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wildsage

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Posts: 3
 #1 
On Wednesday I lost my German Shepherd suddenly to cancer. She was technically my parents' dog, but I had been living with them during grad school/while looking for a job so she was basically my dog, too. This is just five months after losing our male Lab to cancer, and not quite a year since my little Boston Terrier died of kidney failure. I feel like I just finally start to heal from one loss and I'm hit with another one.

It was especially upsetting because of how suddenly it happened. One week she was fine, and the next we found out that she had tumors and internal bleeding and so we had to make the decision to have her euthanized. My mom and I were both in the room with her. She always got nervous at the vet, and she was pacing and whining. I fed her cheese slices while we waited for the tranquilizer to kick in. She really fought it - I think she knew that once she laid down she wasn't going to get back up. She was only 10 - I know that's not super young for a Shepherd, but she was in such good health beforehand, and had the energy of a dog half her age.

A few weeks before this happened, I got a new job, so while all this was going on I was also having to pack and get ready to move to a new city. Now that I've moved in I feel like it's finally had time to sink in that she is gone, and just about all I've done all day is sit around and cry. I wish I didn't have to think about starting a brand new job and getting used to a new city while dealing with this sadness. I wish I could be home with my family grieving.
Always__there

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Posts: 123
 #2 
SAGE>   Saddened at Your loss 100% !!!. Know for certain, whether You are where you are at present OR at home grieving Your loss, YOUR FEELINGS TOWARD YOUR BELOVED WOULD BE THE SAME. Bottom line, Your animals KNEW that they were loved period ! They were aware that Your parent and Yourself were their protectors ! So feel good knowing that animals live in THE MOMENT and an animal knows. I never underestimate the intelligence of a pet. Trying to cope in my own way re my wee man/chihuahua/16y, and take it day-by-As I state, once an animal has touched Your SOUL--- FOREVER!! What DOES help is photos and candles and possibly a toy of theirs. As I type this note, I have his stuffed pig that he used to stare at every day when I was in the kitchen and just an hour ago I dressed the pig in one of his outfits and the pig is on the table beside me !!  IT IS COMFORTING TO ME !!! A grown woman I am and resorting to this tiny pig at my side. We all cope in different measures and You have to do what You feel is right for your person. Also, we must attempt to see the pet's life as a FULL MOVIE OF THEIR LIFE and NOT THE FINAL SNAPSHOT OF. These are just words to you but hold great meaning. Try a few of my Suggestions and see if you can get through the process day-by-day. MY sincere wishes go Your way.. SherryXXPerryXX
FFforLizandDash

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Posts: 6
 #3 
Hi Sage,

I’m so sorry about your beautiful dog, and that the past year has brought you so much loss. Even the new job and move are major stressors, especially since you are taken away from the comfort of being with your family..

I lost my sweetheart Tyler, a Scottie, from liver cancer about 10 years ago, and it was so much like your situation — he seemed fine on Thurs, then Fri he didn’t come to greet me at the door, and I rushed him to the vet, then Sat found out about the liver cancer, and by Mon he was really feeling dreadful, there was no need to think about what to do. Remember that dogs try not to show how bad they’re feeling. I’ll bet you saved her from some terrible pain by making the difficult choice you did, and that is all about love.

Actually, I had another situation very similar to yours too. My second Scottie Gracie had lymphoma that was controlled very well for a year, and I got a new job and had to move from San Francisco to the east coast toward the end of that year. She was doing well when I moved, then 2 or 3 weeks later became really sick, and had to be euthanized. Of course when I lost her, there was no other dog at home, as Tyler was gone, I had the new job, the new confusing city, and no friends or family where I’d moved. Luckily, my new boss loved animals and knew how hard it was to lose your family member, and was very serious, insistent, even, in telling me to take as much time as I needed. I hope that people at your new job reach out to you in a way that really helps.

Be gentle with yourself, because all of this must be so painful and exhausting. You and your Mom probably saved your girl from a lot of suffering, and she never doubted your love for a minute. For her, the worst part of all this would be the suffering you and your family are going through. She’d do anything to be able to protect you from that. And if you have anything of hers — a toy, or pillow, or blanket? I agree with Sherry, it helps to keep it close. I lost both of my young dogs in a freak accident a few weeks ago, but a big squeak toy they got for Christmas just showed up, and I’m sleeping with it — even though it croaks if I roll over on it. I know at least one of them would think that it’s pretty funny when that happens. 🙂

Best wishes, sweetie, and love to all of you beloved pets.
wildsage

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Posts: 3
 #4 
Thank you for your response, I really appreciate it. <3

I put her collar and a tuft of her fur in a memory box where I have little things from each of the dogs I've lost. I am sorry for your losses as well.

I called my mom tonight and talked to her awhile, which helped. My Lab is staying with my parents while I get settled, and I'm going home this weekend to pick her up, which I think will help too.
FFforLizandDash

Registered:
Posts: 6
 #5 
Thank you, too. My parents and sister live 500 miles away, and they have been really upset about my dogs and really comforting. On Thurs. I’m meeting them and the rest of my family for an annual vacation, thank goodness.

I’m really glad you were able to talk to your Mom, and it’s even better that you can go home this weekend. I’m so glad you’ll be with your Lab. Take care.

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