Registered: 1197839779 Posts: 1,328
I have 3 pets, as some of you might know. They all have health problems. I won't bore you with the details, but diabetes, DKA,uveitis, glaucoma, corneal ulcer, megacolon, kidney failure, liver cancer(?) and diarrhea, wt. loss etc. have been regular words in my vocabulary for longer than I can remember! We lost our little calico in January due to kidney failure.
I'm just so tired lately--bone tired--not just regular tired. They have so many problems with their health and are on so many meds, foods, etc. somedays I don't know if I have it in me much longer to do this. Did anyone experience this when caring for their sick pet? Or pets? I've always been the type to "do the right thing," but lately I question this part of myself. My husband even looks older every day, like it's getting to him bad. Am I putting him through all of this to preserve their lives, but at the expense of my husband and I's sanity?? I love my animals--more than words can say--they have always been priority number 1, but its' so da*n hard. Some days, I just feel like driving and driving far away--maybe out of this hot desert lately! Anyone have any tidbits of wisdom to offer? Thanks in advance. Maybe I just need to vent, I don't know.
Registered: 1194654202 Posts: 881
I only had my Cicio who needed to be fed at 5 a.m. and 5 p.m. every single day so I could give insulin....she had other problems as well throughout her life but the last year was a constant watch..she was also urinating ourside the box so I was constantly cleaning up and she had 2 crises where she was on IV's for an entire week. Lots of meds as well. It was extremely exhausting and I really couldn't go anywhere or do anything other than work. I can't even imagine how exhausted you are with 3. I don't have any answers for you but I totally understand and your health must come first. Perhaps it's a matter of considering quality of life issues for your furkids as well as the medical. And just pray on it. You'll know what to do. And...frankly...you don't even have to drive out into the desert...it's horridly hot here no matter where you step out!!!! Donna
Registered: 1193533588 Posts: 991
I understand the feeling of being that tired. During the last 3 years of Molly's life, it was a constant thing: give meds, eat, force feed water to keep her bladder cleaned out(typical schnauzer with bladder problems), out to potty every two hours. Every time the vet gave her a new med, I felt just downright overwhelmed. And trying to keep up with her med schedule fell to me; I don't think my hubby could have done it if he had been home to do it.
Overwhelmed. I wasn't tired; I was overwhelmed. And every setback with her seemed like a personal attack on my ability to keep her well and happy.
But let me mention all the love I was able to give my Miss Moll and her devotion to us. That got me through the feeling overwhelmed and the disappointments that followed too closely on the heels of hope for her health.
I can't advise you on a course for you. I only know how I felt.
Registered: 1208508336 Posts: 820
I understand the frustration and tiredness of caring for a sick cat. Rupert was on kidney medication for 14 months and then there was the special food I had to feed him and he wouldn't eat it. I found the last few months so difficult because he wouldn't eat the kidney diet and used to steal his sisters food. At the time I was looking after my three kids and my Mum who has cancer and sometimes life got so tiring. To have 3 sick cats must be very difficult. It was also sad for me as I was just trying to keep Rupert alive and knew soon I was going to lose him. That was the hardest part knowing his days were numbered. I was grieving from the time of his diagnosis. Maybe some of your tiredness is grieving too. Just a guess maybe. You want to to the best for your fur friends. Keep going. Ruperts Mum
Registered: 1174967373 Posts: 282
Nancee, I can relate. Ive been caring for Bella for 4 months. And everytime someone says oh she isn't happy blah blah blah, the vet clinic reassures me no she is happy. She's a happy content little girl and the main reason why she has been fighting this is because of me. (As I am writing this I can see her snoozing on her bed.) I would say to make some time, if possible, for you. Even it is 10 minutes of just time for you. And remember, your babies love you. Taking care of a differently abled animal is just as tiring as taking care of a differently abled person, and the rewards and love are just as great. Louise
Registered: 1198872932 Posts: 1,205
I have no words of wisdom for you, I can only tell you that I know how you feel. It does take it out of you to be caring for others, human or fur. Is there any way that you could just make a little space for yourself and your husband. It is not selfish, we all need time out. Thinking of you, Love Di xxx
Registered: 1197839779 Posts: 1,328
Thanks for your replies. They're all doing pretty good lately. It's been extremely hot so they're taking alot of naps and rests lately. I hope it remains a quiet summer.
Registered: 1211860763 Posts: 139
It is never easy taking caring for a sick furbaby. The time spent on making sure they eat, get their meds, get their rest, etc. I remember that some meds my girl had to eat first and some were to be taken on an empty stomach. Such an exhausting schedule but the worst part of all was watching the sickness progress. Some days, I too wanted to just go off far away and forget that my baby was ill. Maybe a little vacation would be good for you and your husband if you know someone that you can trust to care for the animals. Its sound like from your last post that things are a little easier and I hope that continues for you. My thoughts are with you and all your furbabies.
Registered: 1194492978 Posts: 5,100
When Betsy began her steep decline, I was so overwhelmed I had to get away for a few days. We took her to the vet's and they watched over her so carefully and lovingly while we went away for a long weekend. It helped me so much. I was able to "think" more clearly about her situation when I was away, and felt less stressed when I returned.
If you can get away a few days, please treat yourself and your husband. It is so worth it, and you deserve the break. I hope you can find someone to watch over your babies. Many hugs from someone who has walked in your shoes, Melissa
Registered: 1210358895 Posts: 24
What you're experiencing is a very normal reaction to dealing with stress and anxiety. Most of us who have cared for an ill loved one over the long term have felt this way. What is your support system like? Is there someone who could take over some of the responsibilities- if even for one day a week. Self care also becomes important - making time to do something nice and pleasurable for yourself - even if only for a half an hour daily. Try and structure this time in - I know from experience that it's very easy to get caught up in caring for others and before you know it, days done and you've not had any time... And know that you are loved by those you care for. Best wishes, Nila
Registered: 1205715660 Posts: 763
Dear Nancee, You have your hands full, no wonder you are tired! You are a saint and doing a super job of caring for all your furbabies! I know what you are talking about. My beloved Mr. Meowgy was diabetic and needed insulin twice a day. That was no problem, as he was the best little patient ever. What a doll that boy was. (is). Now I am left with 5 females, not nearly as friendly as my boy was. I miss that. Anyway, they all hate each other. The older 2 hate the younger 3 and the other way around. I spend my whole day keeping them separated and I change them from room to room (so they have different things to look at) I know, I'm crazy. 5 litter boxes to change, not leaving a grain of litter on the floor,sanitizing ALL those food dishes everyday. You get the picture. I get no help because they are MY cats.
One day it dawned on me that they didn't have to be moved around every 12 hours on the dot. It won't kill anyone to step on a grain of litter. Just running ALL the dishes under really hot water is good enough once in a while. If I linger a little longer at the store or make an extra stop somewhere, everyone will survive. I know your babies are sick, but is there something in your routine that you can make easier? Everything doesn't have to be perfect. Have you thought of having a pet sitting service come in for a day or 2 so you and your husband can get away? Most services have very qualified people on staff. You just need to see something different and think of something different. Even for a day or 2. Make an extra stop before going home or go to a movie. Sometimes I just sit in the car in the driveway for a few minutes to regroup after work. When I feel refreshed I go in. Nancee your darlings know how much you love them and they will understand if you take a little time for yourself. You have to, you deserve it and we all need it. You are doing a wonderful job--be proud of yourself. Best wishes, Donna, Mr. Meowgy's mom
Registered: 1197839779 Posts: 1,328
Thanks everybody--I appreciate all of your kind, helpful words. They
definitely help. We're going to get away in September and are leaving the diabetic in the Vet Hospital, the youngest (almost 14) in the Kennel attached to the Vet Hospital and the dog (if she makes it this long--almost 15 1/2 and a husky!) at the "Country Club" (a kennel w/indoor/outdoor runs). We used a pet sitter a few yrs. ago when Puffy and Mindy weren't too sick,but Puffy is gone and Mindy needs meds 2/day and SQ's 2/week some weeks. The last time I left Bootsie at the Vet Hospital (this was in the spring for 4 nites, I had to go somewhere for an appt.)they couldn't believe the number of eye gtts. he was getting. The one vet said to me "It's all day long." I said "Yup, it is." The corneal ulcer did heal though after 2-2 1/2 months. The other vet said it probably wouldn't. I guess Bootsie is still fighting the odds. The eye vet said his eye looked good. I was quite shocked actually. (I get so used to bad news I don't know how to act when good news arrives). Ya, things don't have to be "perfect," I keep reminding myself of that--these animals are all accustomed to being, frankly, over-indulged or as my husband says "spoiled rotten." They meow, I run, they hiccup, I run, they sneeze, I run. Good thing I didn't have children--I think they would have become neurotic with me peering over them 24/7. I didn't realize they'd all get sick at once. When they're babies, you just don't see it. And, you don't really know if they're gonna get alot of illnesses or not. Anyways, I love these guys so much.
Registered: 1205715660 Posts: 763
Nancee, I laughed when I read your post. I'm glad you are getting away for a while. I hope you and your husband have a fabulous time. You deserve it! We do tend to spoil our babies (human and pet). I guess that's what makes us "Mommys"! Best wishes, Donna, Mr. Meowgy's mom
Registered: 1214276794 Posts: 5
Dear Nancee, You are absolutely amazing for all you do for your fur babies. They are very lucky to have you and your husband as pet parents. I've been down this road before, but only with one pet at a time and it was draining. I'm glad that you're taking some time for yourself and finding the best possible place for everyone to stay while you're gone. I'm sure that they'll be in good hands and you will get some very much needed relaxation. Hang in there and know that someone upstairs is looking out for you! :-) Regards, Bonnie