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DeeM

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Posts: 3
 #1 
14 years ago I found a few day old kitten on the road, couldn't leave him, picked him up and despite everybody telling me trying to save him was not going to work, tom was a fighter. I bottle fed him and brought him up like a child. He was the best pet I've ever had. Such a gentle big soul who sat waiting for me every morning and when I came home from work every night just to be cuddled.
As he was getting older and my daughter was looking a puppy I decided to get a small pup for her. Tom was amazing with it and within a couple of days was happy to sit add watch it play outside and sit beside it on our sofa.
But that's when I let poor Tom down. I was moving my car outside and Tom was obviously hiding under it from the pup. I reversed and felt my wheel hit something. I stopped to see tom scramble towards his house. Jumped out to get to him and could do nothing. He just looked up into my face as I cuddled him telling him I was sorry and he fell asleep in my arms.

I don't know what to say or do. I my big best friend for 14 years and within a week of getting a puppy I let him down and killed him. My wife wasn't too sure about the pup to start with and blames me for bringing it, my daughter is tarnished with him now and I really can't deal with training the poor thing and his energy at the minute.

I buried my buddy yesterday in a spot in the garden we used to go and chat to each other. I know he loved it there but he doesn't deserve to be there like this. The dog has been shipped out to my parents and to be honest I am in bits about it. Any sad times I've had before I went and chatted to Tom, he replied with this funny wee squeak he always did and pushed his head in against mine while I tickled his ears. I guess I'm just posting on here because I don't have him to chat to and I'm just so annoyed.

I guess everyone thinks their pet is unique but Tom was amazing. Being brought up from before his eyes were open by me means he thought he was human, better than any human because he just loved and never judged. I'll never forget him looking into my eyes as he passed away, that was the hardest thing I'll ever go through knowing I caused it.
Shelster

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Posts: 2
 #2 
I’m so sorry for your loss, having a family member lost in such a tragic way is so hard. Tom passed on in your arms, looking into your eyes. He was comforted, knowing how much he was loved.
I backed over my baby girl, Tazzy, last week in my driveway. I’m still in shock and disbelief. It will take some time to sort this out.
This sort of thing has happened to so many pet parents and its never easy. The grief is more complicated when we are responsible.
It was an accident, plain and simple.
Godspeed to you in your healing..the raw emotion will subside with time.
VBunny

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Posts: 13
 #3 
Hi I’m so sorry about your loss of your wonderful cat Tom. It sounds like his life was full of love and he knew how much he meant to you. What happened is so sad and cruel but it’s a tragic accident, you had no way of knowing so how could you have let him down. It’s sounds like Tom wouldn’t have survived when he was a kitten if it wasn’t for you saving him and I hope you can recognise in time how fortunate he was to have you as you were to have him. I’ve found the loss of my furry friend very hard and this forum has been a real comfort, I hope it can be to you too. I know there really are no words to help right now but I hope you can try to be kind to yourself as I’m sure Tom would want you to be.
SmileyMyLove

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Posts: 15
 #4 
It’s a tragic story. I can’t imagine how you feel. My mother ran over my 16 year old cat when I was in college. It was an accident. My parents didn’t tell me for three months—on group chat with a family friend. I was devastated. Take heart in knowing that Tom had a really long life. Even animals know accidents happen. My cat was too slow moving at 16 and that’s how my mom missed her. There’s another story on here of an old dog who drowned in the pool he always knew. You are in the early stages since you are going over the let down. I realize this process is really long and there will be many more days of sadness than anger or guilt. Be good to yourself and remember that if you were Tom, you might be realizing your mistake of getting under a started car. He doesn’t blame you. He loves you.
SmileyMyLove

Registered:
Posts: 15
 #5 
He sounds like a wonderful cat that will be strongly missed by everyone.
DeeM

Registered:
Posts: 3
 #6 
Thanks for your kind words everyone. It's really appreciated. Tom was extraordinary, I've had a few cats but never one as in tune as he was. Sometimes he was a bit of a nuisance when I was outside as I could never sit down for a rest that he didn't appear within seconds to get onto my knee. My daughter grew up with him and he let her do anything to him, carry him about with his legs dangling, dressing him in her teddys clothes or forcing him to endure another film with her on the sofa.

When everyone was in bed, tom and I sat and chatted or just sat together watching the world go by. I must say I'm just devastated, he looked to me for help and I just couldn't. Is it weird that I've lost loved ones before but never cried over the loss of a human like I have over Tom. I could go on for days about the things I miss, first thought right now is his cold nose kisses. Who says grown men don't cry
DeeM

Registered:
Posts: 3
 #7 
Thank you everyone. I really appreciate your replies. I've had a few cats and Tom really was unique, the most patient docile big man ever. I typed up a few stories about him just now and clicked the wrong button through misty eyes and lost the post. I will tell them again but can't face it just now. I am just devastated and miss my big friend more than anything. Thank you again. Who says grown men don't cry.
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