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NancyMarie

Registered:
Posts: 1,170
 #641 
December 31, 2018

Dearest Brenda,

It's been so long since I've been on Petloss but I couldn't let the year finish without wishing all my friends here a very Happy, Healthy and Peaceful New Year.

I apologize for the anniversaries I've missed but know I always think of all my friends here and I will catch up on Harry's thread,  I've always loved reading your sweet letters to your beloved Harry.

It's been a bit of a hard year,  I lost my beloved Jadie in May but it gives me a bit of comfort knowing she is with my Smudgie. My parents who are both 93 had a tough year and I'm caregiver ( almost full time) to them and still trying to juggle work,  it's been trying but I'm getting through it.  In addition,  after Jadie passed I was so sad and a friend of mine asked me if I would help foster some kittens, a local rescue had 16 kittens that were only 4 weeks old and they needed volunteers. In honor of my Jadie and Smudgie I offered to help and I have to say they brought my smile back and I became a foster failure,  I welcomed Olive and Jasmine into my house.  I will post pictures of my Jadie and my two new additions later in the week but just wanted to say hi and wish you and yours a Happy New Year.

For now,  Happy New Year and may 2019 be a good year for all of us.

Warm Hugs,

Nancy,  Mom to Calie, Sparkie, Ollie, Jazzie and Angel Smudgie and Angel Jadie.

brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,731
 #642 
Nancy,

I am sorry for the loss of Jadie. But, I am glad you were able to welcome some new additions to your household. We also fostered some kittens. They were feral kittens, born of one of the kittens that was here last fall. Luckily we was able to catch both females we feed, and get them spayed, so no new kittens from them. We have also welcomed a new member to our household. Smokey, a little gray kitten. He had belonged to one of the neighbors, but they decided they didn't want him anymore, and started leaving him outside. We took him in, and he has brought with him the gift of laughter with his antics. I hope that your parents are doing well. And I bet that Smudgie and Jadie tell all the angels what a wonderful mom you are. Have a Happy New Year, Nancy. 

Brenda
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,731
 #643 
Hi Har Har,

Well, here we are, another Thursday. Had to get up early, because of doctor appointments, but those are done now. In a few more days, it will be 6 and a half years since I had to let you go. Seems we have been getting a lot of rain, and the yard is so saturated that I can't park in it. So when Laura has to be at work, we have to play change around. Its also a new year, full of new possibilities, and opportunities. I have set some goals for myself. The main things is to start buying a house, pay off all the doctor bills, and save money. I would love to retire some day, and it would be good to have money to fall back on when I need it. We are going to be letting Gabby travel to the Rainbow Bridge soon. We believe it is about time to let her go. For some reason, she has started to lay wherever she poops and pees at. That is not normal. I hope you will welcome her when she comes. It will probably be within the next couple of months. Perhaps you can show her all the beautiful sites there where you are. I love you, my sweet, handsome boy. always and forever. Until we meet again, here is some hugs, cuddles, and kisses sent to you on the wind.

Love Mommy 
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,731
 #644 
Hi Har Har,

How are you? Today I got home, and I saw what I thought was a feather, but, when I got out of the car, it was a leaf. I really was thrilled when I thought it was a feather, and you had sent me something. I would really love a sign from you, or a dream visit. I miss you so much still. You will always be my big boy. You would be 18 if you was still here. I know up there, you are healthy and young again, and I am sure you are running around like you did as a kitten. Probably chasing butterflies, and the leaves that blow in the breeze. And, you and Roy, and Cuddles, and Baby Kitty are probably enjoying time sitting by the river and watching it flow by. I imagine it is a beautiful place where you are and one day, I will join you there. I love you, my sweet, handsome boy, always and forever. Until we meet again, here is some hugs, cuddles, and kisses sent to you on the wind. Love, mommy
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,731
 #645 
Hi Har Har,

I remember that you were called so many different names. You would answer to them all though. To me, you was Harry and Har Har. Jean called you Pooky, and Roy and Laura always called you Big Boy. You were a big boy, at 18 pounds, but you wasn't fat. You was just a big cat. I remember how I would lay my head on you, and even if I felt sad, your purr would bring me peace. You were, and still are part of what brings the sun to my world. I still have some sun, but, it is dimmer now without my special boy in it. But, you know what, when I think of you, the sun brightens, for, though you are no longer with me on earth, you still live in my heart. I still sleep with your blanket, and when it is cold, I use it to cover up, and I feel that your love helps to keep me warm. I love you, my sweet, handsome boy, always and forever. I still miss you. Here is some hugs, kisses, and hugs sent to you on the wind. I can't wait for the day when I can give them to you in person. I know the day will come, and you will be there to greet me. Love Mommy
griefstricken

Registered:
Posts: 595
 #646 
Hello Brenrae
sorry I haven't been on in a while. I am sure I missed some things with Harry but I always think of you both and the rest of the friends I made on here. Wishing you peace, health and strength for this New Year. sending  Angel hugs to sweet Harry. Take care. Stay well.
Donna
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,731
 #647 
Hi Har Har,

Well, today is the day that Roy joined you in heaven. I am sure you welcomed him like you always did. I love you so much my sweet boy, and I miss you. You would of been 19 this year. Can you believe it has been almost 7 years since I had to let you go. I will always carry you in my heart, and there is no one that can replace you. You will always be my special boy. I had you from the time you was three months old, until you was 12. When I first got you, you fit in the palm of my hand. Such a fierce little boy you were. If you didn't want to do something, you let it be known. I remember how even though you was still sick, you knocked the dropper out of my hand as I tried to give you your medicine. You was so determined not to take the medicine. Then when you got better, you would jump on the wall. I wish that I never had to let you go, but I did. It was for your own good, but, it broke my heart in so many pieces. I love you, my sweet, handsome boy, always and forever. Until we meet again, here is some hugs, kisses and cuddles sent to you on the wind. Love, Mommy

brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,731
 #648 
Hi Har Har,

I found a little gray feather today. I like to think you placed it there for me to find. It was fluffy and soft, and about the same color as you. I remember how your fur seemed like it had layers of different colors. If you was brushed one way, it was a darker color. I also think often of your scent. It always reminded me of spring, when the earth was being reborn. The sweet scent of flowers getting ready to bloom, and buds popping out of the trees. I loved your scent so much, which is one reason that I loved to lay my head on you. That and the feeling of peace your purr always brought to me, even if my world was in turmoil. I like to think you made me a better person with your love. I miss you so much, but, you know that. It has been cold here, and I know the cold hurt your bones. I imagine it is warm where you are, or at least the way you like it. I miss walking around the yard with you. We always walked around the back yard on days that was nice, and you would watch the world go by. I remember you trying to get the squirrels that came in the yard, and there was a bird that would come, and I swear it was teasing you as it sat on the branch and cheeped. You would just sit and watch it, and I imagine you was thinking, I am going to get that bird someday. I love you my sweet,handsome boy. Until we meet again, here is some hugs, cuddles, and kisses sent to you on the wind. Love, mommy  
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,731
 #649 
Hi Har Har,

Laura started her radiation treatments this week, so we have had to get up early so that we can get there and still get to work on time. Please have Roy, and you keep watch over us during this time. I listened to some songs on youtube, one was A cat Lullaby. It made me think of you, and it brought tears to my eyes. The other is one that someone wrote, called My Old Cat, and again I cried. On both of them I could picture you in my mind. Do you know how hard it was for me to let you go? Do you know how much I missed you then, and I still miss you today. I have learned to be without you, but, it was so hard. There was so many times that I just wanted to go there with you, then I wouldn't be sad anymore, but then, other people would be sad, so I guess it was a bit selfish on my part. I still can't wait for the moment we will be together again, I know it will come eventually. It just seems like it is taking so long. But, when my time here is done, again we will walk in the grass, and enjoy the gentle breeze, and just enjoy being together. I love you so much, my sweet, handsome boy, always and forever. Until we meet again, here is some hugs, cuddles, and kisses sent to you on the wind. Love, Mommy 
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,731
 #650 
Hi Har Har,

Well, we are almost done with the second week of Laura's radiation treatment, so two more weeks to go. And, it seems there can be no more hem hawing around about moving. The landlord wants to start fixing the place up, so he needs us or our neighbors to move, and since we need a bigger place anyways, guess we will be moving. I am sure that with the help of you and your angel friends, we will find the place that is right for us. So, that is our plan for the year. We need to find a place by May, so, hopefully one of the brokers will call. Whoever calls first is who I will go with. There is a few places we are interested in, so hopefully they will be within our price range. I love you so much, my sweet boy, and not a day goes by that I don't miss you. I still wish you had gotten better, or never got sick, then I would of had more time with you. But, no matter what, no amount of time would of been enough. I love you, always and forever, my sweet boy. Until we meet again, here is some hugs, cuddles and kisses sent to you on the wind. Love Mommy
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,731
 #651 
Hi Har Har,

Today we applied for a loan to buy a house, so now waiting to see what we can afford. I wish you was moving with us, it will be strange going to a new place without you. This is the last place you was with me, and it also makes me sad, for the memories I had of you here, I will not be able to make new memories of you in the new place, so the memories I do have of you, I will have to take with me. No exploring of the new landscape with you, no checking the perimeter of the new place. But, I have to try and remember that no matter where I am at, your memory will always be with me. It is just that I wish I could make new memories with you. I love you so much, and I miss you. I know that I will see you again someday, but, it already seems like an eternity since I last saw you, and I last hugged you, and kissed your forehead. I love you, my sweet, handsome boy, always and forever. Until we meet again, here is some hugs, kisses and cuddles sent to you on the wind. I love you so much, love, Mommy
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,731
 #652 
Hi Har Har,

We got the loan, and we have an agent to help us find a house. There is one that I particularly like, and I believe you would of liked it also. It has a sunroom, with lots of windows, and I would of set up a bunch of cat condos for you, and little places that you could sit. You would of been able to be out there, even when it got dark, and watch the fireflies, and the bats, and all the night time animals that would come out. And during the day, you would of been able to watch the birds and the squirrels, and even chipmunks. I would make sure it was safe for you. I guess though, that you are able to do what you want now, walk around and check the perimeter. That is one thing I miss doing with you. We would just walk around in the back yard, and you would check the fence line for any interlopers. I will always remember the time you was at the patio door, and I heard this deep grunting noise. I couldn't imagine what it was, and then I discovered it was you. There was a cat sitting on the back step, and you did not like it. He was in your territory, how dare he be there. I always called it your cave cat grunt because of the sound. All these memories I have of you. They bring a smile to my face as I remember, but, there is also sadness with these memories because you are no longer with me to make more. I love you my sweet, handsome boy, always and forever. I am so blessed that I got to be your mommy. Until we meet again, here is some hugs, cuddles and kisses sent to you on the wind. Love Mommy
NancyMarie

Registered:
Posts: 1,170
 #653 
Hi Brenda,

Hopes this finds you well.  I haven't been on since the New Year and just saw your post from January,  thank you so much for your kind words.  Today is Smudgie's 5th anniversary at Rainbow Bridge, can't believe it's been 5 years since I've seen that sweet face.  I know I told you about losing Jadie last year,  well 3 weeks ago her sister Calie joined her and Smudgie,  my heart broke all over again.  Calie was my first kitty, she was funny and quirky and crazy and I loved her to pieces like I love all of them.  Sparkie is my last old girl and she so misses her sisters.  She gets along with the 2 kittens I've adopted,  but I know she misses her older sisters.

Congratulations on getting your loan for a new house,  that's so exciting,  I wish you well.  I know I always tell you this,  but whenever I did get on this site,  I love to read your sweet posts to Har Har.  I know you said you have mixed feelings about moving from the last place Harry lived,  but as you said you take the memories with you,   I too need to move and I also have mixed feelings,  but I have to do it,  I've put it off for too long.  Maybe you can bring a small plant or tree or even a rock from the property you currently live on,  something that might have meaning to Harry and bring it to your new home, just a thought.

Remember,  the love never ends,  we carry them in our hearts forever.

Hugs and lots luck in the search for your new home.

Nancy,  Mom to Sparkie, Ollie, Jazzie, Angel Smudgie, Angel Jadie and newly winged Angel Calie.......

brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,731
 #654 
Hi Har Har,

Well, we looked at a house today that we feel may be the one for us. It is more in our price range. I think you would of enjoyed it there. It has a good size fenced in yard, and you would have so much space to walk around. I still wish you could be here and be moving with me. Yes, I know that in spirit you will be, but I can imagine you exploring the new place and finding all the goodies that are there, The new smells, the new sights. And, you would probably be sitting under the bird houses they have along the fence line, just waiting for the birds. It would be such a joy to watch you discover your new place. But, I am sure you have done a lot of exploring where you are, and when I join you, you will have to show me all the places you love, and together we can discover new places. I love you so much, my sweet, handsome boy, always and forever. Until we meet again, here is some hugs, kisses, and cuddles, sent to you on the wind.

Love, mommy
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,731
 #655 
Hi Har Har,

We are getting closer to moving, just a few more steps in the purchasing step, then the house will be ours. I know you would of loved it. Probably not when the train goes by, because it is pretty loud when you are outside. But, the yard is nice and big, and, I believe you would of loved that aspect. So much to explore. The windows are low enough that you could have a small cat condo sit by the window, and enjoy the view. This week, I was looking at some of the pictures that Jean has of you on her facebook account. It made me so sad, for you are no longer with me. I felt the tears well up in my eyes, but, I held them back for I do not want people to see that I am sad. People sometimes do not understand the sadness one feels for a family member that they consider "just a cat". But, to me, you was more than "just a cat". You were always like a son to me. My friend, and my companion. You was with me when I had surgeries, and kept me company. You was with me when my daughter had her surgery and had to be in the hospital for several days. You helped to hold the loneliness at bay just by your quiet presence. I have so many mixed feelings about moving. I am excited, apprehensive, and sad all at the same time. Is that normal do you think? Maybe it would be different if you was here, I don't know. And, I also worry about the cats we feed outside. Will we be able to catch them when we move, or would we be better seeing about a feral cat rescue group getting them and taking them to live on a farm, where they would be taken care of. I would hate to leave them here, not knowing if someone else cares for them. I want to make sure they are safe also. What to do??? I love you my sweet, handsome boy, always and forever. Until we meet again, here is some hugs, cuddles, and kisses sent to you on the wind. Love, mommy 
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,731
 #656 
Hi Harry,

I am reading a book, and it has a quote that I wanted to share with you. The quote is, "When I measure my life in the cats I have loved, I count myself blessed indeed." and that is how I feel. I have loved several cats, but, some just touch your heart more than others. You, my boy, was one of them. Perhaps it is because of how I found you, so close to death, and so very small. I have never gotten over how someone could be so heartless as to let you suffer like that. I always feel that God led me to you. Perhaps He knew that we needed each other. I will always feel you were taken from me too soon. I was not ready to let you go, but, then again, I would never have been ready. I still miss laying my head on you as I fell asleep, and hearing your purr. It was my lullaby. And how you would always make sure that your paw was touching my hand as we slept. I was also thinking of the quote I just wrote, and how it could be true for all our fur babies. You know that I will always love you, for you are forever my boy, no matter how much time passes. I remember how when you first left, I would lay on the couch, watching tv, but not really watching, just staring into space. I remember how much that I wanted to be where you was, but, I knew it wasn't possible. I was so very depressed at the time, but, I still made myself do what needed to be done. I remember how I couldn't sleep at night, for every time I closed my eyes, I saw you. I would spend hours when I was alone just crying. Eventually it got easier, but the missing you never went away. I still miss you to this day. I love you, my sweet,handsome boy, always and forever. Until we meet again, here is some hugs, kisses and cuddles sent on the wind. Love, Mommy 
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,731
 #657 
Hi Har Har,

I have been thinking about you, and all the things you did. I know that one thing I miss is the time we spent together. I don't really spend a lot of time in the back yard, because that is one place we spent time together. I so often wish there was a way to go back, and have a different outcome. I still feel that it is unfair that I had to let you go. It was one of the hardest decisions that I have ever had to make. I know that you are now healthy and young again, but, still, I miss you. I have also been thinking about the song, "Seasons in the Sun". We had our season in the sun, but, then, it seemed that winter blew in, with all the coldness of the grief I felt for you. So many cloudy days, full of the darkness and the emptiness of having lost a special family member. I remember just seeing over and over again, your last moments, and you laying on the table. I could not get the image out of my mind, sleep was like a long gone friend, for the images of you came. Of you walking on the bed and staring at me like you always did, to you at the vet's office, all the memories of you crowded in, the good and the bad. Those were such terrible days for me, I missed my baby, and I wanted him back. But, I knew it could never be, and I had to live my life without you. I learned to smile and laugh again, and you sent me some fur babies to help me heal. Thank you, my sweet boy. I love you, my sweet, handsome boy, always and forever. Until we meet again, here is some hugs, cuddles, and kisses sent to you on the wind. Love, mommy  
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,731
 #658 
Hi Har Har,

We are still waiting to close on the house. I still wish you was going with us. I know you will be with us in spirit, but, I would so love to see your reaction to a new place, new things to explore, new smells, and new sounds. I take Sandy back to the vet today to have his eye looked at again. It isn't as bad as the last time, so hoping we have nipped it in the bud. Laura and Jean both have 2 of the cats out walking, I wish you would be here for that also. I don't really go in the back yard much, unless it is necessary, for that was our place. It was so relaxing just walking around it with you. Sometimes you would follow me, and sometimes I would follow you. A game of follow the leader, I guess. I miss you so much every day. You know that I will always love you, no matter how much time passes. This week, I have been thinking of the song, I will meet you when my chores are done, and how they are true for us. When my chores here are done, then I will meet you in our home up above, and I know you will be waiting, and be there to greet me as I step over the threshold of this world, and into the new world. I feel I need to take care of everyone, and make sure they are settled pretty good, and have nothing to worry about when my time comes. But, one day, I will be there, and you can show me all the wonders that there is to behold. I love you, my sweet,handsome boy, always and forever. Until we meet again, here is some hugs, cuddles, and kisses sent to you on the wind. Love, Mommy
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,731
 #659 
Hi Har Har,

How are you doing? I am doing all right, but still missing you. Next week we will be closing on the house, and I do so with some excitement, but sadness also. You will not be moving with me this time. Yes, I know you will be coming in spirit, but, not in body. I remember when we moved here from Ohio. You had to be in the small carrier, because the two smaller cats had to be in the big carrier. It was so small, that you didn't have enough room to turn around. You would meow so pitifully, even in your sleep. It made me sad, but, we had to have you in it, because the other two needed to be in the one you would normally be in. I also remember how you hated carriers so much, that you even growled at Cuddles's carrier, even when she wasn't in it. So many memories of you, I can now talk about them and not cry, but sometimes the tears still form. I love you my sweet, handsome boy always and forever. Until we meet again, here is some hugs, cuddles and kisses sent to you on wind.

Love, Mommy 
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,731
 #660 
Hi Har Har,

Well, we weren't able to close today on the house, so it looks like it may be another month before we do. You know that I still miss you, and it looks like I am going to have to get a new photo album for your pictures from me looking at them so much. Laura and Jean have 2 of the cats outside walking them in thew back yard, but they are on a harness and a leash. I just can't stay out there and walk like we did. I see you as you would inspect the perimeters and make sure all was right in your world. I imagine that you still do that where you are now. The one thing that I hate for people to say is that they are in a better place. That they are no longer in any pain. And yes, I know these things are true, but, you know what, it doesn't help when you are missing them so much. Perhaps it is what they feel they should say, because they don't really know what to say. It is true, even if it is a person, or a furbaby. Perhaps the best thing to say is that I am sorry for your loss and leave it at that. But, I know for me, it is hard to find the words to comfort a person that is grieving. I read a quote the other day, "It has been said that 'time heals all wounds'. I do not agree. The wound remains. In time, the mind, protecting its sanity, covers them with scar tissue and the pain lessens. But it is never gone. This was a quote by Rose Kennedy, and I feel it is true. Yes, the pain does lessen with time, but, like any wound, a scar is formed, and sometimes under the right circumstances, that scar can be reopened, and the pain can return. Not as strong as in the beginning, but still always there, always a part of you. But, we move forward with our lives, never forgetting our loved ones that have left us, but, remembering the love they gave us, and we pass that love on to others. It is the legacy they left behind, the legacy of love. So, my sweet boy, as long as I am a part of this world, I will honor you by loving those that need my love, and one day, I will see you again. I love you, my sweet, handsome boy, always and forever. Until we meet again, here is some hugs, kisses and cuddles sent to you on the wind. Love Mommy
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,731
 #661 
Hi Har Har,

How are you today? Because we were not able to have our Easter dinner on Easter, we are having it today. Not a big dinner, but, it will be nice, a dinner to share with the family. I was also thinking about how soon it will be Mother's Day, and it was soon after that that you got sick, and then had to stay at the vet's office in what seemed like forever, until I had to make the decision to let you go. It was not a decision that I wanted to make. May is going to be a hard month, I have already been having sad moments when I think about it. Each time we thought you would be better, you weren't, and we had to take you back. It broke my heart so many times. But, I think that I will try to remember the good times, and not think about the bad. There will still be those times when a wave a sadness will hit me. We are now waiting for the judge to read the will, and decide if we can sign for the closing. I have been wondering if we need to look elsewhere. But, we all really like this place. To us, it felt like home. I feel that eventually we will get it, but, we can't wait for too long, since our lease is already about up, though our landlord says we can stay through May. I am hoping they get it worked out before May is up.  I had to buy a new photo album for you because the one that has your pictures is falling apart. I guess because I look at it so often. I do not want to lose any of your pictures. They can never be replaced. I love you my sweet, handsome boy, always and forever. Until we meet again, here is some hugs, kisses and cuddles sent to you on the wind. Love, Mommy  
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,731
 #662 
Hi Har Har,

Here it is Thursday again. I still have Thursday's off, but, they can never be the same without you here. Thank you for being my boy for 12 years, though I will always want more time. I feel we were robbed of our time together, but, the main thing is the quality of the time we had, not the quantity. You have given me so many wonderful memories that I can share with others, and so much love during those years we had together. I actually had to put your pictures in 2 photo albums. I was thinking that I have all these photos of you, but they can never catch your spirit, your personality. But, I was also thinking about how much of a ham you were, always finding the right pose for a picture. But, you know what, I will always remember how big of a personality you had. I will also remember the love that shone in your eyes as you looked at each member of your family. You will always be my sweet and handsome boy. I love you always and forever. Until we meet again, here is some hugs, cuddles, and kisses sent to you on the wind. 
Love, Mommy
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,731
 #663 
Hi Har Har,

Well here it is Thursday again. On Tuesday it was a month before your bridge day, and I thought about that all day. Can you believe it has been almost 7 years? It has not been easy, especially those first months and years. It will never be the same for me again. I know that life holds many changes, and some are so much easier than others. Saying farewell to a much loved family member is one of the hardest a person has to face. I will always be grateful for all the years I had you by my side, and I will always feel blessed that you were a part of my life, and you still are. i still talk about you, and all the things about you that made you special. We went and looked at some other houses today, and I feel you would of loved the one we decided to try and get. It has a private deck, that we feel we can build in a bit more and turn it into a catio, and I am sure you would of loved spending your days out there. I know how much you always loved going outside, and it would be safe once it gets a bit more built in. I wish you would be doing the move with me. I know in spirit you will always be with me, but, I miss so much about you. I love you, my sweet, handsome boy, always and forever. Until we meet again, here is some hugs, cuddles, and kisses sent to you on the wind. Love mommy    
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,731
 #664 
Hi Har Har,

Today is the first day that we took you to the vet after you got sick. I remember how I felt that you would get better, and it seemed like you just kept getting worse until finally we had to say farewell to you, my sweet boy. It was one of the hardest things that I had to do, letting you go. God allowed me to find you and make you my boy, but for just a few years. I know for everything in life there is a reason, and I would never want to not have those years with you, but, there are times it hurts so bad as I remember. Yes, I put on my happy face when I remember with others, but still in my heart and soul, there is sadness. It seems that as you go through life, you lose family members, and you also gain family members. I read something this week, it says that one's farewell is another's reunion, talking about death of a family member, which is true. When a family member leaves this world for the next, they leave family members behind, that will grieve, but they are reunited with those that went before them. You reunited with Baby Kitty, and then Roy reunited with you and all that went before him. I am sure you are all up there just walking around, and enjoying the perfect weather, perhaps sitting by a creek and watching the water flow by. That is a scene I would love to see one day, and I know I will when my time comes to be reunited with all that went before me. I love you, my sweet, handsome boy, always and forever. Until we meet again, here is some hugs, cuddles, and kisses sent to you on the wind, love, mommy
 
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,731
 #665 
Hi Har Har,

It has been a busy day today with dental and doctor appointments, but now we are safe at home. We will be closing on Thursday for our new place, and I know that your spirit will follow me to this new place. It will never be the same for me without you here, and soon, your bridgeday will be here. I try not to think of these last weeks of yours, and just remember all the good times with you. That is the best thing to do, I think. Not dwell on the end, but remember all the times before. To me you will always be special, my little boy. I miss you so much. You will always live in my heart, no matter how long you are gone, you can never be replaced. I love you, my sweet, handsome boy, always and forever. Until we meet again, here is some hugs, cuddles, and kisses sent to you on the wind. Love, Mommy
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,731
 #666 
Hi Har Har,

Today we decided it would be a good day to go swimming, but the water was colder than expected, but still nice. I am also struggling with a decision to make. It is whether it would be better to let Gabby come to the bridge with you. It is not a decision to be made lightly. I know she is hurting, and also stumbles when she walks. I have also noticed she isn't jumping on the furniture to lay beside us like she used to. I am not sure what to do, for I don't want to do something that doesn't need to be done, but I also don't want her to be in constant pain. So, Harry, that is my dilemma. I am not as bonded with her as I was with you, perhaps because I got her too soon after your parting. The bond we share, you and me, will always be special, no matter how many years pass by, and no matter the number of cats I come into my life. I love you so much, and I always will. You are my sweet, handsome boy. I will love you, always and forever. Until we meet again, here is some hugs, cuddles and kisses sent to you on the wind. Love, mommy
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,731
 #667 
Hi Har Har,

Well, it is getting close to your day of going to the rainbow bridge. Tomorrow is the day. Tomorrow we also close your our new house, so there will be a mixture of joy and sadness tomorrow. Today is also a sad day for us. We have decided to let Gabby cross the bridge. It seems it is going to be a rough couple of days for us all. I still miss you so much my boy, and I wish you was going with me. This is the first move I have made without you, since I got you in 2000. You did 2 moves with me, along with Baby Kitty. I know you would love this new place, so much room, and you could just do your mad cat dash all around the house. I could just picture you there doing that. You would also love being outside there, for I plan to enclose the patio we have, and make it a catio. I love you so much, my sweet, handsome boy, always and forever. Until we meet again, here is some hugs, cuddles and kisses sent to you on the wind, love mommy
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,731
 #668 
Hi Har Har,

I know my letter is a few days late, and I am so sorry. We finally got moved, and I wasn't able to do anything on the computer right away, as we were still trying to get settled. I think you would of loved it here. There is so much room for you to do your wild cat run. We are still trying to get Goldie and Bandit, so they will be taken care of, and have an easier life. We hope to somehow get them where we can have them with the cats we have inside. For now, they will live on the part that was built on. Perhaps you can communicate with them, and tell them to go in the traps, so we can get them. I consider them a part of our family, and I don't want to leave them there. I miss you still, and I still think of you. I still wish you was here, but, wishing will not make it so. I will just continue living my life until the day we are together again. I love you, my sweet, handsome boy, always and forever. Until we meet again, here is some hugs, cuddles, and kisses sent to you on the wind. Love, mommy 
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,731
 #669 
Hi Har Har,

How are you doing? we are all right, but still trying to get settled in our new place. I wish you was here to see it, I know you would of loved it. There is so much more room than our old place. So many windows for you to look out of. We are still trying to get Goldie and Bandit, but have not seen them for several days. Unfortunately, I can only go after work, and I can't spend a lot of time there. We have other people watching for them though. I am sure they are all right, and I sometimes wonder if we are doing the best thing for them for wanting to bring them into our home. We have Tiger here, but, he is still hiding. But, I don't want to leave them to fend for themselves either, and I would worry about whether they are all right. Perhaps you and your angel friends can help convince them to go into the trap we set. I have been praying so hard for this to happen. But, it has also been pretty storm the last few mornings, and they tend to not come around when it is stormy, plus with all the noise where the landlord is fixing the old place up, it may have them scared. I miss them, Harry. I miss you too, and I will always wish you was here with me. I feel we were cheated for I felt that you should of lived longer. I love you so very much. You know that you will always be my special boy. I know that I have to accept what can not be changed, but it doesn't mean that I have to like it. I do not like living my life without you here, but I have accepted it, and I know that I will see you again someday. I love you, my sweet, handsome boy, always and forever. Until we meet again, here is some hugs, cuddles and kisses sent to you on the wind. love, Mommy  
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,731
 #670 
Hi Har Har,

How are you doing? We are all doing all right, and we like our new place. Don't like the thirty minute ride to work though. But, it is all right. It is beautiful here with all the trees. I have a cat that apparently likes walking on my car. I think it must be one of the neighbor cats. We are still trying to get Goldie and Bandit, but, we have not even seen them since the Thursday we moved here. I don't know if we are going at the wrong time, and I am also wondering if we are wasting our time in trying to get them. I just wanted to continue taking care of them, and make their life easier. Perhaps it is possible that there is someone that needs them there. But, I feel for Tiger, because he is by himself for the most part, but, he still doesn't want anything to do with us. I am not sure what to do. Perhaps you and your angel friends could help us to locate them, and bring them home with us. I have prayed and I have cried, and I don't know what else to do. It would be easier if they came when we called, but, being feral, they do not. I love you, my sweet, handsome boy, and I wish you could of moved here with us. I know you would of loved it so much. I love you, always and forever. Until we meet again, here is some hugs, cuddles, and kisses sent to you on the wind.

Love, mommy  
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,731
 #671 
Hi Har Har,

Today is the Fourth of July, so that means fireworks, and some people will be cooking out. I don't plan to cook out, but, I may go see some fireworks at the lake. I remember how they used to scare you because they was so loud, but, I am sure that where you are now, you can enjoy the beauty of them. We finally opened Gabby's urn, and Roy's urn. We wanted to make sure that everyone was here for it. The urn really fits her. There was also a poem with the urn: 

                                      Look not where I was
                                      For I am not there
                                      My spirit is free
                                      I am everywhere

                                     In the air that you breathe
                                     In the sounds that you hear
                                     Don't cry for me
                                     My spirit is free

                                     I'll watch for you
                                     From the other side
                                     I'll be the one running
                                     New friends by my side

                                     Smile at my memory
                                     Remember in your heart
                                     This isn't the end
                                     It's a brand new start

                                     author unknown

I read this poem aloud, and I started crying as I read it. I know that you welcomed Gabby into your circle, and are showing her all there is to do. I still miss you my boy, and I always will. For me, you was the hardest to let go. I think it is because we knew with Baby Kitty, and with Gabby, it was time. But, for you, it was a surprise, it was unexpected. I always expected you to get better, and you just kept getting worse. It broke my heart so much, because I wanted so much to bring you home, but, that was not meant to be. I cried every night, and I prayed every night, but, it seems that God wanted you to bless His home. I know you are having fun there, and I know you have so much to show me when I join you there. I will see all of our babies that have went ahead of me. I miss all of you. I miss you so much, my boy. You are never far from my mind, and you are always in my heart. This is a poem that I found that I thought was fitting also:

                                                      The sky that will quit from wide,
                                                      As a color game at the worlds tent,
                                                      Know that once everything ends in him,
                                                      What is getting away from this world.
                                                      He is the gate for eternity,
                                                      The Threshold of infinity;
                                                      My soul is floating to him,
                                                      Once, at the end of my time.
                                                      My time she had come,
                                                      I had to say goodbye
                                                      Of my dreams of my wishes
                                                      I had to go.
                                                      Keep me in your hearts
                                                      Death is just the bridge to eternity.

It is funny that I saw both these poems this week, when I was feeling so sad. It makes me sad that you are no longer by my side, and I would of really loved to have brought you to this place. I know that is spirit you are here, for I dreamed of you soon after we moved here, and you was crossing a chasm, and telling me that this is how you do it. Yes, I could understand you, and I know when I get to where you are, we will be able to talk and understand each other. I love you, my sweet, handsome boy, always and forever. Until we meet again, here is some hugs, cuddles, and kisses sent to you on the wind.
                                                                                                                          Love, mommy
       



kjgonz

Registered:
Posts: 601
 #672 
Harry, although I never had the pleasure of meeting you, I kind of feel like I know you since you crossed Rainbow Bridge shortly before my Rosie did. Your mommy keeps your sweet memory alive with so much love. What a precious sweet boy you are to live in her heart with so much love. Chin chucks to you sweet Harry. If possible, please give Rosie a loving head butt from me. Xoxoxo
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,731
 #673 
Hi Har Har,

You know that I still miss you, and I always will. We are still getting settled into our new place, and I still feel that you would of loved it here. There is so much room for you to do your mad dashes around the house. We bought Tiger a bed to put in his room with him, and are hoping he likes it. He still doesn't want us to pet him, but he lets us know when he feels it is food time. He also doesn't like thunderstorms and starts meowing, so I go out and talk to him for a few minutes. I hope it helps. I hope that one day he will realize we aren't too bad. I am so glad that I had you in my life, and I still wish you was still here. I am still trying to get Goldie and bandit, but now, we have to put the food we leave for them way in the back under the bushes, and if it rains, there is a good chance it will get wet. We have decided to try going door to door and see if anyone around there has seen them, and if they are willing to let us try trapping them in their yard. That seems to be our best option. Please help us in getting these little ones, I know that you can let them know we are good caretakers for them. I love you, my sweet, handsome boy, always and forever. Until we meet again, here is some hugs, cuddles, and kisses sent to you on the wind. love, mommy  


brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,731
 #674 
Hi Har Har,

Well, I got some things taken care of for here, and we got some curtains up on several windows. We were able to get Goldie this week, and now, we just have Bandit to get. Perhaps you and your angel friends could lead her into the trap. We don't want to leave her there alone without her mommy and her brother. I am also afraid we are running out of time, and he will be wanting to rent it out soon. I would like to get her before then, so we can care for her, and give her a home. Jean and I were talking about how God does things in His own time, and I know that is true, and there is always a reason. We may not always understand His reason, we just have to accept it. But, it is hard to accept when you have to say good bye to a family member. We are having Laura's birthday dinner tonight since I have to work on Saturday. I wish you was here to see this place, but, I am sure you can see us from above. It sounds like we are getting ready to have a storm, and I know that Bandit is afraid of storms, just like you was. I keep praying to get her, and I know that God can lead her to where we need her to be. I pray it is tonight. Do you know how much I miss you, my Har Har? I miss you so very much. I am going to have to let you go for now, in case we have to turn the computer off. I love you, my sweet, handsome boy, always and forever. Until we meet again, here is some hugs, cuddles, and kisses sent to you on the wind. Love, Mommy 
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,731
 #675 
Hi Har Har,

It has been pretty busy here with trying to catch the outside cats. So, now we have them all, and we can concentrate on getting things arranged here. I wish that you could be here also. I know you would of loved it here, with all the space for you to run. It is so much more comfortable here, since it is better insulated. Sometimes it is too cold here, but, we are trying to make sure those with longer hair don't get too hot. We can't wait to see how they will react to a big Christmas tree, since none have ever seen one. I wonder if they will climb it like you did when you was younger, or just lay under it like you did when you got older. The holidays are still so hard without you. I am so glad I got to have you in my life. We were talking about how we would like to save all the cats, and make a difference in their lives, but, we have made a difference in the lives of the ones we have had. You would of died, and not had a chance to enjoy life if I hadn't went down that day. I am so glad that I did, for you are so special. I do not understand how someone can take an animal into their home, and then be cruel to them. I feel that the person that had you was cruel in not even trying to get help for you. But, I also feel that I was led to you, and you were meant to be in my life. I love you. my sweet, handsome boy, always and forever. Until we meet again, here is some hugs, cuddles and kisses sent to you on the wind. Love, mommy
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,731
 #676 
Hi Har Har,

I have been trying to get a piece of the bush you always liked to lay under to grow roots so that I could plant it here, but, it seems that I have not had any luck. I always called it Harry's bush, because you would nap there on the days it was warm, and you was outside. I don't know if I can get another branch to try or not, for I feel it would be trespassing if I went there. But, I would really love to have one here. Perhaps I will try tomorrow to get a branch and see if I can get it to take root. I still miss you so much, my Har Har. That will never end. I still have those bad days, and I always will. I guess when you lose such an important part of your family, it stays with you. But, I was the one lucky enough to have you in my life. There is so many times that I wished that I had listened to my instincts. But, there is no going back and changing things now, we just have to keep going forward, living our lives, until the day comes when our paths will cross again. I know the day will come, for me it seems like forever, but, I am sure for you, it is just a few seconds. I love you, my sweet, handsome boy, always and forever. Until we meet again, here is some hugs, cuddles and kisses sent to you on the wind. Love, Mommy
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,731
 #677 
Hi Har Har,

Another week has gone by. I can't believe it has been so long without you. I didn't think I would make it through the first week, or month, or year, yet here I am, 7 years and 2 months. I still think of you, and I still tell everyone that you are my special boy. You always will be. I still wish you could be here still. It seems like we are always pretty busy with trying to get everything set up. It has been a slow process. But, it will be done. We were able to get Bandit to come in the main part of the house, but not far, and then she ran back out. I know you are watching us from above, but, I wish you would send me a dream visit. I did have a dream of you when we first moved here. You was crossing a chasm over some rocks, and you turned and told me, this is how you do it. It was as if you was showing me the way, but, I don't know where you was leading me. I would so love another visit from you, for I am always happy to see you. I love you, my sweet, handsome boy, always and forever. I always will. And I will always miss you. Until we meet again, here is some hugs, cuddles, and kisses sent to you on the wind. Love, Mommy
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,731
 #678 
Hi Har Har,

We got the part of the patio we want to build in and make into a catio. It is more roomy now. I think you would of enjoyed going out there, and you would be able to go out any time you wanted as long as we were here, and up. I was thinking how much you would of enjoyed this place. So much more room, and lots of closets for you to explore. But, since there are more coyotes here, I would not let you out until we have a place built in for you. We are getting things done, a little at a time. It seems we have been a bit lazy with getting it done, but, my main concern when we moved here was getting Goldie and Bandit. I felt that was top priority, so now that we have them all, I can concentrate more on this place, and getting things arranged. or at least in the right rooms. You would of enjoyed the boxes. Yes, we still have those, because we need to go through our things again, and we may be able to donate some of the items. A man from work, came and cleared out the sheds for us. He does flea markets, and we told him that if he saw something he wanted and it could be sold, to go ahead and take it. I think you would of liked him, but, you always liked everyone. You were, and are such a social cat. There is so much that I miss about you. I miss your meow, and your scent, and, I miss how you always would sleep with me. I also miss how when I would say your name, and you was looking out the patio door, you would look at me as if to say, "What do you want, can't you see I am busy?" . You are such a sweet boy. I miss how when I would ask you for a kiss, you would bow your head down so that I could kiss the top of your head. So many things to miss about you. The one thing that they say, that is true, is that you never get over losing a beloved family member, you just learn to live your life without them, but, keep them forever tucked in your heart, and that is where you will always be. I love you, my sweet, handsome boy, always and forever. Until we meet again, here is some hugs, cuddles, and kisses sent to you on the wind. Love, Mommy
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,731
 #679 
Hi Har Har,

How are things going? I bet it is so beautiful up there. I think that Heaven is what you want it to be, and that all those you have known through your life are with you, and that families intermingle, so that those you may not of known, but, they know someone you know are there also. I bet that you and Roy spend a lot of time by a beautiful lake, with him fishing, and you chasing the butterflies, along with Cuddles, Gabby, and Baby Kitty, and any others that may be with you. I miss you, and I still feel you would of loved it here. There is so much room for you to do all your wild runs. I remember how you would do that, just run around like crazy, especially after we cleaned. I guess you thought that if we was doing something that you needed to do something also. I have been seeing a lot of  butterflies, one was flying in front of the window this morning, and I wonder if you was visiting me. I miss your visits when I would sleep. I love you, my sweet, handsome boy, always and forever. Until we meet again, here is some hugs, cuddles, and kisses sent to you on the wind. Love, mommy
brenrae

Registered:
Posts: 4,731
 #680 
Hi Har Har,

We took Nico to the vet today because it seemed like she wasn't eating, but apparently she is eating more than we thought. We discovered that the vet we prefer is at a new place, still with the same company, but a different office. So we will be going to that office in the future. I still wish you was still here. You would be 19 now, if you was. I know you would of loved it here. So many windows for you to look out. And so much room for you to do your crazy running around that you always did. I imagine you and Roy are sitting by a river, or a lake, and Roy is fishing, as you lay there and enjoy the sunshine, and the slight, cool breeze.All you cats are probably playing together. You, and Baby Kitty, and Cuddles, and Gabby, and precious, and Duma, and Calico. Just enjoying the sun, and the breeze. I know it is beautiful there, and one day, I will be with you all. I love you, my sweet, handsome boy, always and forever. I miss you so much. I wish you was here for me to lay my head on, for I always loved doing that. this year we are going to put up a big tree, the first one I have put up since you left. I may buy new ornaments for it also, for I don't know if I can use the ones I used when you was here. I love you, and I miss you. I will talk to you again later. Here is some hugs, cuddles, and kisses sent to you on the wind. Love, Mommy
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