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Marisa8780

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Posts: 11
 #1 
Last night I had to put down my 11 year old American Eskimo because he had a mass on his abdomen and was internally bleeding. I’ve had so many dogs throughout my life but my parents usually went with them when they were euthanized. So last night was the first time I went with my dog and it was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. A week ago he was perfectly fine and then this week he started going down hill. I thought it was maybe anxiety from all the fireworks we had so I brought him to the vet Tuesday night and the Dr prescribed him anti anxiety medication but that didn’t work, from there he started getting worse. His gums were white, he was so lethargic he just wasn’t himself. Then yesterday I bring him to the vet for blood work and his anemia levels were extremely low. She recommended I take him to the emergency vet hospital. As we were driving to the hospital Leo was just laying there, struggling with breathing and his tongue was turning blue. Once we got there they did an ultrasound and they found a mass but the damage was already done. They recommend euthanasia and I knew that my poor baby was already gone. Saying goodbye was horrible. He kept looking at me, I wonder if he knew I was saying goodbye to him. I’m heartbroken. I can’t stop crying. I just keep picturing him looking at me and our last moments together. I don’t know how I’m gonna get through this. My house feels empty without his presence. I’m just devastated and broken.
MossimoLove

Registered:
Posts: 54
 #2 
marisa8780
im so sorry for your loss. i know how hard it is to navigate this difficult time. grief is a powerful and important journey of our healing and a testament to the deep of love you share.  it has no instructions, we just go at our own pace.  your love is so apparent and im so sorry you had to experience this loss in such a sudden manner.  please know that my heart is with you and i understand how hard it is to adjust to this new reality.  

please take this time to be gentle with yourself, grieve as deeply as you need too. the love you have with your boy is not gone, it has just changed form. sending you comfort and ease. 

take care,
mossimo's mom
anastacia
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