Registered: 1567106507 Posts: 2
2 days ago I put down my 13 year old cat Cole. He was the most amazing pet I have ever had. My connection with him was like no other. My best friend my son. I’ve had him since he was 3 months old. He has always done well with other animals other cats. I had just taken Cole to the vet for a check up since it’s been a while and the vet said he seemed in great health for his age and just do blood work if I wanted to to make sure he’s healthy on the inside. Well I ended up adopting a kitten shortly after that visit. And Cole seemed to be ok at first along with my other 2 cats but then Cole stopped eating stopped drinking hid behind the couch and under my bed. He became skin and bones what seemed to be overnight it happened so fast. I took him to an animal hospital and the vet did blood work and a X-ray and said he’s having liver problems when I told him I had brought a new kitten home he said that’s what’s causing him stress and why he’s not eating and told me to get rid of the kitten if I want Cole to get better. He said Cole just needs to eat again and will most likely recover. He prescribed this wet food that supposed to help with weight gain. I had to force feed Cole with a syringe multiple times daily. I got him a calming collar and vitamins tried to give him extra love. I tried to find a home for the kitten even though I was getting attached to him but no one could take him. I couldn’t just take him to the shelter and abandon him. But now I regret that decision. I just wanted to be able to save this kitten and get Cole better. But Cole would just throw up everything I gave him I couldn’t stand to see him in such bad shape anymore. So I decided to put him down. He cried the entire way to the vet. I held him and pet him until he took his last breath. I am devastated. The guilt is eating me alive. Waking up and him not laying next to me. 13 years of memories are playing over and over again in my head and I can’t stop crying. I feel I betrayed my best friend. Chose the kitten over him which I was not trying to do at all. I’m not ok this messed me up really bad I will never be the same. My heart is shattered.
Registered: 1564851236 Posts: 32
I am so sorry for the loss of lovely Cole. I really don’t think you have reason to feel as guilty as you do. I question the vets conclusion that the reason for Cole’s deterioration was your kitten’s arrival, why would a new arrival have this effect when he’s always been ok with other animals. Vets don’t always get it right, there are a lot of experiences on this forum that are testimant to that. It could very well be just be a coincidence that he became poorly after the kitty arrived. You certainly didn’t choose the kitten over Cole you tried to rehome the kitten and wanted them both to be ok. Everything you did was to make things better for Cole, please try to be kind to yourself as Cole would want you to be.
Registered: 1567205174 Posts: 4
I am feeling the same exact feeling as you. I sadly had to say goodbye to my beautiful boy Harry 2 days ago also. He was 13 also, 3 months off his 14th birthday. He had stopped eating and drinking and vomiting for 4 or so days before I had the courage to take him to the vet. They took bloods and he had an X-ray. They found he had a heart murmur and a distended abdomen. I took him home and waited for the the vet to call with the results. His bloods came back clear but they needed to find out why he had a build up of fluid.
So I took him back the next day. They did multiple ultrasounds and xrays. That next phone call was the worst in my life. They found multiple tumours in his heart, a mass in his abdomen which was covering his kidney and it appeared it was spreading rapidly to his other organs. The vet said the kindest thing would be to have him go to sleep before his organs shut down and be in horrible pain. We told my kids but they just couldn’t bare to come and say goodbye. My husband and I spent ages kissing and cuddling him before he went to slept. Even then he was purring, giving Us head butts and major snuggles. I thought to myself is he really ready to go? But I knew deep down he couldn’t suffer especially because he couldn’t eat and was vomiting a lot. We brought him home and buried him in his favourite spot in our garden. I feel numb , sick , sad , guilt and lonely. Every little thing reminds me of him so I know how you are feeling. I wonder how long this pain and horrible feelings will last because at the moment I can’t see any light at the end of this dark tunnel. You and your baby are in my thoughts.
Registered: 1567106507 Posts: 2
Awww I’m so sorry to hear about your baby. Thank you for sharing. It’s nice to know I’m not the only one feeling this way. No one in my life understands the bond I had with my cat. They think I’m being over dramatic but I see animals equal to people. My baby was my best friend and every time I was sad he would come cuddle with me and give me this look like he wanted me to feel better. Now as I’m non stop crying I’m just thinking I’d sure love cuddles from my baby and those big beautiful yellow eyes grinning at me. I guess we just have to take it one day at a time. My condolences to your baby it definitely sounds like you did the right thing as hard as it is to make that decision.
Registered: 1567205174 Posts: 4
You are definitely not being over dramatic. You have just lost your beautiful little best friend. I don’t care what anyone says, they are not just an animal, they are 100% family. I keep getting told time is the best healer so lets hope we feel better soon. Grief is such a natural process that everyone has to go through in their lives at some point . For me at the moment, I start to feel ok one minute, then it hits me hard the next and I can’t stop crying. Our precious babies will forever be in our hearts. It hurts like hell now but hopefully soon the tears will dry up, the guilt will fade and we can remember our darling boys with smiles and laughter . I’m sure you understand, everywhere you look there’s a memory of your boy. I still think Harry is going to walk in and curl up on my lap as he always did. I hope you’re broken heart will soon mend and mine too.