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Lynnsa

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Posts: 63
 #1 
And I'm still in bits. Most days I'm in tears over him its just a.wful. my life is not the same and never will be. I keep getting told it will be better after a year but I just don't know. I miss him so much
skmk

Registered:
Posts: 93
 #2 
Lynnsa. I'm so sorry for your loss and I know just how you feel. Our lives will never be the same and somehow we are supposed to get used to the new normal. It's very hard when our fur babies are taken suddenly and you're not expecting it. My little boy Dickens went to the vet for some inflammation in his neck and was put on Prednisone. Five days later he was dead. He was dehydrated, anemic and his liver and spleen were swelled up. His immune system was destroying his red blood cells. At home he wasnt acting like he was deathly ill. He was a little off his food which I attributed to the Prednisone upsetting his stomach. He was also somewhat lethargic which I also attributed to the Prednisone.
I told the vet what was happening and told him I was going to cut the Prednisone dose in half. He said ok do that. The next day Dickens seemed better with a little more energy and appetite. But the next morning he was very lethargic. I took him right in to the vets. They tried rehydrating him first. I went home and a few hours later they called to say he had died. I'll never forget that phone call. They suspected some kind of fast moving cancer. Now I beat myself up daily and think what if I had brought
him to the vet a couple days sooner. But I tell myself what he had was something deadly. Who knows if he could have been saved . He might have had to go through all sorts of treatments and surgery and still have the same outcome. I will never know and that is my burden. He's been gone a little over two months and was ,13 years and 5 months old. He was my heart dog. I miss him every day. The point of my story is that you can bring a dog to the vet for something non life threatening and you can still lose them. I never expected him to die that day and was completely shocked. Sometimes it's better for them to go quickly but it's very hard on the one left behind.
Dickens was a happy active lovable dog pretty much up to the end. I am thankful for that. Take all the time you need to grieve. There is no set time table.
And know you are not alone and I understand and empathize with you as do all the people on this site.
Sorry my post is so long. I have found reading up on grief and seeing a counselor is helpful.
Wishing you peace. Take care of yourself.
Skmk
Lynnsa

Registered:
Posts: 63
 #3 
Thank you so much for your kind words Skmk and I am so sorry for your loss of Dickens. Our stories are quite similar as not for one minute did I think Max was dying and it comes as such a shock as you know. I keep going over the what ifs as Max was running round just the day before. I know deep down it was his time to go but it's just so difficult for us left behind. I know time will help but I seem to take two steps forwards and one back. Bless you and take care xxx
cosesmom

Registered:
Posts: 580
 #4 
Please give yourself time. I lost my Sweet Termy a year ago to marrow and I still shed tears everyday and I know I will never be healed. I miss him with all my heart, everyday. There is no set time to feel better, take all the time you need. I too read up on grief and I am seeing a counselor to help with my feelings. Believe in your journey and the memories you made and hold tight to the love you shared.
Love and doggie hugs
Termy's mom
Lynnsa

Registered:
Posts: 63
 #5 
Cosesmom thank you for your kind words. It’s so hard isn’t it? I’m sorry for your loss of Termy and completely understand that you are still in tears daily as am I. I too feel that my life will never be the same again and Max has taken a huge part of my heart with him. I’m still in shock that he has gone all this time later - not everybody understands how I feel so I like to come on this site to realise it’s not just me feeling so wretched. Love and hugs to you and once again thank you xxx

Max’s Mum
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