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Bubba1

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Posts: 1
 #1 
On Saturday, our amazing English Bulldog of 10 1/2 years died suddenly of a heart attack and I’m just completely devastated. I knew this day would come eventually as he was getting older but I just thought I’d get to say goodbye differently - one last hug, cuddle, really good meal, etc. Instead, I rushed out of the house to get my hair cut for the first time in a year without even a pet and got a call from my husband on the way home telling me to meet him at the emergency vet with our daughter. Did he even know how much I loved him on that last day or did he feel alone and forgotten?

I just can’t stop crying since it happened. He was my constant shadow and my “soulmate” dog. He just had so much love to give. Everything about our house reminds me of him because he was such an important part of our family for so long. I just can’t imagine never cuddling up with him again. I can’t bear to sit down on our couch as he would instantly be cuddled up against me.

On top of this, I’m 16 weeks pregnant so my emotions are already going crazy. I also have a 2 year old at home who keeps asking about Bubba. I just can’t picture our family without him, and that our kids won’t remember how amazing he was.

I wouldn’t trade even one second of my time with him, but gosh, this is so hard :(
Jwarner90

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Posts: 6
 #2 
I’m so sorry to hear about the passing of your English Bulldog. My French Bulldog passed a little over a week ago in a drowning accident and I’m still a mess. My advice to you is that it will get better. Time has partially healed my wounds and it will be the same for you. I am 8 months pregnant and had to stay strong for the baby inside me. On that horrible day, I honestly thought I was going to go into preterm labor, but I held myself together. You need to do the same. Take some time to mourn the loss of your fur baby, and maybe do something special to remember his life (funeral, trip with family, etc). I would also recommend eventually opening your home to a new pet, especially for your 2 year old. I know how quiet a house can be without a pet running around. Take care of yourself.
Eriksfurrbabies

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Posts: 24
 #3 
Sorry for your loss. He knows exactly just how much you loved him. Don't ever doubt that, our fur babies know exactly how much we love them, it's the love they give back to us. The cuddles on the couch prove that.

Don't shut yourself of from the memories, however sad they make you right now, you'll notice with a bit of time those memories will make you happy again. You'll get a smile back on your face when you remember all the antics your fur baby made, and yes, the sadness will come with them but it will lessen to a bearable level.

You let your kids know just how funny he was and how loving, and it will do you good remembering him that way. I had to put one of my babies to sleep last Friday and it hurts terribly but I keep forcing myself to remember how happy she made me, how many times she made me smile and feel the love she gave me. It lessens the pain a bit, and I keep looking at her picture telling her how my day went and how much I loved her.

Keep strong, and know that in time you will smile again when you think of him.

Erik,
Nani and Nikki's dad

KatKat

Registered:
Posts: 171
 #4 
I'm sorry for the loss of your beautiful boy.  Our pets become one of the family and the loss leaves such a hole in our lives.  I do not doubt for one minute that your boy knew how much you loved him, it's obvious from your writing and your grief.  Please do not beat yourself up for rushing out of the home, we all do that because our lives are busy.   No one can foresee the future.  There is no way that you knew this would happen.  Please keep reaching out, this message board has helped me, I lost my kitten through a tragic error on my part and time in combination with the support of others here has been the reason that I am not crying every day and am beginning to heal.
cyberghostx13

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Posts: 445
 #5 
Well I am so very sorry for your loss of your beloved soulmate. There isn't any time that's good for losing a loved one, none whatsoever. It's super hard to deal with. However, you must focus on your baby about to be born and try very, very hard to be positive and to reduce stress as much as possible for your baby's sake. If the weather permits get out of the house as much as possible. I wish you well. CG13.
MyLittleOneIsGone

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Posts: 131
 #6 
Dear Bubba1,

Please accept my condolences for your beloved Bubba. Saying goodbye when they are old and it's time, is hard enough, but not getting to say goodbye is horrible. I didn't get to say goodbye to my 6-year old dog. He passed unexpectedly, too. It leaves such an empty place in your heart. I often wondered if my dog also felt I loved him and if he felt I abandoned him the day I lost him. I was haunted by this for a while. 

Cry and grieve as much and as long as you need to. It's okay as long as you keep yourself healthy. 

I haven't started any memorial and it's been almost 6 months. His ashes are still in a cabinet which I do not open. I'm not ready yet, after all this time. It may take you a while, too. Everyone is different. There are no rules for our grief. This forum is a good place to express your feelings. Everyone understands. 

Wishing you comfort, peace, and wonderful memories of your sweet Bubba.

~ Parker's Mom
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