Registered: 1586088717 Posts: 2
I lost my dearest friend on Thursday , I feel it so acutely now with being home with her 100% of the time in the last 3 weeks.
My beautiful girl was 14.5 years old . Since January she has been having re occuring bouts of Pancreatitis ( once a month ) and her blood sugar was impossible to control. She lost her eye in January still not sure how. Last Friday she had a seizure first ever and took her to the vet and they told me she had pancreatitis again . She spent 3 days in hospital came home and ate one day the next two she ate sparingly and was up all night - uncontrollable peeing . ON thursday morning by beautiful baby started to seizure again and I made the call to the vet and they advised me it was time and to bring her in and they would allow me to be with her even despite the COVID-19 distance rules . Her body was small , her ears were bruised and I could not bear to see her suffer . I would have done anything if I thought it would extend her life and she could be healthy again. She wasn't eating , she loved to eat , she wouldn't go on walks it was too painful I cried tuesday as I worked and she climbed on my lap to comfort me . At that point I felt she was holding on for me , last week she got up one morning and did something she normally does not do and she climbed on my pillow and laid beside me and had her paw on my face and I pet her and she puppy kissed me -- perhaps that was her goodbye? I keep reading posts on all the meds that were sent home with their pets and imaging tests - none of these were offered to me , did I do her wrong.?? I took her to 3 different Vets due to emergencies , Did I do it too soon , should I have waited another week to see if she would pull thru ? How do you know when it is time .. The Vet told me smy puppy would let me know .. She was so sick and tired that day ,, How could she let me know ? She wanted me to hold her and I did . I would have done anything for her.. I didn't know how to keep her comfortable , she couldn't tell me if she was in pain , I hope I spared her a long and painful death and that my beautiful friend is comfortable , pain free and at peace and forgives me for taking her to the vet one last time . I take some solace that for her there are NO more needles every day , eating as many treats as she like as often as she wants to , I pray that I can see her again some day . How does one ever know if they made the right decision? I didnt want to play god and I am second guessing my decision.
Registered: 1573669513 Posts: 16
I still wonder if I made the decision to euthanize my baby boy Pumpkin too soon or too late. We will never know. I never did notice any obvious sign that he wanted me to release him from his pain, though some people are certain that pets tell their owners. It’s impossible to know since we have no way of directly speaking to our pets about their wishes. At some point though, I decided I needed to forgive myself for the decision I made because there’s no way of knowing if it was the right one. No matter what, I know my Pumpkin loved me until his very last breath. That’s something I hold onto. It sounds like your beautiful girl loved you deeply also. Please never forget that. Thank you for sharing your story. Take care in these lonely times.