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GinaXOXO

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Posts: 28
 #1 
I've got to go to the office tomorrow.  I think I mentioned that I normally work from home.  We have our own business.  So, prior to transitioning to working from home I went to the office, and Jasmine went with me every day.  She sat in a big picture window and would watch the customers.  She knew exactly when they'd be done outside and then she'd hop down on the desk where the customers sign or if she were especially brazen she'd sit in the customer chair.  When she was still a baby she had a baby playpen because I was worried she'd get stepped on.  She was so little.  I'll try to post a picture.

And, the customers were so sweet to her.  Most of the indulged her.  Probably 95% of my customers are men.  And, I gotta tell you they are big softies.  That still surprises me.  

I was going to go tonight so I could be alone and get myself settled.  I should have.  I've given myself a migraine.  

She really added so much to my (our) life.  I never saw her as a burden.  She was such a pleaser and I think she figured out quickly what she could, and couldn't do.  Our family was so blessed.

Often putting it all into words here has helped me.  Not tonight.  Ugh.  
GinaXOXO

Registered:
Posts: 28
 #2 
Oh, yeah, and one more crummy thing about going there ... that is where I was when the vet gave me the bad news and told me to come quick because it wasn't looking good.  Also, as I left I saw a jacket that I had her lay on that had her paw prints on.  So, there's that too.  I told my husband about the jacket.  We've been each other's rock.  Maybe he got it out of there.  :(  

I'm fine / I'm not fine    

I'm on a teeter tooter tonight.
Heidi4907

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Posts: 39
 #3 
I also feel that going through this so emotionally exhausting. There are so many "firsts", that hurt beyond the first time. It sounds like Jasmine had lots of fans at your office, of course, because she was adorable. But what a hard day for you, having to tell people who ask where she is, and try to get work done. Things like your jacket story really hit me too. Coco was always on the desk when I sat at the computer. Some of his hairs are still here. So many things like that. Now I'm sobbing again. Yes, "I'm fine / I'm not fine" makes sense to me too. Like "I Can't Go On, I'll Go On" -Samuel Beckett.
I hope some of your customers were comforting, and I must say your husband sounds great.
-Heidi
cmartin04

Registered:
Posts: 73
 #4 
I know your pain. I dred waking up each day because its another day Anna won't be with me

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