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broken_hearttx

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Posts: 4
 #1 
Hi,  I recently lost my chiweenie Chica.  She was so dear to me.  She was my companion and my life revolved around her.  I am a single mom of one and she is 16.  So Chica has been my baby since my daughter is living her own life as she should.  The loss is so great that sometimes I think I cant move.  The guilt and the anguish.  Why couldnt the vet tell me she might not make it?  Why did this happen?  She was fine one day and gone the next.  I have been researching and all the people who have lost a pet feel the same way.  I feel so guilty that she died alone.  Did she think I was abandoning her?  Did she think I was mad at her?  How do you get over the loss?  This is something I can eat, sleep or be happy.  This happened on Thursday.  i come home to silence.  i had to put her bowls away.  Please tell me what helps and what I can do? 
 
Thanks You
efox

Registered:
Posts: 45
 #2 

Oh dear i feel your pain; i just lost my Savanna,(cat) my constant companion for 15 years just last Wednesday; i dread going home because she was always there for me; you know whatever was going on in my life i always had her to come home to. i understand, i to live alone love all my animals but it seems like the ones closest to me i loose; i have outside cats but they are not Savanna. i will pray for you dear  Texas friend; we just try and make it day to day; i have not been able to pick up her bowls yet and i still keep her box by the backdoor (she loved boxes) that i recently brought home to her; i can't seem to move it not yet and maybe some would say i need to get rid of her smell because of my other cat, Bella, but  i know she feels the same way. we still want her scent, her presence, we want her back so bad; i miss her so much; you will be in my prayers; take care, Elaine

sukismum

Registered:
Posts: 82
 #3 
Dear broken hearttx, I am so sorry about your loss of your beloved Chica, losing your best friend is the hardest thing in the world, but you have made a really important step in coming here. There is nothing I can say or do to make you feel any better, grief comes in waves and stages and unfortunately we have to suffer each and every bit of it as it comes along. There is no quick and easy way through it, but you need to look after youself and take one day at a time. For me it has been 11 weeks today and though it has got easier for me some days are so bad that it could of been the day before that I lost Alfie.
There are no answers, you have to live with that, and you will feel guilt, but that will pass in time. You had your baby for such a long time, and I am sure she loved you very, very much, that you can never change or lose.
Most importantly, don't let anyone tell you that it is 'only a dog', afterall you wouldn't say something like that to someone who had lost a parent or a child, but you will find some people are really insensitive when it comes to things like this. You will grieve as long as you need to grieve, and you will miss her for eternity, but she is safe and well now, and she will always be in your heart so she will never leave you.
Take care of yourself.
Kath.
EmptyNow

Registered:
Posts: 199
 #4 
I'm so sorry for the loss of your Chica.  It is such a traumatic experience to have our angels with us one day and the next they are simply gone. 

We've all been through that phase of despair.  It feels like life isn't fair when our babies are taken from us. It will be hard to get over that pain - I'm not sure that we can get over it.  We will always have that love for our babies.  They are still with us in spirit.

We are here for you. 

God bless - I will pray for you and Chica.

Love,

Piggy's Mom

rupertsmum

Registered:
Posts: 820
 #5 
Dear Broken Hearts


We all feel guilt when our beloved pet dies and since being on this web site I have noticed we all feel that we could have done things differently.  It is all part of grieving and doubting ourselves if we did the right thing or not.  My Rupert was dying in front of me and I had to pts and I still can't talk about it without tears.  It has been 16 weeks and I miss him so much. 

Time helps a bit and be kind to yourself.  Try each day to do something nice for you or for someone else.  Chica knew you loved her and just because you weren't there when she died does not mean otherwise.  Animals are intuitive and they can know they are dying before we know it.

I lost 3 kg from not eating and I couldn't sleep or function and my kids who are young were worried about me so I had to buck up so to speak.  Let yourself grieve because that is the only way to move on.  One day you may want to give that love to another lucky pet.

Thinking of you
Ruperts Mum
choochoo

Registered:
Posts: 115
 #6 

i am so sorry you lost your beloved companion chica.It is the worse feeling in the world when we lose someone we love so much and who loves us back equally.I put my girl of 161/2 to sleep just 4 weeks ago and she had that same disease IMHA.It is a horrible disease and at an old age is very tough to beat.It was probably your girls time as it was my girls also.as with yours she was fine one day and then gone the next.I too felt lost without her and alone.as far as guilt i felt guilt of not seeing signs of her illness and then guilty i put her  to sleep but there will always be guilt and doubts.But we do the best we can because we love them.Chica didnt feel like you abandoned her she knows you love her ,animals sense when it is their time and do not fear death as we do.You will always have her spirit with you and your love for each other will never end.She is grateful for all the love and happiness you gave her.You will miss her always but one day you will able to think of her in all the happy times you shared.You will see her again one day on the other side.take care

WooWooWoo

Registered:
Posts: 5,100
 #7 
Dear Andi,

My heart was breaking for you as I read your post about losing your beloved little Chica.  There is nothing that can ever prepare us for the loss of such a devoted and faithful little companion who loves us so unconditionally, and, I am afraid, nothing that can make the grief any easier.  

I lost my beloved little 16 year old terrier, Betsy, four months ago and I still miss her every day.   I can only tell you what helped me initially, and what has helped me over time.   The day she passed I sent out a formal notice to all my friends and family to let them know.  I immediately received comforting emails, phone calls, cards and donations in her name to the local humane society.  This touched me and made me realize what an impact she had on others.  My husband and I had a little informal memorial service for her when we got her cremains.  I still light a little candle for her on her BridgeDay and say prayers for her.   I talk to her daily and kiss her photos.  All these things help tremendously.

Also, I come here to comfort others.  This has helped the most.  I feel like she is right beside me as I type.

I will be thinking of you and saying some prayers for you and your Chica.   I have also lit an internet candle for her on this grief board at AurichWolf's Light a Candle Here Thread.  It can be found under Chica's name and will burn for 48 hours.   May your heart be comforted by wonderful memories of your precious little girl.  Please come and share you stories of her when you feel up to it.   We will listen with our hearts.

Hugs,
Melissa
Betsy's forever mom


PennysDad

Registered:
Posts: 14
 #8 

I am also very sorry that you lost your Chica.  My dog also died almost two years ago (July 21, 2006) of Immune Mediated Hymolytic Anemia (IMHA) and she would have been seven in just two weeks.  She didn't quite reach her seventh birthday.  The disease is a terrible one and often before you see there's something wrong with your pet it's too late.  I still am grieving her death and still have not gotten another dog.  Again so sorry.

broken_hearttx

Registered:
Posts: 4
 #9 

Oh it was so great to read all these messages this morning.  The more I read about IMHA it makes me angry that there isnt more awareness or that vets just dont tell you nothing helps.  I have yet to read any story that the animal survived.  Even ones who went through all the transfusions and meds didnt last but maybe a month or so.  Yes and people have been looking at me funny because I am work and I have tears streaming down my face.  Its just a dog etc.  They are angels and your right they dont fear death.  I think she knew too and that I would have done something if I could have.  I just wish the vet would have told me to take her home and let her go with me.  But it may have been harder that way.  I rescued her when she was just 8 weeks old and living in horrible conditions.  I should have known she wasnt the best of health when I heard all her litter mates died.  However when I took her to the vet during healthy times it was never brought up or even mentioned.  Then I read where some suspect Frontline and Heartguard both of which she was taking maybe the cause.  Its strange that all of a sudden vacines for us and animals are becoming so dangerous.  I think they are either making them cheaper or getting them from China and its causing side effects.  Anyway now I am angry.  I was invited to the lake this weekend but everyone was taking their dogs and I just couldnt do it.  They think I am crazy.  I am so glad I found this forum.  Thank you for letting me speak and giving me a place to find some solace.  She was going to be 4 in June.  God Bless!

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