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Pet Loss Grief Support Message Board
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Posts: 69
You were full of life and energy and a bit over the top excited the day you left, which has me so full of questions as to what REALLy happened to you that day.  I have never seen a person or a dog so full of life , just drop dead, you were still so young, so full of life.    I remember looking into your eyes as you lay there on the ground motionless,  and wondering if you could see me calling your name or hear me crying please, don't go.   Your eyes were open but, you lay there motionless, and I was helpless to help you.  I see your beautiful brown eyes every morning when I wake up, as I relive those moments.  And again I see your eyes before I go to bed.  I see them just staring into mine, and I am so so sorry that I couldn't save you baby girl.  I didn't know how.  I didn't know you were sick.  You hid it so well.  I wonder if you saw me or if you were just gone.  I hope you know how much you meant to me and how much I miss you and it hurts.   Whereever you are,  I hope you see the words I've written in the stars of how much I loved you, how much I wish you were still here.  If you could here my voice , I would let you know how wonderful you are.  Zeus and I were playing ball  in the field , and you were just there with us , always trying to get to the ball before him, always trying to be 1st. I also you remember you breaking your down stay and running in between my legs when you felt you had been waiting long enough, and you decided it was your turn.   You wanted every turn to be your turn.  You would make it difficult for me to walk as you would keep that postition while I was heeling Zeus.   You were so driven and competetive.     Yesterday,  he wore out much faster than usual, probably because it's just us playing now.  It's been so strange adjusting to this new real.  I don't know if I ever will adjust, or maybe I just don't want to. You were just a one of a kind , special girl,  no one can ever replace you.  
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