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RustysMom

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Posts: 1,015
 #1 

Dear Friends,

 

Today marks day 100 since my Rusty left me for his eternal life at the Rainbow Bridge. As many of you, I also recently lost my other best friend, my mom on May 14, 2008. I have read many posts over the last couple of weeks and I find that my heart is breaking so terribly, not only from my own loss, but for everyone else’s as well.  I wish I could write to each and every one of you, to let you know you’re in my thoughts and if I could I’d make the pain and sorrow go away, I surely would.

 

I’m posting a poem I wrote for Rusty a day or two after he left me and I will share it now with all of you, my dear friends.

 

For you Rusty, my sweet little guy . . . I love and miss you so.

 

Until We Meet Again . . . . My Beautiful Boy, My Life, Mine

 

How do we go on without the ones we love?

Time doesn’t stop, we keep marching on,

We are just hoping they’re watching us from the heavens above.

 

When it was your time, I held you so tight,

Loving you, kissing you.

I wished you peace and no pain as your spirit took flight.

 

I pray each day that I’ll see you in my dreams to ease my pain,

My sorrow, a wound so deep,

Come to me my love and tell me you’re o.k. and that it’s time to be happy again.

 

You’ll remind me that when you left me you took my tender love with you in your heart,

And tucked it safely away,

And though you didn’t want to, you knew we had to part.

 

Now when the sun rises I know it’s your sweet spirit asking me to smile,

To find joy in my lost soul, my broken heart,

But it’s so hard to do, you understand don’t you, it’s going to take a while.

 

As you left, you said to me, “I know how much you love me, what more could I ask for?

Thank you for giving me this gift by setting me free,

And now I’ve been called back because someone needs me more.

 

I have you in my heart and will always now for eternity, don’t fret,

To carry me across the heavens,

So do not worry, for I will never forget.”

 

But the emptiness that’s left behind, as I sit alone and cry,

To know that you’ve gone before me,

I asked when you left me, who needs you more than I?

 

Come whisper softly to me, on the wind and let me know you’re near.

It will be so unexpected, not to be explained,

Tell me where to find you, I’ll look for you there.

 

I know you’ll be waiting for me when it’s my time,

I will never know peace until that day when

We’ll be joined together once again my love, my beautiful boy, my life, mine.

 

ajb - 2008

Georgeann

Registered:
Posts: 2,245
 #2 
Dearest Allison:
The tears are streaming down my face as your poem to Rusty is so beautiful.  I could have written every word.  Christopher has been gone over 14 months, but the pain feels as if he left yesterday.  I know that you feel the same.  The waves of grief hit like a tsunami-there is no warning and no way to prepare.  Your words are so true:

"I will never know peace until that day when

We’ll be joined together once again my love, my beautiful boy, my life, mine."

 

I will always count every day until Christopher and I are together again Forever.  I know that Rusty and Christopher are together and safe at the Bridge, but that simply does not ease the pain.  I do not think anything ever will until they are in our arms Forever. 

 

As Always, you and Rusty are in my Prayers.

 

Happy 100 Day Bridge Day Precious Rusty.  Please Stay Safe For Your Mommy And Let Her Know That You Are OK.  Please Take Good Care Of Christopher For Me And Make Him Mind.  Some Day We Will All Be Together Again-I Promise.

 

Big Hugs

Georgeann and Christopher

Forever

 

 


Benniesmom

Registered:
Posts: 95
 #3 
What a beautiful poem. It's like you have read everyones mind. Thank you for sharing it during your time of grief.

I have found much solace here.

God bless

NinaMariasMom

Registered:
Posts: 567
 #4 
Rustysmom,

What an absolutely beautiful poem, it brought tears to my eyes.  What a wonderful tribute to Rusty.   I'm sorry for your loss of Rusty and so, so sorry for your recent loss of your mother.   I can't imagine going through two losses.   Thank you for sharing your poem.

You will be in my prayers,
Nina Maria's Mom
MaxsMom

Registered:
Posts: 258
 #5 
Dear Allison,

Oh, what a beautiful poem to your precious Rusty!  Your words are so poignant and true.  Your boy was very lucky to have you, as you were him.  Allison, I am so very sorry for the loss of your Mom.  My heart goes out to you as you go through this very sad time.  I think that when we suffer such losses, our hearts open up in a way that makes them very tender, and we feel things so sharply...other people's pain as well as our own.  We have to be extra gentle with ourselves at these times, doing things that nurture us.  Please be good to yourself, and take special care.  You are in my thoughts and prayers.

Happy 100 Day Bridge Day sweet Rusty! I am sure that you are a blessing to all of your little friends at the Bridge, just as you were in your Mama's life.  Please send your peace and love to your Mama's heart, to fortify and soothe it.
 
Hugs and warm wishes ~
Joanne ~ MaxsMom

 
Gruntsmomforever

Registered:
Posts: 699
 #6 
Dear Allison,

Oh what a beautiful and touching poem for your Beloved Rusty!!  Every verse speaks so truly and eloquently of your love for your baby boy, and how deeply his loss has hurt you.  And then, to lose your Mom....I am so sorry.

Thank you for sharing this special piece that you wrote for Rusty with us.  It is an honor.

Hugs,
Katharine, Grunt's Mom Forever


 
RustysMom

Registered:
Posts: 1,015
 #7 

Dear Friends –

 

Thank you for taking the time to read my poem. It’s in the sharing of those words that makes the time passage and the loneliness I feel, a little less hard on my weary heart.

 

Dear Georganne –

Thank you so much for your reply. I know we’ve “met” through these posts over the last several months, and every time I read Christopher’s story, I just cry. Your continued love and devotion are so strong. I know that your Christopher, while not with you in the physical sense that you crave, he is with you. When a person like you has such pure love in their hearts, I believe that person is never alone. Christopher feels your love, he is forever connected to you and I hope that you feel that . . . because I’m sure he wants you to know that the two of you are still very much together within your hearts. But I also know that our lives will only know true peace when we are united with our babies again. Many warm hugs today and always Georganne. Thank you again.

 

Dear Benniesmom –

I know your loss is so very new and raw and I appreciate you taking the time to read my post. I know how hard it is to read and share when your own heart is breaking. I know that your baby Bennie loves you and is so grateful for all you did for him. It’s the hardest decision we have to make when we send our babies to the Rainbow Bridge and all of us here understand that heartache. Please know that I’m thinking of you and sending you a warm hug. Thanks again.

 

Dear NinaMariasMom –

Your kind words touch my heart and I want to thank you for taking the time to read my post and my poem to Rusty. At times, my losses seem like too much to bear, but coming here and having the support of people like you continue to help me see my way through it all. With much warmth and affection, thanks again.

 

Dear Joanne –

Oh my dear friend, thank you so much for your reply. You’re so right; our hearts are more open in ways that make them so very tender – vulnerable too. I have always felt as if I take on other people’s pain, which is why I haven’t been able to reply to so many posts – it becomes all too intense. I appreciate your words . . . “be extra gentle . . .” I want to take those words to heart and mind and try to do that, but sometimes it’s hard to push the sadness away – my heart always seems to win out over my mind. But I will try, if for nothing else I believe it’s what my Rusty would want from me. He was always so happy, full of such brightness and joy, and I honor him by carrying on in my life the way he did in his life with me. Thanks again Joanne . . . you and Max are always in my thoughts.

 

Dear Katherine –

You are so kind, always saying such sweet and thoughtful words. Your support means so much to me and I can’t thank you enough for taking the time to read my post and reply. I know how much you miss your sweet little Grunt and I wish there was something more I could say or do to help ease our sorrow. Please know I’m thinking of you and sending you a big hug! Thanks again.

MrMeowgy

Registered:
Posts: 763
 #8 
Dear Allison, I just don't know what to say. I am so very sorry for the loss of your darling Rusty and your beloved Mom. Your poem to Rusty broke my heart. Words are not coming to me easily but I want you to know I understand your deep, deep sorrow. Both my parents are gone too. For many years now. They were both sick for a long time.  I still feel like an orphan though. I can't believe the sadness I am feeling over the loss of my beloved Mr. Meowgy. Thank you for writing the beautiful poem to baby Rusty. You put into words what is in my heart. It has been 82 days since my boy left so I will be marking 100 days soon. 100 days, God, it must be so hard. I know how much you miss your little boy and now your Mom.  Your Dad, your Mom and your doll Rusty are together now watching over you. Try to think of it that way. I hope it gets easier in time but I don't think it will. Depressing I know but right now that is how I feel. I'm sorry for the rambling but your post blew my mind. I wish you peace and comfort from the bottom of my heart.
Happy 100th BridgeDay dear Rusty! Please watch over Mr. Meowgy for me.
Donna, Mr. Meowgy's mom
Tweenys_Ma

Registered:
Posts: 847
 #9 
Dear Rusty's Forever Mom,

Your beautiful poem really tugged at my heart, you really summed it up for just about all of us.  I loved all the lines, but this one really resonates with me: 

I have you in my heart and will always now for eternity, don't fret,
To carry me across the heavens,

So do not worry, for I will never forget.”


This is just so hard. It helps to know that they can now be with us in ways they couldn't before.  But the true glory is when we will join them again in that eternity across the heavens together.


This is strange, but I also wrote a poem for Tweeny at 100 days.  It was on the old Petloss board but I reposted it under Kelsey Len's thread "The Poem That Never Ends".  When I saw your thread I thought, gosh maybe we're related somehow as your mother departed the day before my late mother's birthday, and I also have a Rusty. Well we all do have a common bond.

 

Sending you and Rusty much love at the 101 days now at the bridge for your precious boy.

Love always, Tweeny's Anna
RustysMom

Registered:
Posts: 1,015
 #10 

 

Dear Donna –

Thank you so very much for the kind words and your reply. I remember when I lost Rusty how I longed to go to my mom and tell her and lay my head in her lap and have her stroke my hair like she used to do when I was younger. But I couldn’t bring myself to tell her – I didn’t want her to see me so sad and distraught, because I knew it would cause her great pain as well. But when I think about it now, I realize I probably didn’t give her enough credit to her strength, as she demonstrated that strength time and time again during her illness . . . so I missed an opportunity with her and I regret that. Donna I know how much you continue to grieve for your sweet MrMeowgy and I sincerely appreciate you taking the time to connect with me. I’m sure our sweet guys are watching over us all the time. Much affection.

 

 

 

 

 

Dear Anna –

I am a firm believer that people come into our lives and cross our paths for very specific reasons. I don’t try to figure out the reasons, because that would probably drive me crazy – it’s in the knowing that I have had this wonderful opportunity to meet someone that I know will have such a positive impact in my life, like the people here at PL – people like you. Our serendipitous events warm my heart and I suspect that we are indeed related, at the very least through Rusty & Tweeny – our beloved babies. Many warm hugs and much thanks for all of your wonderful posts and support Anna – they have all helped in ways I can’t even begin to describe.

 

 

Again, thanks everyone.

 

Peace to all.

 

Rusty’s Mom – Allison

alexjlulu@gmail.com

JerryC

Registered:
Posts: 1,569
 #11 
Allison;
The poem was beautiful and as you know I lost my Peaches a week ago but your poem brought the tears back but that's ok, as I said before they will never go away just subside after time. Such a beautiful dog. I still have two dogs, who miss Peaches. One is a beagle, Pokey and the other is a German Shepard Noah. Spending more time with them is helping me get through my despair. I had I guess put them on hold during my time of grief, no a good thing to do and I feel bad about that. I need to reassure them that they are still both deeply loved. For who knows what tomorrow may bring. Jerry
mssavion

Registered:
Posts: 613
 #12 

Dear Allison, oh, how my heart aches for you, two devastating losses in such a short time. Your lovely tribute to your beloved Rusty brought tears to my eyes, very beautiful words indeed.   I know these upcoming days will not be easy for you as your mourn your mother and your fur baby, know that we are here for you, and feel your pain.  Hugs from Houston,  Nikes's Mom,  Jan

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