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Karla21

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Posts: 2
 #1 
     Our little Princess had to go to sleep a week ago last week and that has been the hardest thing I've experienced in my life. Sure, we've lost loved ones along the way, but my little kitty was the pride and joy in my life. My husband and I don't have children yet so we always say she completed our little family of three. We love her more than anything and we miss her terribly and it just hurts so bad. I never knew a human person could feel this much pain, it feels as if it could just consume you, that is how great it is.
     The first couple of days I literally could not control myself nor stop crying, the tears were automatically pouring out and my heart just aches. Coming home to an empty household is so difficult because I know she is not going to be waiting for us when we walk in. Literally everything in our home reminds me of her because she loved to get into everything, climb or lay on everything or explore things. There is not one thing here she did not touch. I'm having to stay out of my home as much as possible because I can't handle being here. Its getting better but I cry at least once a day now, what helps is that I have tons and tons of pictures and videos, so I look through them and just smile and crack up at the silly things she did in them.
     Princess was honestly my best friend. When I was home, she was literally with me every second. She would be sitting next to me, climbing all over my laptop, schoolbooks, laying on top of me, playing with me, meowing for me to pet her or just being the wild little baby she was. Whenever I knew I had to be away from home for more than a couple of hours, I always came home for at least a bit to spend time with her, that's how much I cared about her. Her presence was so powerful which is why our home is so empty and cold almost. My husband even said that our home has this strange feeling.
     I believe what hurts most is the circumstances to her becoming ill. She had a couple of shots and the next day she began having trouble breathing, the following day is when we had to say goodbye to her. The vet said it could not possibly be the shots but rather she had fluid in her lungs. What's puzzling is that the day before the shots she was perfectly fine and then all of a sudden, we lose her. I can't seem to wrap my mind around it, but I guess at this point, it doesn't make a difference as she is gone and knowing what exactly happened won't bring her back to us.
     I take comfort in knowing that although I was unable to hold her as she was leaving us, I was telling her how much we loved her while I was waiting for the vet to open that morning. The night before, something made me lay down on the floor next  to her as she was having trouble breathing and I just let her know that she was our baby, we love her, we wanted her to get better but if she did not feel strong enough to keep fighting, I would understand, I just wanted what was best for her. I told her everything I needed to instead of just going to bed. So, although she might have been afraid that I couldn't be with her during the day nor properly say goodbye at that last moment (she was on oxygen all day, when the vet called us to put her down, she was so far along, no control of her body, too much trouble with every breath, he had to do it immediately, we spent maybe 5 seconds tops with her), she knew exactly how we felt about her and how much she meant.
     As these couple of days have gone by, the pain is still there, but the crying isn't as much, maybe once or twice a day now, after all, your body won't let you cry all day, every day. 
     To all of you who have lost a loved one, (because I don't think they are simply pets), sorry for your loss, concentrate on all the positive memories and remember, they'll always be in your heart and you'll always be in theirs.


polkadots

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Posts: 117
 #2 
I am so sorry to hear about Princess, Karla.
So sorry.
I can tell how much she meant to you and how much love you shared.
you are right in remembering our babies. I am hoping somehow if I remember and think about them enough, that hill between us and rainbow bridge gets just a little smaller.
I wish all of you much support and compassion tonight-
in hopes that somehow tomorrow is a little easier.

Pat (Daisy's forever daddy)
Nancee

Registered:
Posts: 1,328
 #3 
Sorry for your loss of Princess. My cat, Puffy, was called that by my husband (as a nickname)when she was alive.
Well, it does seem suspicious about the shots. I agree with you, but how would you know this would be the outcome? Don't blame yourself for something you had no control over.
I had a poodle who had a flea medicine put on her neck (this was years ago and she was 15 1/2 I think). She had seizures right away and went into liver failure and passed away weeks after.
I don't like vaccines myself, but some of my pets have had them (to be boarded) and they've done fine.
Again, sorry about your little Princess.
mollyboltsmom

Registered:
Posts: 991
 #4 
Karla,
I am so sorry for your loss of Princess. She sounds like she was a princess in every sense of the word.
Losing a beloved furbaby unexpectedly is always hard. Heck, losing a furbaby at all is hard.
I agree with you. We must keep the good memories in front of us to help us bear up under the sadness of loss.
When you can, share more of Princess' story and a picture or two.
You are in my prayers today.
Molly's Mom
MadduxsMommy

Registered:
Posts: 65
 #5 
I also lost my Maddux very suddenly. He was having difficulty breathing, too. Maddux was by my side all day while at home. I haven't been back there yet. I am staying with my parents, where Maddux grew up and had his own bedroom. But the house we lived in has his food bowls, doggie bed, and also another bedroom for him where my computer is. That is going to be tough. I know so very well how you feel right now. It is good to know that my crying will slowly decrease. Be grateful that you were able to say those things and say goodbye. Although I was with Maddy when he passed, I was hysterical and calling him name, hoping to see him lift his head from the back seat.
Things will get better for all of us. We just have to continue to think about the good times.
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