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monika

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Posts: 1
 #1 
This is my first post here. I don't even know where to begin. My sweet bunny Valentine passed away  at 11:45pm last night. He lived with his adopted brother Houdini. umm I guess I should start at the beginning. Last year I lived with my parents and our four indoor cats. When we moved to the house my parents currently live in, we also adopted an outside cat named baby. Well Baby girl brought us a surprise on Dec 16th 2006. It was Houdini a white rabbit with blue eyes, my first look at him I thought he was dead, as he was hanging from baby's mouth. I decided I was not going to watch this massacre and went back inside the house. My mom went to get baby's snack. Well she took off with Houdini, about 15 min later she came back and loo and behold Houdini was still alive and had managed to escape. We caught him. He was so tiny, I took him to the pet store, I had never had a rabbit before and had no idea on Houdini's age or what to feed him. Thankfully I met some great people at the store and they told me what to feed him and they put me in contact with a man who rescued bunnies.
And then came Valentine,  as you might have guessed baby girl had another snack planned for Valentine's day 2007. I came home that day to find a tiny fur ball in the cage with Houdini. I separated them and put him in a shoe box so that i could watch and care for him better. I took pictures (which are now gone), of Valentine next to a balled up sock. he was the tiniest rabbit I had ever seen.
Over the next year I had both boys neutered as they kept fighting with each other, but they still didn't want anything to do with each other. They also had tear duct blockage. So they were in and out of the vets office often. Last year in October Vali's mouth was bleeding and I rushed him to the vet and he had to have all of his front teeth removed, because they were so messed up. He got better and slowly Houdini and Vali became friends through the bars of their cages. Earlier this year a miracle happened when both rabbits decided they wanted to be friends. We didn't push them and soon they were even sharing one cage as Houdini invited Vali to live with him. They hopped into the cage together and all hell didn't break loose. Soon they were grooming each other and giving each other nose kisses. Last month in April I woke up one morning to find Vali's one cheek so puffy , that he  looked like a chipmunk. I rushed him to my vet and they scheduled a surgery the following Monday, I brought him in on a Saturday. He had an abscess and a bad one at that. His recovery was hell, his temp was very high and he had to be at the vets all day for about a week, for care. He was so miserable. My fiance and I  has to go out of town  and the vet boarded Houdini and Vali. Having houdini at the vet with Vali made Vali's recovery much faster. Houdini would stand guard in front of Vali and had to inspect everything that went in their cage at the vets. Finally Vali got better, and we took him home. He looked so happy to be home again. He was eating and drinking water, and being his happy old self. This past Saturday evening, he was making growling noises, like he did when he was younger. I decided I was going to take him to the vet on Tuesday, just to check it out. Vali's breathing became so labored on Tuesday that we just took him there and called while we were on our way. He was turning blue. They gave him oxygen right away, but he hated the mask. Our Vet felt around his throat area and found a large mass there, possibly an abscess again. She tried draining it and it was bloody and not normal looking, so possibly cancer? She gave fluids, antibiotics shots. oh and got his temp down, it was 107.7 when we came in. She tried telling us that there was not a lot we could do. but he was fighting there on the table to get that dammed mask off his face. We couldn't bear to put him to sleep, if he was still fighting. our vet stayed with us, an hour passed her normal hours, and sent us to a VCA hospital where he could get more oxygen treatment. We got there in ten minutes. His breathing was so labored, I could barely stand it. they put him in a oxygen holding cage, and he calmed down a lot. they said there was not much that they could do, except wait till the morning to get him to a bunny specialist that has an office upstairs. so we left him there. About 11:30pm we got a call from the vet at the hospital saying that he wasn't going to last very long and that his lungs were full of fluid. I still couldn't bear to have him put to sleep without us being there to tell him what we were doing and that it was going to be for his good. We drove over there and as we walked into a room one of the tech said that he just passed a few mins ago. I feel so ashamed I wanted to be there and i feel like I prolonged his suffering for my own selfishness, because I wanted to be there. i know he's a peace now, but I miss him so much. He was so young and he just got a buddy in Houdini.We held him at the hospital and decided to bury him in a pet cemetery. We came home and Houdini just knew. He kept smelling us and looking for Vali. I don't know what to do or how to find comfort. all of these procedures and all that suffering and for what to die young about 16-17 months old. This inst fair. i gave Houdini the sweater I was wearing when I was holding Vali and he just laid down next to it. it breaks my heart. I love you my Valentine. I don't know if i did the right thing in trying to save him even thought my vet said there was not a lot that they could do. Should I just have ended his life there instead of making him suffer 4-5 more hours. I'm so heart broken over this.. please help
rupertsmum

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Posts: 820
 #2 
Sorryfor your loss.

One day 4 years ago I found a black and white bunny at a reserve. Obviously dumped.  I had never had a bunny and I love animals so I bought him home.  What a learning curve.  The kids loved him.  After a year we took her to the vet because a blowfly has blown her fur.  Her cage was cleaned constantly and moved every day.  At night she came inside.  He gave her antibiotics and she got better or so we thought.  Eight months later I got her out of the cage because she was not eating and noticed she was bleeding from the mouth.  The blow flies had done it again and the maggots had gone up under her fur.  I wrapped her up in a towel and went to get a cage and while doing that she had a fit and died in my arms.  We only had her for less than 2 years. 

I decided I would stick to cats, something I know more about.  Rabbits don't live very long apparently the vet told us.

After she died I felt so guilty, how could I not know she was sick like that.  She came inside every night and had a cage inside to sleep in because it was warmer.  She looked fine the day before.  Don't feel guilty, it was obviously her time to go.

Thoughts are with you  Ruperts Mum
mykittygirl

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Posts: 881
 #3 
Dear Monika,

Please don't feel any guilt. Valentine was so happy for the home and love you gave him and that's all he knows. You did your best for him.

We all question whether we could have done something differently but I know that there isn't a one of us that has done anything knowing our precious angels would suffer because of our actions.

Losing your Valentine will be very painful and don't be afraid to cry. Houdini will be missing him as well so pay lots of attention. What a cool story how they learned to love each other.

It might help to write a letter to Valentine telling him how you feel...what he meant to you...and what you remember about him.

I will tell my Cicio to watch out for him at the Bridge. Although she's a kitty she had the most amazing rabbit fur. I always called her my little bunny.

Sending you lots of hugs..

Donna
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