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Teesoo

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Posts: 4
 #1 
Hi everyone.

Last Friday, our little Russian Dwarf Bobbi died. I came home from work and found her lyimg twitching in the bottom of her cage. My children and I held her for a while, but shortly after that she died. I've been struggling since then to come to terms with it. My three teenage children are coping much better than me.
I miss her and the funny little things she used to do so much. It was so nice on an evening to spend a little bit of time with her when she was up and about, with her nibbling food out of my hand or running up my arms. I'm finding it heartbreaking to think that isn't going to happen anymore.
I keep beating myself up thinking that there might have been some clue that I missed that she wasn't well, and that if we'd spotted it and taken her to a vet she might still be with us. She was about 20 months old when she died and we had her for 18 of those.
She was loved and she will be sorely missed.

RIP little Bobbi.

Any words to help at this time would be greatly appreciated. I knew she was not going to live forever and that I would be upset when she was gone, but this has hit me harder than I thought it would.

Many thanks

Trevor

Squeakers

Registered:
Posts: 21
 #2 
I was shocked that the loss of my sweet cat Lola was much harder than anticipated, and I knew it wasn't going to be easy.  I've been working hard at not beating myself up and reminding myself that I loved her dearly and did the best I could.  I also held a memorial with my partner and our 3 young boys.  

Be well.  
NucleoWolf

Registered:
Posts: 7
 #3 
Hi Trevor, I am so sorry for the loss of your hamster Bobbi. I lost both of my gerbils Amethyst and Mayflower 10 years ago so I know what it is like to lose a beloved rodent pet. Let yourself grieve and cry for as long as you need to (I grieved over my gerbils for months) and don't be ashamed of it - losing a beloved rodent pet hurts just as much as losing a beloved pet from any other species and you have every right to grieve. Being on this site and talking to people like me who are also experiencing pet loss grief (I just lost my dachshund Hershey a week ago) may be of some comfort because it lets you know that you are not alone during this difficult time. You can also talk to people in real life about your pet if you are up for it, but choose who you talk to carefully because not everyone is so sympathetic over the lose of a rodent pet (sad but true). On that note, never listen to anyone who tells you that "it was just a hamster" that can easily be replaced; you know deep in your heart that Bobbi was a unique little hamster and a cherished member of your family who can never be replaced. If you haven't done so already, then I recommend holding a little funeral for Bobbi as you bury her in a special spot, and create a memorial of her afterwards. Put a picture of your hamster in a frame, and if you have enough photos, then you might want to create a scrapbook (I planned on doing this for my gerbils... but never got around to it...). One thing that I always find helpful in dealing with pet loss grief is wearing a locket with a photo of the deceased pet, because the locket will always keep your pet close to your heart (there are also memorial lockets for key-chains if you don't like to wear necklace jewelry - it might not have the same symbolism of keeping your pet close to your heart, but it will still have the symbolism of always keeping your pet close to you). If you have a creative side, then try to create art and/or writings about your pet (I drew pictures of my gerbils and wrote a poem for them around Christmas). If you have other surviving pets, then try to focus on caring for them; they still need you and may also be struggling with the loss. I hope that this helps, and once again I am so sorry for the loss of your little Bobbi.
katimari

Registered:
Posts: 4
 #4 
Hi Teesoo,
   I just lost my little Russian Dwarf Luna so I know exactly how you feel.  Hamsters are little joy-bringers and they leave a huge hole when they are gone.  I've owned so many and I just wanted to reassure you that there is nothing to feel guilty about.  When they get sick they go downhill quickly and as she was older a lot of times there isn't much you can do for them.  It is so nice that you were able to hold her and say good-bye to her.  What makes me feel better is thinking of the wonderful life we gave them.  Hugs to you.

Kate
Teesoo

Registered:
Posts: 4
 #5 
Thank you for the kind messages. It means a lot and it's comforting to receive support from people who have been through the same thing. Not everyone understands.

We buried Bobbi in the garden and planted something there.

My heart goes out to those who have lost their beloved pets.

Best wishes

Trevor



Teesoo

Registered:
Posts: 4
 #6 
Thank you for the kind messages. It means a lot and it's comforting to receive support from people who have been through the same thing. Not everyone understands.

We buried Bobbi in the garden and planted something there.

My heart goes out to those who have lost their beloved pets.

Best wishes

Trevor



katimari

Registered:
Posts: 4
 #7 
Hi Teesoo,
  I know exactly what you mean.  People sometimes don't understand how important hamsters become to those of us who love them.  I had a hard day today, I watched video from my Luna's last day and I could see clearly how sick she was, it's like I couldn't see it when she was alive.  She was trying to be her sweet little self, trying so hard.  Oh I miss her and I know you miss your ham too.  Love to you.
Teesoo

Registered:
Posts: 4
 #8 

Hi Kate,

 

My thoughts are with you.  I’ve been beating myself up over the past few days wondering if there was some sign that Bobbi was ill that I missed.  The only thing that I noticed was that she had started to bite me sometimes over the past few weeks.  She had not done that since we first brought her home.  I didn’t think anything of it at the time, but now wonder if it was a sign that she was not well.

 

It is clear that you thought the world of little Luna and gave her a loving home, and both of your lives were enriched by the love you showed her.

 

Best wishes.

 

Trevor

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