Registered: 1513493992 Posts: 4
Perhaps this will help me, writing a few thoughts to all you wonderful people. I am not new to losing a beloved pet, and have gone through the pain before. It is different this time. Likely because I was her dad, and she relied on me through life. Megan, my beautiful gentle cat was put to sleep Dec 14, after 19 blessed years. I found her as a kitten under a car in the dead of winter (Canada). She was with me through graduating, marrying, buying a house, having 2 kids and now, unfortunately, divorce. When not having the kids, I at least could look forward to seeing her standing by a window as I came home, happy to see me. Her love never failed me, nor mine for her. She struggled over the last year with kidney failure and pancreatitis. I did all I could...fluids, meds, numerous overnight vet visits. Her time came Thurs, and I knew it. Her meow was different, she would not eat, could not urinate, and yet, she purred when I sat with her and gently stroked her. I have enjoyed my extra burrowed time with her and was always aware of how lucky I was to be with her. I cried at the vets, and cuddled her, kissing her, thanking her. It bothers me that I can't recall if I was touching her when the vet administered the injection. I would thoroughly hate myself if I wasn't. I stayed after looking at her beauty, crying, holding her and feeling like a lost little boy. I try to stay busy, but can't stop thinking of her and feeling the immense loss. So, I am up at night again, wishing she were laying beside me. I miss my friend so. Thanks for reading.
Registered: 1394551257 Posts: 234
Ken, I think you put it perfectly. At times like these, we do indeed feel like little lost boys. Whom can we turn to? What do I do? Who will understand; who possible could? Your loss of Megan is a disruption in your life, and her absence in a sense is the end of an era, for she can never again stand at the window waiting for you to come home. It is horrible, and nothing I can say will change that. All I can do is offer you my virtual ear to listen to you; everyone else here I am sure would tell you the same thing. We have been there, some more recently than others perhaps but we have trod your path. Right now it is a terrible time, desperate and lonely, but it will at some point. maybe not tomorrow or even next week, begin to get a little better, slowly and probably not linearly but surely, and you will be able to think of Megan with a smile instead of constant tears. She was with you for 19 years and there will even come a time when you will laugh at something she did-she was gentle, as you say, but she is a cat, and at least for me it is impossible to conceive of any feline in two decades not doing something ridiculous and nonsensical. You have my deepest sympathies Ken on your loss and my wish for you for comfort and peace in the days ahead.
Registered: 1498611382 Posts: 580
I am so sorry you have to have this deep pain in your heart. I wish none of ever had to go through the pain and emptiness we feel when we let our babies go. I am crying thinking of the feelings you are going through because I am still there, hurting. You are an incredible dad to Megan and I am so glad you shared your life with her. Be strong and remember her and hold her tight in your heart. Love and doggie hugs Termy;s mom
Registered: 1485695648 Posts: 311
You saved your cat and you shared 19 years together...remember this...this is a wonderful gift.....I know this is an immense loss, but she is now at the safest place on Earth...in your heart...she will always be with you....our pets unfortunatelly don't live as long as we do, but they are the best gift that we can get in our short life...they are angels from heaven who give us the purest love...the most genuine feelings.......I am still sad too......my beloved Westie dog unexpectedly died in my arms on 1 January 2017...he was 12...it was his vet's negligence .....she gave him wrong antibiotics...he could have lived a few more years...his avoidable death eats me alive......the forthcoming first anniversary is so very sad...I still cry every single day....😢😭
Registered: 1513493992 Posts: 4
Thank you all. There is comfort in knowing others understand how we feel. There is a deep hole without seeing my sweet Megan here with me. Love and comfort to all.