst pain, it hurts so bad, not eating, not sleeping, just wanting to give up, I understand all of it - it just brings you to your knees.  I came here too because I had few people who understood what losing my baby had done to me, she was my world - but here everyone understands, we have all loved and lost our angels.  I would love to hear more about your sweet baby and maybe see a photo if you feel up to it.  Do try to take care of yourself - I know it is hard, but I truly believe we will be reunited with our babies one day. My thoughts and prayers are with you and I'm sending this special (((((HUG)))))) across the ocean to you.

Melanie

diannblack

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Posts: 70
 #208 
Hello Melaine
Thank you for your kind words. I have only a few photos of Liffey one of the funnest things she did was go crazy at the sound of the camera, not the flash just click of the camera. So most of them are her back or her leg or barking but never her smiling face. Her groomer thinks she has a few photos, I hope she can find them. She was a very pretty girl, big black sparkling eyes, and if dogs smiled that is what I always saw. I keep thinking I missed out on so much potential, she never grew up, never grew old. Young dogs are wonderful but we all know that with each year they change and we love the changes. LeeLee looks like a wise old lady with the puppy sparkle still in her eyes. Do you realize that because of your wonderful words about LeeLee she now lives in our hearts too, she is alive now in away that she wasn't when she was with you. You and LeeLee have touched my soul and from what I have read the souls of people all over the world. LeeLee keep shining through, thank you and keep up the good work.
Hugs
Diann
diannblack

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Posts: 70
 #209 
Melanie just after I posted a reply to your message, somewhere over the rainbow started playing at the end of a TV show. I watching the history chanel, it was bizarre, not the sort of song you hear after a show on English history....plus I have no idea when I last heard that song. LeeLee? Liffey? Just angels? Some one was trying to tell me something....what, I have no idea but it lifted my soul to hear it.
danceswithmanypets

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Posts: 842
 #210 
Hello Melanie and  LeeLee,   just wanted to stop in  to let you both know  I am thinking about you both...

LeeLee is such a beautiful soul... and  I do believe she  met up with PeeWee  when she went soaring up to the Rainbow Bridge...  so many beautiful souls  to greet her  there.....

I read the last few messages here   on  LeeLee's page(s)     and  I must say  that  I do believe  that  your friend  Liffey   along with  LeeLee   sent that song  to  comfort   Diane...

the words to that song are quite meaningful....  what a comforting message that is.... on many levels.


Blessings of Peace, Comfort and Healing light

Carrie and angel PeeWee
LeeLeesMama

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Posts: 2,800
 #211 

Diann,

I just want you to know what a blessing your sweet words have been to my aching heart. Just thinking about what you said about her being alive in a way she wasn't before - You made me cry, but I also feel, I don't know, lighter? in a way. Today is her "birthday" and a hard day for me - so thank you for giving me a new perspective. 

And that beautiful song, yes - absolutely a sign from above - from your sweet Liffey and since you were just visiting with me and my girl - I think it means that our babies are together, new friends.  Let it comfort your heart Diann - as your precious little Liffey meant it to.  Thank you so much for sharing that with me :) 

I hope too that your groomer had some photos for you, but, even if not, remember the most important "pictures" are the ones you carry in your heart, those beautiful memories, like the ones you wrote about here, are so very precious - I have quite a few photos like that too. 

Diann, even in the great depths of your grief you have helped me so much...
From a grateful Mama, I send you hugs of understanding and comfort...

Melanie

LeeLeesMama

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 #212 
Dear Carrie,
Your thoughts mean so very much to me Carrie, you have been such a wonderful help to me.  As I said to Diann, today is a hard day for me, but I was able to go to a walk alone this morning, just me and my little Lee Lee, and we found a pretty for her to bring home. All those little signs, like the song that Diann shared, they mean so much to me.

I just know in my heart that those of us who have connected here - our babies have also connected at the bridge and are special friends - at least that is what I believe. And they will all be at Lee Lee's party. 

Special hugs for you today Carrie and for your darling PeeWee,
Melanie


LeeLeesMama

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Posts: 2,800
 #213 

Happy Birthday Lee Lee,

Lee Lee, my little Angel, it is your birthday today, well, I'm not sure it's "really" your birthday because of how you came to be with us. But I wanted you to have a day for your very own so I decided September 1st would be your special day. Even if it is not exact, it's close and I will always remember you on this day. I wonder if the Angels will have your party on your "real" day if it isn't today... Well, anyway, I'm pretending that it is today...

My sweet little Angel, I am wishing for you all the desires of your precious little heart on your First Birthday at the Bridge, you would be 9 years old if you were still here.  I hope you have lots of presents to open, ice cream, all your favorite snacks - cookies, sticks, strips and I'll bet they even have a cup of ice chips for the birthday girl.  

I hope you heard me sing the birthday song for you today and that you sang along as you loved to do - I imagined that I could hear you.  I know you will enjoy being the center of attention today and opening all your presents - I can just see you holding them down with your little feet and ripping the paper off with your teeth, grabbing your prizes, shaking them wildly and racing around with them playing with all your friends.  But knowing you, the most fun for you will be bringing them as pretties to all your guests and prissing around for "show and tell"

Have fun Baby Doll and feel my love, I am thinking of you.. One day I will be there to celebrate all your birthdays with you my little Angel.  I can't wait to see your face when you see me.  Until that day, I will love you, I will miss you and I will ever long to be where you are.

[leeleebday9704]
Lee Lee on her "birthday" last year sleeping in the car on vacation.


Err and Err My Angel, Err and Err - Kisses and scratches Baby Doll,
Mama

ourbrandy

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Posts: 1,000
 #214 
Happy birthday sweet angel Lee Lee.  I hope you are playing and frolicking with Brandy and all your other friends.  Brandy loved to open her presents too.  She would rip open the packaging and that was almost as much fun as the gift.

Wishes for sweet memories for you Melanie as you celebrate your Lee Lee.

Brandy's mom (Barb)
~forever~
MarleyBarley

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Posts: 685
 #215 
Happy Bithday LeeLee.
I hope you are having a fun day. Your momma misses you, terribly, give her a birtday sign. She would be so happy, sweet girl. Say hi to Marley for me. But most of all have a wonderful first birtday at the bridge.
sharkey905

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Posts: 284
 #216 
Happy 9th Birthday LeeLee  I hope you are having a good time on your first birthday at Rainbow bridge..with lots of treats, and friends. Hopefully you can send your Mom a sign today,, I know she needs it
Melanie...Hope you are doing okay today..I am sure it is hard (Rambo's birthday is in Nov,,, and I am dreading it-more so now that I read your post
) I love that you said LeeLee would sing along....I would of loved to hear that....
take care...sorry I dont have much to say today,,,, I have been having a very bad week...
Hugs,
Sue
Rambo's Momma

DarrenS

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Posts: 156
 #217 
Sending you birthday wishes on this very special day LeeLee happy birthday sweet sweet girl, hope your have fun and got all presents you wanted,
If you don't want the wrapping paper My Spencer will happily have it he always found the paper more fun then the presents inside.

My Thoughts and prayers are with you both today.

DarrenS
diannblack

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Posts: 70
 #218 
Happy Birrhday LeeLee. I wish I could touch you, give you a pat. I love dogs.
I slept an hour then.....sadness my mind just, I don't know, one little thing just reminds me how alone I am. I pulled out old photo albums, then went sleep still would come I took to tablets with codeine in them and I got 2 more hours of sleep. My joy, my bundle of bouncy joy is gone. I never thought of her not being here, I don't think you can ever prepare yourself for loss, but it so incredible that my baby who ran for the joy of it on Friday morning was dead 5 minutes later. Today I have to begin the car and drive to town with out her. She loved mornings, sometimes I could tell she didn't want to go....can't we just stay home together mum. But once we were in the car, she loved driving in the car.she new when we were getting to the house were my mother lives with my sister and her family, she would cry with excitement before we turned of the main road. Then it was like a bullet straight up the stairs down the hall and she would bounce all over my 14 year old necie till she was awake, then would bounce off and run to the balcony door and be bouncing up and down like a pogo stick telling people 'open the door open the door'. this is were she would be when I got up the stairs...I was never slow, she was just that fast. Then it would be outside time bouncing all around my mother licking her hands, then it would be Tinks turn, she is an old dog and had no time for this baby who wanted to lick her face. Then it was straight down stairs to the side fence to see if the nice dog was there, he was on Friday I could here her happy cries. Then back up the stairs to watch me make my tea. Then she would great everyone as they got to the breakfast table, perhaps offer them a toy (which could be anything handy). We would stay half an hour then she would get in the car help me put on her car seat harness. Then the quick 5 minutes to my brothers house was just filled with happy anticipation until we got to his street then she would cry with joy. I would open the gate to let her in, which was never easy as she was so ready to be inside already that it was difficult to open the gate. Then she would run to see her best friend Nod, he would run to her head down,ears down tail wagging off and then I would go to work happy.
None of that will happen today....I know I will cry all the way, I know I will have a red face and look stupid today and I will not have Liffey to great me when I finish work...EVER again. Oh my heart is in pieces I'm so alone without my baby. I will be in the house that used be a home alone again tonight...there will be no end to this loss.
Time to get ready for work...
diannblack

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Posts: 70
 #219 
It's hard to type when your crying, I was a mess this morning, and yes I did cry the whole way. I got myself together walked into my office...I got hugs, lots of them. My friends cried for me, they brought me hot chocolates (yes more then one) I got chocolates, more hugs and then an orchid (they knew I had problems watering the orchids i have because Liffey always wanted to be watered too). I went to my sisters place and my 12 year old niece had a memory stick with baby photos of Liffey and even videos. The weekend was hard, but being around friends today helped.
Melanie how was your baby's special day? Did you find a random gift for you? For some reason I think you did...what did you find?
Thinking of you
LeeLeesMama

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Posts: 2,800
 #220 
Thank you all my Mama's friends for the Birthday Wishes.  We had a fantastic time at the party, I got sooooooo many presents and there was a special present for each of my new friends.  Plus all the goodies - YEAH!!! 

~ Miss Carrie, Me and PeeWee had a great time at the party and we laid in the sun for a while after. He says he loves the portrait - it is one of his best sides!

~ And Miss Diann, Liffey came too, she was going wild during the photo session, but we finally got one of everyone together.  She says tell you it is beautiful here.

~ Miss Barb - I had so many presents - Brandy was my assistant "opener" - She is a real pro at opening.  We played and played after - it was great!

~ Marley says "Hi" to you Miss Teresa and she loves you. We had a great time playing with my new frisbee - Marley is better at it than me though.

~ Miss Sue, After the party Rambo and I went and had a good wiggle in the grass and we just laid there for a while - the grass is so soft here and we were so full of snacks.

~ Spencer offered to take care of all the paper, Mr Darren, I was so excited to rip it off, but he took care of it after that - all nicely shredded.

Everyone was there and we all had such a perfect time, we can't wait for the next big party!!!  ALL my new friends send love to their "people".

Thank you again for the Birthday Wishes !!
Love, Lee Lee


(Thank you again everyone I appreciate you remembering my baby, Melanie)



sharkey905

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Posts: 284
 #221 
Thanks LeeLee for your wonderful birthday party. I had a great time and so did everyone else... with lots of treats
Hope everyone can come to my party in Nov
Thanks
Rambo
diannblack

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Posts: 70
 #222 
LeeLee brought us together, Of couse she did invite all our babies to get together too. Thank you LeeLee I'm glad you are keeping a eye in Liffey for me....all my love Liffey's mum
LeeLeesMama

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Posts: 2,800
 #223 
Sue,
I hope you've had a little better day - I know how hard it is - what a roller coaster ride of emotions.  I can't even remember what "normal" felt like anymore - does that sound strange.  My normal now is a constant mental and physical ache.  I totally understand - I am short of words too. I am thinking of you...Melanie

~Rambo - What a sweet Thank You note, looking forward to your party in November - Love, Lee Lee

Diann, 
It brings me comfort, and I hope to you as well, to know that our babies are together with their friends :)  In answer to your question - yesterday I discovered two roses on my dear grandmother's rose bushes (they would not normally be blooming right now - too hot).  And just so you know the significance - her name Lee Lee, came from Rosalee, which came from Rose.  She has a bunch of names...Melanie


diannblack

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Posts: 70
 #224 
I drive on Lee point road every day, today I thought of LeeLee driving down the road. I just knew she would try to easy your pain in some way, I'm realizing what a special soul she is.
sharkey905

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Posts: 284
 #225 

Melanie 
Thanks again for your kind words.. I am not sure why this week has been so hard..
..started the other day when I was walking Bear (the dog we are taking care of for a month or 2)...I saw a black dog in the field where Rambo always played....the dog was wiggling on his back like Rambo used to do,,,,then Bear got neutered Friday,,and Friday evening he was making little noises...just little cries I think he was in a bit of pain..and I totally lost it,,brought me back to "that" night in June.... I know I over reacted cause he was fine... but it just brought back so many memories...then I read your birthday note to Lee Lee and thought about how I am going to get through Rambo's birthday and halloween....
then the neighbourhood kids start school today....Rambo loved seeing them every morning..and they loved seeing and petting him...and now the nights are cooler...Rambo hated the heat...but loved the fall..
And you are right, I dont even remember what normal is anymore....I dont think we ever will again. 
Hope you have a good day,
Sue
Rambo's Momma

sharkey905

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Posts: 284
 #226 
Melanie
another thing that started the bad few days... when I leave the house for work or shopping or whatever I always say good bye to Rambo in his little urn and tell him where I am going and how long I will be or how long till his Daddy comes home...ya, I know,, I am nuts.....well the other day, with having to walk Bear before I left for work, and trying to get everything ready,, I forgot to say good bye to him.....Got almost to work before I remembered...omg....you think it was the end of the world...well, to me it is...I almost turned around and came back home ..
Sue
diannblack

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Posts: 70
 #227 
I felt guilty because for the first time since she left me I forgot her, just for a moment, I was watching TV on her couch. When I shaped back to reality I realized I was on the couch alone....in a couple of hours I have to go way for work for a few days. I'm looking forward to it because being in this house is just torture. I find myself staring at the places she should be, looking at the corner of the hall where she would appear running after she had been outside. I remember only last Thursday when she was asleep on the arm of the couch near my hand and I touched her soft little head ever so softly so I would wake her, I was in awe of how cute she was lying there asleep.
The urn is not your baby, he's not there which is why you didn't feel him when you walked past, he's now everywhere an nowhere forgive yourself it's OK. I don't want moments when Liffey is not for most in my mind because they will make me feel disloyal but I loved my Dad and I now don't think about him every second of the day now either it doesn't mean I don't miss him.
I brought a lotto ticket today, then I wish I hadn't, I don't want a million dollars I want my baby.
I'm so sorry for you, its just not right or fair to feel such pain, get a locket with a photo or put photos tucked in your wallet or bag and then you have something to touch with you that is your baby....try to forget the urn thats too sad and represent his death not his life.
Love
Diann
LeeLeesMama

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Posts: 2,800
 #228 
Diann,
You are so thoughtful to share that with me today - someone half way around the world thought of my little baby - Thank you!  I hope you have a good day and that your memories of Liffey are bringing you comfort... 
Hugs, Melanie


~~~~~~~~


Sue, 
I so completely understand - I am so, so sorry.  I have my little "rituals" too - different from what they were when she was here, but they help me feel "close" to her or "connected" somehow.  One thing I do every evening is to visit her "spot" where she is now (I can't even say the "b" word today).  I bring her a flower (I picked a huge bouquet of wild flowers for her birthday) and some kind of "pretty" a leaf, a stick - something.  I lay my hand there, where her little face would be, for a few moments and I tell her how much I miss her and that I love her "so much".  I am bawling now just typing it.  I've already thought about our vacation in October when I can't go there - what will I do??  Oh Sue, I do feel for you - I hope we will find some peace one day.
 
Hugs of understanding my friend, and I don't think you are nuts...
Melanie 


ourbrandy

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Posts: 1,000
 #229 
Hi Melanie - How are you doing today?  When you said you have your rituals, so do we.  Every night before we go to bed we visit "Brandy's tree" - the little evergreen we planted in our backyard with a plaque for her.  I talk to her and tell her how much we love and miss her.  Then when we are in bed we both say "Goodnight Brandy."  I hope she can hear us.  She always slept with us, ever since the first night we got her at 8 weeks old.  17 years of feeling a furry little body next to you.  It's just so hard now.

We are also going on vacation in October to western North Carolina which we love very much.  It's such a peaceful place with all the mountains and creeks.  Two years ago we rented a house in North Carolina for a month in October and Brandy went with us.  She was 15 at the time and did very well for the long car ride and being so far away from home.  It will be bittersweet this time to be without her, but I know she is in our hearts and will always remain there.  We will say goodnight to her from there also.

Wishing you a day of beautiful memories of your precious Lee Lee -

Brandy's mom (Barb)
~forever~
sharkey905

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Posts: 284
 #230 
Melanie
Ya, the rituals do make us feel closer to our babies, dont they... I know its something I will do every day for the rest of my life
I am sure while you are on vacation,, you can still say good night and talk to her while you are away to let her know you are thinking of her..and you could bring a candle to light every night in place of visiting her,
I hope you have a good day,
Rambo's Momma
Sue
LeeLeesMama

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Posts: 2,800
 #231 
Barb,
You are so very sweet to check on me - it means a lot.  These last few days have been rough - too many anniversaries, too close together you know.  We have to find some little things to keep them "near" don't we - I love your idea of an evergreen tree, what a great way to pay tribute to an everlasting love.  

We will be in Tennessee, in the Smokies - we go there most every year and she loved it so much - it will be so hard to go without her.  But as you said about your precious Brandy, our Lee Lee will be with us - in our hearts - I like to think of her being able to go (in spirit) on all the "dog free" trails and in all the stores where she wasn't allowed before  :) 

Thank you again Barb for checking on me - what about you, are you getting along okay? - I know it is so hard without your sweet girl.  I do hope you have a safe and pleasant trip, maybe the leaves will be pretty while you are there.

Hugs to you
Melanie
LeeLeesMama

Registered:
Posts: 2,800
 #232 
Sue, 
Sorry if I sounded freaked out - I'm just not looking so forward to this trip.  As I told Barb, we are going to the Smokies that Lee Lee loved so much - it is where we went on our honeymoon and this will be 20 years for us so we must go.  But it will be hard to be in all her favorite places without her.  I know she will be there in spirit and who knows - that will probably be a lot more fun for her - no restrictions!  

What a fantastic idea the candle is Sue, I am so glad you thought of it, I LOVE IT.  I am going to get a special one to take, just for this 1st trip, I'm getting all misty eyed just thinking about it.  Thank you so much for mentioning it. And I'll still talk to her too - I know that she can "hear" me no matter where I am.  Thank you - this helps.  I hope your day is peaceful also with many sweet memories of your baby.   

Hugs
Melanie
LeeLeesMama

Registered:
Posts: 2,800
 #233 
My Dearest Little Lee Lee,

Six months ago today, in the early hours before dawn, you had to leave me - I miss you so much I can hardly stand it.  I remember so, so many times going over to where you slept, and leaning down to you "Mama loves you soooooo much" I'd say, smoothing back your beautiful ears against your head, kissing the sugar spot, taking your precious little foot in my hand and laying my face against you - you smelled so good I'd just drink in your scent, I couldn't get enough of you. And as if it were just seconds ago, I remember very vividly thinking..... "I love you too much"

My heart felt as if it would just burst with all the love I had for you, it actually frightened me at times - depth of my love for you.  A love not expecting anything in return, a helpless love, a love always growing, a love that will never diminish or fade - love in its purest form - just because you are you.  And now along with my love for you, there is such deep, devastating, unrelenting grief - I never knew it was possible to hurt this much, to miss another soul this much and still be walking this earth.  My heart and mind are filled to overflowing with so much wonderful love and so much horrible grief at the same time - I am not sure how that is possible, I only know that it is so...

I love you and I miss you so much, my little Angel, my precious Baby - these few words can't do it justice.  I have so many wonderful memories of you Lee Lee...

you bringing me those beautiful pretties, talking and prissing
your precious smile, your wonderful smell
going for walks - you always found something new to enjoy
playing chase, tug of war, hide n seek, and when you'd try to catch my legs
watching you chase squirrels - everything else was forgotten when you saw a squirrel
riding in the car with the window down
sitting in my lap all curled up with your face tucked under my arm
hearing you singing those wonderful songs
watching you bathing your feet
watching you as you'd dream - making those cute little "buff" sounds, your feet going
your excitement when you'd hear "Do you want to go...?"
laying in the sun, wiggling, pushing, such simple pleasures...
and that big contented sigh that meant all was well with you - that is all that I ever wanted...

These are what I have now - my undying love for you, a few pieces of a broken heart and my sweet precious memories...

[leelee13]

Until we meet again my sweet little Angel, Mama luvs you err and err, kisses and scratches....wait for me just over the bridge - and have a pretty ready, I promise I won't be late.

(Separated six months today, 26 weeks and 2 days, - but, 184 days closer to seeing you again my Angel)




ourbrandy

Registered:
Posts: 1,000
 #234 
Oh, Melanie - what a love that you and Lee Lee shared.  You have so many precious memories of a life well lived with her.  I can totally relate to how you feel.  I never knew such a love was possible.  Sure I love my husband, my children and grandchildren, but this love for our angels is like no other.

I guess that's because their love is so unconditional, they don't criticize or judge.  They only love with all their hearts and souls and make us feel like we are the most important people on earth.

Wishing you all the hugs I have for your precious Lee Lee and you - may you take comfort in knowing that others care.

Brandy's mom (Barb)
~forever~
Mare

Registered:
Posts: 11,060
 #235 
Belated birthday wishes to sweet Lee Lee and happy six month bridge day.  She is such a pretty girl and I know how hard life is without her.  There are some days yet when I would give anything to have my bunny boy back with me.  Our fur babies are such wonderful blessings and will be missed until the end of time.

Mare-wolf
precious Christoph ~ always my sweet bunny boy ~
sharkey905

Registered:
Posts: 284
 #236 
Happy 6th month bridgeday LeeLee

Melanie
Had a very bad day at work today,,,(of course,its Sunday again, Rambo left us on a Sunday and I hate Sundays now) but I  just wanted  to let you know I was thinking of you at times through the day,,knowing it was LeeLee's 6th month bridgeday anniversary and hoping you are doing okay 
Sue,
Rambo's Momma
LeeLeesMama

Registered:
Posts: 2,800
 #237 
Dear Barb,
What a blessing you are to me, just you saying what you did about your family - so many people think I'm a total nut for loving "a dog" this much. I am married, but don't have children to compare it to, but I can't imagine I'd love them any more that I do Lee Lee, she was my baby.

Thank you for the hugs and your lovely words, it means a lot to me.
Wishing you peace,
Melanie

~~~~~~

Dear Mare Wolf,
Thank you so much for the Birthday and Bridge Day wishes for my angel. (Lee Lee says thank you too)  You are so very right - our angels will be missed until we see them again.  Seeing that your precious Christoph is always remembered, even after all these years and reading your kind words has helped me so much.

Melanie

~~~~~~

Dear Sue,
Thank you so much - it is so very hard, isn't it, Friday is my most hated day now, but it seems every day of the week has from horrible memory attached to it now. This six month mark has been particularly hard for me for some reason, I have been just stuck like a broken record, playing things over and over in my mind.  I appreciate so much you thinking of me and my angel - I know that you are struggling too and missing your precious Rambo.  My thoughts are with you also - I hope you have a better day today...

Hugs to you and wishes for peace,
Melanie

SharG

Registered:
Posts: 533
 #238 
Dear Melanie, I love reading this thread and hearing about your memories and rituals. How loved LeeLee is and always will be. I know how much I miss my boys and how everyday small things remind me of them. And I WANT to be reminded, I want to believe with all my heart that their love and energy still lives here with me.

Now, I'm making new routines and memories with Sebastian - I know my bridge babies sent him to me to make me laugh and smile as he does things which remind me of them, makes me cry too but that's OK.

Sharon
diannblack

Registered:
Posts: 70
 #239 
I had a wonderful furry friend Scully before I had Liffey, she died the same way as Liffey in 2009. I wasn't the best friend to Scully I often had to leave her with family for long stretches I promised her I would be a better owner to Liffey and I was. Liffey really had a fun filled life, I took her everywhere and the longest she was ever alone was 3 hours...till now.
I realized I never forgave myself for failing Scully. I couldn't even look at photos of her, I even had my favorite framed photo in my spare room. Not any more, I have 2 dog photos near my bed now....I feel grief for both, but I'm glad I can look at Scully's photos again. A new furry friend is like another child, never a replacement but a chance to do things better. I'm not sure if I could ever have another furry friend, my pain is too raw and I don't think I would stop worrying that I would lose that furry friend too. How do people cope losing more than one dog in a lifetime? The pain is killing me. Just knowing I have a greater chance of outliving any new friend is too sad to contemplate. I think I will stick to enjoying the company of other people's pets.
Diann
MarleyBarley

Registered:
Posts: 685
 #240 
Dear Melanie,
I imagine LeeLee with a wagging tail and a bright dog smile, saying it's been only 6 months, mom. We're ok, you and I, I see you and all you do each day. I'm still there with you, you just can't see me. I'm happy here, I feel great and I know we will be together again before you know it. But most of all remember that I love you, forever and a day.

Remember, Melanie, you taught me to see that it's 6 months closer to the time we see our angels again.

Teresa,
Marleys mom
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