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Posts: 2
My 17year old Max died this past Wednesday. He brought me such joy for all those years and I keep looking in the window when I come home expecting to see him waiting for me like always. He had diarreah on and off the past 6mths which always cleared up after a day or two and the vet said it happens in older cats. This past weekend in started but he was eating and drinking normally and always made it to litter box on time. My other cat became very ill and needed my attention a bit more. I called the vet Mon for Max and they couldnt see him till Thurs. Tuesday afternoon he stopped eating an was drinking a lot of water. He wouldnt lay on the bed with me like normal and was laying under the bed all the time. I called the vet Wed crying and they made room for me, I hurriedly put him in his carrier and raced over there. He meowed the whole way. He was only 4.5lbs and I knew it was time to end his suffering. My beautiful Max died before she could find a vein for the injection. Did it make it worse for him when the other cat needed more attention? Did I miss something? Did he think I didn't love him because of the other cat and that's why he stayed under the bed? I miss him so much and keep telling him how much I loved him, but I cant stop thinking he thought I didn't love him or I should have seen more signs and this is mu fault.

Posts: 32

I am so sorry for your loss. I am going through the exact same grief and guilt and pain and questions. I walked away from my best friend and told him that I would be right back and when I came back he was gone. Forever. In a violent death that he suffered all alone without me there to save him or even be there with him. No matter what I do, I cannot stop wondering what he was thinking in his final moments. My mom told me animals don't have the type of thought process to where he would be wondering why I wasn't there or thinking that I didn't love him. I wish that were true but I really don't know about anything anymore

Just know you're not alone.

Posts: 2

First, so sorry for your loss of your best friend. My mother said the same thing to me and I don't know if I can believe that, that is when I found this forum, to here others stories (heartbreaking each one) from true pet lovers, to try and find some answers.

Thank you for responding, it is comforting to have others to talk this through.

Posts: 377
I'm so sorry for the loss of your baby boy Max.. :( it always makes me so sad reading stories everyday of our fur-babies passing away, thinking to myself why does these happen.. Could they just be with us more time? it's something that I think nobody is able to explain but I think is something normal in life. But it just hurts so much that we cannot accept but I wish something like these just ends. I completely understand how you are feeling I also lost my kitty and event-though its been a while it's still hurts. And I will never forgive myself for what happen I also think that my kitties where mad at me for not being there for them might think that I didn't loved them.

Sometimes we just have other things to handle to that it's just hard to handle everything at once, now in your case you had 2 cats to care for and one for of them needed your attention for a while because he was sick. but that doesn't mean that you didn't love the other one because you did so I think that your little max know that. Now for ot being that night in your bed and being underneath your bed it could of just been that he wasn't feeling well and he just needed to be alone for a moment. I think that cats also need some time alone even-though they love their owners, especially the age yours was old age. Please don't think it's your fault that your baby is now gone and you though you fail him because honestly you didn't.

Look what you were trying to do for him you immediately rush him to the vet just to have him checked out, so he could be ok.. eventhough you kind of knew that your cats life was coming to an end, you were right there with him giving him your love and support. Of course that he knew you loved him that is what is called a parent that loves. You will be in my thoughts and prayers I hope that sometime when your heart is ready your grief will become good and wonderful  memories of your lovely max.

~ Mayra (Princess & Blanca's mom)

Posts: 389

A couple of days ago I had my little black cat Salem put down.  I only had her a little over 2 years.  I found her as an abandoned cat and gave her a home.  She adjusted to me and my other 3 cats and my cats and I adjusted to her.  She was a bit of a high maintenance girl and had some bad habits that she had to let go of.  She was an in & outdoor cat but towards the end of her time with me she preferred to stay inside.  She was a wonderful little feisty girl and I was and still am very attached to her.

I have gone through grief before and I know that it will get better and the sadness will lift and that life will go on.
The memories of her are sweet but bitter-sweet because I only have memories now and not my sweet Salem.

I still expect to see her in some of her favorite places.  She loved to eat and I couldn't even be in the kitchen without her being there looking up at me.  I miss her doing that.  I just start sobbing.  This is so very hard.

I know that taking her to the vet and having her put down was the right thing to do and I did it for her because she was suffering.  When I took her in though I thought that maybe the vet would tell me something we could do to save her and make her okay again.  But he told me that was not a good idea and there was just too much wrong.  It was very hard to leave his office with an empty pet carrier.

My sympathy to all who are also going through this grief.

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