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MountainBreeze

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Posts: 6
 #1 

Yesterday we put down Hoku, our 11.5 year-old male, shelter dog who had been with us for 11 years.  (I often wonder if we rescued him or if he was the one who rescued us.)

Today I got up knowing he was gone.  Yet, I quickly walked through the house, quietly peeking at all his favorite spots.

Perhaps this was out of habit as I did this whenever I awoke and he wasn't within sight.  Doing this hurt soooo much.  It's as if my brain and heart aren't in sync.

Has anyone else done this?



Bobo

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Posts: 116
 #2 

I whistle - hoping she will come. I call her to come to bed when I lay down for the night. I ask the air if she wants dinner, I loved her dance when it was time to eat. So yeah MountainBreeze, I do.............

LukesDad

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Posts: 564
 #3 
I talk to my Luke and Lil regularly, and when I come home, I look in their favorite places in the yard, hoping to see them there.  When walking my new pups, I look ahead, hoping to see them lead the pack...maybe they're just around the corner!  In the morning I pray that they are doing well at the Bridge, and at night I pray the same thing.  I also ask them to visit me if they are able.

I've seen enough signs from my pups to know they're still around....why wouldn't we talk to them and keep looking for them!  God Bless!  Rick
MountainBreeze

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Posts: 6
 #4 
Thank you, Bobo, for sharing.



MountainBreeze

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Posts: 6
 #5 
Thank you, too, Rick.  I'm so glad I found my way to this forum.

I'm beginning to think Hoku somehow brought me to this site...he was always the alpha, wanting/needing to be the leader of our pack...

Mare

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Posts: 11,059
 #6 
Oh yes!  We know our pets are at their new home, but surely they are still here??  We miss them so much and hope that their leaving us was only a dream.  I am sorry for the loss of your dear companion, Hoku.  I hope you will share a few stories of this wonderful pet and a picture or two. 

Mare
precious Christoph ~ 2 years now ~

mariamyt78

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Posts: 130
 #7 
I lost my miou almost two weeks ago and i caught myself sometimes calling her name... I speak to my other babies and two or three times i said also "miou"..? "where are you...?"... but... no answer.... I wish to see her in my dream but...
I am so sorry for your loss... RIP Hoku...
Maria..

sunshinegirl

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Posts: 356
 #8 
MountainBreeze, I am so sorry for your loss of Hoku. And I do the same thing. Seven months later ...

Roman

LoriDR

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Posts: 2,123
 #9 
MountainBreeze, I can't say it better than anyone else here. Yes, in the beginning our minds have difficulty adjusting to our new reality. It's tough, but it gets better eventually. My boy has been gone now for 17 months, and it happens rarely for me now. Except, just this morning I thought, "How nice it would be to still have you here getting up with me boy." Hang in there, and share more about your Hoku when you feel up to it.

Hugs of comfort,
Lori

cwigg99723

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Posts: 628
 #10 
Yes, I have looked for Bonnie in all her favorite places. 

It is amazing that now we have a new dog, EmmyLou, she has taken up some of Bonnie's favoirte places to rest and relax.

Clara
Murphy22

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Posts: 1,982
 #11 
Mountain Breeze,
They are the perpetual child at our side, from waking til sleep.  Of course we look for them, pray for signs they are still with us.  It's a very difficult adjustment and it takes much time for our hearts to accept what our minds know.  My little one has been gone 2 years now.  Seems like yesterday and it seems like an eternity.  I miss her sooo much!
Sandie




chellej

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Posts: 2
 #12 
Absolutely.  There are so many rituals that had become second nature that I catch myself all the time.
FriskiesDad

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Posts: 89
 #13 

I still do it too. There is a spot on the wall in our bedroom right where my Charlie slept every night. He always leaned against the wall as he slept there. The oils from his coat got deposited on the wall. I just can't bring myself to clean that part of the wall. 

MountainBreeze

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Posts: 6
 #14 
Thank you, everyone, for responding to my post.  Your kind words are very much appreciated.

FriskiesDad, Hoku also has several wall spots marking each favorite area.  It is especially in these places that I continue to search for him.

chellej, you are so correct about things being second nature.  It is because of a ritual that I find it difficult to walk out of the bathroom.  Whenever I went into the bathroom and closed the door, Hoku would wait in the entryway of the room across the hall, facing the bathroom door.  It is only after I opened the door and he saw me again that he would go about his activities.


lennysmom

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Posts: 308
 #15 
Oh yes i still look..hope to catch Len at the gate when i come home or on his favorite spot on the couch. I talk to him everyday, alot, and i think he hears me. Keep talking and searching you will get some sort of sign when you least expect it. And your so right this sight is a life saver.
Katie Lennys Mom
YorkieHeidi

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Posts: 1,541
 #16 

I llost my precious Yorkie, Heidi on 10/7/10.  She got sick suddenly.  Raced to the vet with my daughter-in-law giving her mouth to mouth to keep her alive - after vet examined her he said she was in "very grave condition" and he would know in 15 minutes if she would make it.  I, of course, was hysterical as she was my soul mate and I took her everywhere with me.  On the way home from the vet, holding my baby, I suffered a heart attack.  I was in the hospital for a couple of weeks and going home and knowing she was not there was so unbearable to think about.  I adored her, I miss her so much and cry every day.  Can someone help me?  YorkieHeidi

MountainBreeze

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Posts: 6
 #17 
Today I awoke and looked for Hoku in his usual morning bedside spot.  I imagined him lying there, head on his paws, waiting, and watching me with expectant eyes, as if saying: "So, what are we going to do on this wonderful new day?"  I was happy for this warm memory, then very, very sad.

We're all fortunate to have had wonderful pet companions and now that they've found their way to the Rainbow Bridge, we're once again fortunate to find companions in this forum.

Thank you everyone, for your posts to my message.  Your kind words and support are helping me through this difficult time.



MaddiesGirl

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Posts: 39
 #18 
I know how you feel, last weekend after I lost Madison I just keep looking in her favorite spots, in front of the TV, next to the couch, on the couch. I sit on the couch and just wait for her to come and snuggle under my arm like she always does but she isn't there...It really is heartbreaking I keep crying every time I see those places and she's not there.
I'm glad you can start remembering good things and I am so sorry for your loss.

Buffaronie

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Posts: 94
 #19 







Count me in on this one.  I have found myself sitting on the couch and my eyes are looking in all of Buffy's favorite places to be.  She has been gone only 6 weeks this Saturday.  But yes, I find myself looking for her...and concentrating on the carpet areas hoping the vacuum has missed a spot and I can still see a paw print...  I still have her nose prints on the windows...and I refuse to wash them off.  I just can't do it yet.  I pick up her collar and jingle her tags, hoping she will come running, but she's not.  Then I just cry.  Sometimes I wonder if I am my own worst enemy.  When does it get easier...that's a question nobody can answer.  Thank you for your post. 

Lois

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