Registered: 1518362927 Posts: 4
I’m so torn,
My dog Riley will be 10 in the 23rd and he has a lot of issues. I’ve been able to manage his separation anxiety for 8 years with Prozac until last week.
He is very fearful of strangers and will not allow but one or two people to touch him. Note he has bitten twice now (people who just couldn’t resist touching him anyway).
This issue has closed his and my world so tightly that I’m having to come to the realization this is definitely not a good place for either of us. He’s basically very healthy and happy but this anxiety rearing it’s ugly head is truly making his world even smaller. We have upped his meds but now I can not leave the dog door open while I’m at work since he started digging at the gates. He has started chewing at the door frame, pawing and scratching at the door and window shredding the blinds. There are more reasons to let him go then to keep trying but the pain and Guilt are tearing me up. I just put my Golden down 6 months ago due to cancer.
I’m so broken, I Love him so much but I don’t think I keep him and others safe anymore.
This is truly the hardest thing the ever faced.
The Pain, Guilt and Grief are beyond measure.
Registered: 1498611382 Posts: 580
I wish there were something that we could do help our babies when life is a really scary place for them without us by their sides. I can see that you love him so very much and how badly you want to hold onto him after losing your Golden so soon. If his quality of life is suffering and there isn't anymore you can do for Riley it's a hard decision for you to make. Please understand that only you can know when to let go. I know the guilt is something that is so very hard. I was torn apart when I decided to let My Termy go. I did the what if and maybe I should have but in the end I know I did what was best for him. He was over 16 years old and I so wanted to have him with me longer but that would have been selfish of me. You need to do what is best for Riley. There is something deep going on with Riley. Oh, if only they could talk. You have my support, love and understanding during this time in your life.
Love and doggie hugs Termy's mom
Registered: 1518245506 Posts: 13
I am so sorry to hear of the decision you are having to make Naturegirl61. I hope you are able to read some of the stories on this website to help with your decision. There are some very comforting people here too. I made that dreaded decision in way too much haste 2-2-18. The pain is horrible and I miss my girl so much. Be sure you think about it as much as you need to and know in your heart what is best. Good luck to you and love to your Riley.
Registered: 1517499255 Posts: 60
I'm sorry you're dealing with such challenging issues. I know this might not be affordable, but have you tried hiring an animal trainer or psychologist (I don't know what they're called) to work with Riley?
If I were in your situation, I'd be worried about Riley biting another person and causing harm (serious or not), and the person suing you, Riley being confined by the police, or both. That would be traumatic for both of you. One of my coworkers was bitten by her family's dog a few months ago. The dog bit her face, during the night while she was sleeping. She is fortunate that the damage wasn't worse. She and her husband decided to have the dog euthanized. I know that it was not an easy decision for them but they were worried that the dog might bite one of their children. She said she'd never forgive herself if that happened.
Registered: 1517249701 Posts: 8
Oh sweetie I’m so sorry you are going through this. Separation anxiety is so hard to fix. And it’s so hard to see them having so much anxiety. You left the sweetest response about my Sweet Pea and I’m so grateful for that. Ultimately I had to look at P’s quality of life. She was in pain, became untrusting of the only dog she EVER trusted to begin with. She had to be put up when friends same over which crushed me because she LOVED her people friends. But I could risk her getting upset over attention and it was easier to distract her in another room than Slevin.
I know it’s not easy. Believe me, it took me 2 weeks to make this decision, to see my situation declining, and i cried over her and with her every morning and every night. I was heartbroken. I still am. I reached out to trainers I trusted and explained my situation and felt comfortable with what my options were, which were limited. And going the other route still wasn’t a guarantee. But I couldn’t emotionally handle another fight or worse injuries. I have beautiful memories of her now. I couldn’t risk more injuries and having that be the last memories of her. I think about her every day and I miss her so much. She was so goofy and so sweet and so loyal. She wasn’t very vocal but her eyes were just so telling. She loved me and she loved her life. I don’t know what happened in the mean time but something had changed. Whether it was Slevins mini seizures or her arthritis pain at an all time high, I don’t know. Slevins quality of life ultimately was more than hers. I hated her being alone, she would’ve hated that life too. And bring leash reactive and aggressive, I couldn’t take her to work wth me. She didn’t want to walk as much, she just wanted to be left alone. And that had to have been her way of telling me. But I miss her so much. I want to run my fingers through her soft long coat. I want to kiss her forehead. I want her to come and lay next to me no matter where I am. I want her to show off her tricks she was so proud of (she could shake wth all 4 paws!)
My sweet baby had lived the best life she could. And a longer life just wasn’t meant for her. I miss her so so much. My good girl P 🌸
Registered: 1517249701 Posts: 8
I wrote a long reply, I hope it shows up