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kittiekat

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Posts: 215
 #1 

To all of you who have been such a comfort to me since Thursday and are suffering the same pains, doubts, guilt's and fears, I wanted to share an excerpt of a book that I have been reading.  The book is titled, "Surviving the Heartbreak of Choosing Death for Your Pet."  The author is Linda M. Peterson.  The book is wonderful and I am learning much from reading it.  Chapter 20 is titled, "A Meditation For The End Of Your Pet's Life."  The meditation begins with you going to a library and finding your pet's lifebook on the shelf.  You pull it down to read it.  Ms. Peterson goes on to walk you through the process of when you first met your beloved pet until the end.  Finally, you come to the end of your pet's life, you turn the page and there are no more pictures, just writing.  Your beloved pet has written some thoughts......

The following is from Ms. Peterson's book, Page 151 - 152:

"Dear Human Friend,

I want you to understand that I have lived my life, and it is now drawing to it's close.  My life span is shorter than a human's.  I am sad about that reality.  But I accept it, and want you to accept it.  I hope you can let go and give me permission to die as I approach the end of my life.  Whether you choose euthanasia to end my suffering, or let death come at it's own time, I want you to know that an animal does not fear death as some humans do.  Death is a natural event which I accept.

I have held on to my life as long as possible because of my worry about how you will get along without me.  But, because you have learned to care so well for me, I have faith that you will find a way to care for yourself when my physical presence is no longer there to comfort you.  I know that my spirit and the memory of our few brief years together will remain with you to strengthen you in the hard times that are ahead when the two of us must part.

I want you to share this final experience with me to the extent that you can let yourself.  I don't ask for a longer life, or medical miracle.  I know when you do the medical tests and treatments, you do them to keep me with you.  So I put up with them - to stay with you longer.  But I could do without all the medical fuss.  All I really want, as I am dying, is for you to be with me and lovingly comfort me.  That is one of the last pictures I want in this lifebook - the two of us sharing this final experience as I prepare to go to the land of the spirit at Rainbow Bridge where I will wait for you.

I want you to find companionship to fill the time we two have always spent together.  We both know another pet will never measure up to me.  But I understand your need for an animal companion.  So, in time, I will send another animal friend who needs your love and care and a new lifebook will be started....But not just yet.  For now, seek out human friends.  Connect with the best in these humans as you share your grief with those who understand what it is like for one left behind after the death of a pet.

I have left the final page of this lifebook empty for a picture of you my beloved owner.  I will have accomplished my mission if that final picture shows you taking care of yourself as well as you have always cared for me.  Remember me and celebrate my life, and our lives together.  But do not cling to the past.  Embrace life.  Explore new directions to focus your life, and search out new loving relationships after I leave you.  In doing so, you will best honor my memory.  And I will be at peace."

Hopefully the moderators will allow this to be posted as I have credited the author and her book.  The book really is outstanding.

Finally, a thoughtful prayer for your beloved pets.  This prayer comes from Unity Village, "Not One is Forgotten:"

"You are a beloved creation of God, and I release you into God's loving care."

I hope all of you sleep well tonight.  Thank you for getting me through this terribly difficult weekend.  My prayers will be with all of you for your comfort and peace.

Kittiekat (Smokey and Samantha's mom)

sweetpepe

Registered:
Posts: 143
 #2 
Thank you for sharing that.

I am in tears again.  Sometimes I wonder if I should come here as I always cry but then I believe I need to cry.  And here is safe and people understand.

I do keep busy and I have friends who are pet lovers too, but I don't always talk about Pepe as I think that would get to be tiresome even for good friends.

I know I can always come here when I want to spend some special time remembering my dear Pepe and shed some tears in his memory.  
Mary

Registered:
Posts: 1,400
 #3 
Thank you from the bottom of my heart for sending that chapter in the book.  I can not stop the tears.  I will love my sweet Meister forever and I feel the pain will never stop.  I wish I could give my love to every pet who needs it but at this point I just can't.  It is with my Meister.

I thank you again for sharing this with us.  I know someday it will be how I feel about losing Meister.

Mary
Meister Mom
kittiekat

Registered:
Posts: 215
 #4 
Hi there,

I'm glad that the post helped both of you.  The book really is good.  I, like sweetpepe would find myself holding it together for about an hour, come back and read more and start crying.  But it helps to read how others are working their way through this terrible time.  Candles tonight.

Marsha
lograham

Registered:
Posts: 418
 #5 

Kittiekat - That is so awesome and just what I needed right now, nearly 8 months after losing my Rugrat and a day after trying to save a little kitten after he was hit by a vehicle.  He wasn't even mind but I know my Rugrat lead me down that road to find him and take care of his remains after his little angel soul went to the bridge.  THANK YOU

mw0263

Registered:
Posts: 139
 #6 
Dear Kittiekat,

Thank you so much for the post.  You will never know how much this one post means to me.  I've believed that my Comet stayed with me as long as she did for me.  Reading this really hits home and brings such comfort.  I think when I leave this site today I look the book up online and try to purchase it.

Thanks again for taking the time to share something so wonderful.

Margaret
Nuggetsmum

Registered:
Posts: 251
 #7 
Oh Marsha,

That is just wonderful and brings me so much comfort...I still have so much guilt, but to read this brings me so much comfort...

xx
polkadots

Registered:
Posts: 117
 #8 
kittiekat-

God bless you for sharing this. it made me teary-eyed with smiles.

much love and light

Pat (Daisy's forever daddy)

I love you Daize! Daddy still misses you so much....
JerryC

Registered:
Posts: 1,569
 #9 
Thanks for sharing that. And indeed the memory of Peaches has helped me many times. As I approach our two month anniversary of our journey to the vet so she could make her final journey, the pain and sorrow is not so easy to put away. I know as many here do that, that is how it is and always will be on those anniversary days and we will have to deal with it on our own terms. My way is to try and remember the good times we had with Peaches and to be thankful for the nine years we shared. I know many caring people here have answered my stories about her and have said "How lucky she was to have had us for parents" and I thank them for that, however in all reality it was us who were so lucky to have had her in our family. God Bless You.---Jerry in Oklahoma.
 
                                                         FOR PEACHES
                                                         05-21-2008
kittiekat

Registered:
Posts: 215
 #10 
Hi all, I'm so glad that the letter is helpful to you.  The book is excellent, especially if you are dealing with guilt issues or wondering about the timing, etc.  I read the book after I PTS Sammy, and had to read it again for Smokey.  I just picked up Smokey's ashes today and to see them is pure heartache.  I know he wasn't well, but gosh I miss him so much!

Thank you for letting me know that the post was helpful.

Peace and God Bless!

Marsha
imissmyLou

Registered:
Posts: 23
 #11 
Thanks a lot for sharing.  I am in a river of tears but it brought comfort to my paining heart.   I love u  & miss u loU!

~d Louie's mom
jrinphx

Registered:
Posts: 1,355
 #12 

Thanks for sharing this.  I PTS my beloved son Alex yesterday and when I saw this, I immediately ordered it online.  Hopefully it will help ease some of my pain and sorrow.  JoAnn - Kina and Alex's mom

kittiekat

Registered:
Posts: 215
 #13 
JoAnn,

I am so sorry about Alex.  He's on a wonderful journey and you will be with him again.  As so many on this site have said to me, ask him for a sign to let you know he is okay, and believe that you will receive that sign.  Open your heart and let Alex's love flow through.

I know that the book will be a comfort to you.  God Bless and comfort you.

Marsha
Luna13

Registered:
Posts: 846
 #14 
Oh goodness.  Here come the tears again.  That's so beautiful - thank you for sharing that!  I truly believe with all my heart that my girls are in a beautiful place.  They are also with me always, everywhere I go, and will be in my heart forever.

God Bless,
Gerlie (Gypsy and Luna's forever mom)
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