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Pet Loss Grief Support Message Board
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Posts: 34
First of all I want to say to all of you who have lost a pet, I'm so sorry for your loss.  The pain is awful so I know what many of you are speaking of.  It helps to talk with others that understand losing a pet is a real loss and a real grief.  Well meaning people who don't understand this, will say to you, "well just get another one."  They just don't understand the sadness and that you have to work through it, as you would any grief.  They don't understand there words are as insensitive as telling someone who has just lost a child, "just have another one."

Suddenly, we lost the last of our cat babies, Ernie, this past Sunday, June 1, 2008.  He had diabetes and he was being treated for that, but we found out that he also had heart problems that the vets had not caught and this is what took him Sunday.  We rushed him into emergency care, but they couldn't save him. A blood clot had loosened on his heart and traveled to his back leg which made both his back legs paralyzed immediately.  Ernie didn't know what was happening and we didn't because we weren't expecting this at all.
I was extremely angry at our regular vets at first and then angry with myself for not taking Ernie to another vet to have a second opinion because we felt something else was wrong.  But, we'd used them for 12 or so years, so I'd hoped they knew what they were doing.  I'd never had a cat with diabetes so I wasn't sure about the other symptoms not having something to do with that.  We kept asking them and they kept saying he was just adjusting to being a diabetic on insulin.  I've somewhat worked through that anger and have now arrived at just plain sad and broken hearted.

We've had cats for the last twenty something years.  Ernie was the last of our longtime companions.  He was 15 and he adopted us when a baby.  We've lost all of them over the last 4 years.  Annie was 21, Katie 20, Mac 16, and now Ernie 15.  All had at least a year long illnesses except for Mac, who we just found dead in my home office one morning (that was a shock as she'd not been outwardly sick at all).

I'm going to post a story that helped me a lot and I hope it will help others.  It has probably been posted on here before and maybe recently for all I know.  This is my first visit here. A friend sent us the audio of the story several years ago when we lost Katie, 20, to cancer.  I just remembered it the other day.  It's a beautifully written story and says a lot that I just couldn't articulate.
Ernie was a handsome fella, a tuxedo cat with a very balanced mustache and goatee. He was a good guy. I'll post his pic as soon as I know how the picture uploading works on here.
My heart goes out to all of you who have had a loss.

Posts: 1,569
Welcome and please stay with us. I know being new here myself after i had our dog Peaches sent on her journey two weeks ago last Tuesday that this site helped me deal with my loss. You are correct, only those of us who have lost a friend, companion and as I call them a soul mate do not really understand the bond we have with our special friends. Responding to those who are going through or about to go through what I did has helped me in my time of pain and heart ache. You will see; before the day is over just how many warm compassionate people there are here. Perfect strangers who during their time of sorrow will take the time to read your story and so many countless others and offer you a kind word, prayers and hugs. Annie, Katie, Mac and now Ernie are together at the bridge with their many new friends. God Bless you through this most difficult time. We all here share some part in your loss, you are not alone.----Jerry in Oklahoma.


Posts: 991
I am so sorry for your loss of Ernie. It really does hurt when we lose a precious furbaby. Share pictures and stories, grieve, rant. That's what helps us move off dead center. You know that we're all here because each of us lost someone to whom we had a special bond.
You are in my prayers.
Molly's Mom

Oh, I read your post about Roadcat. Loved it. It was uplifting. Thank you for sharing.

Posts: 1,205
Dear Jenny
I have put a small note after the story post, but after reading what you have written, just a few more words.  It is so hard to lose our last guy.  Whereas before when one has to leave, there is another to cuddle and love, and rub heads with, then suddenly there is no more.What do you do.  Do you start again collecting another circle of furry friends around you, or do you say, no more, I cannot go through that pain again.
I am so sorry.  Thinking of you at this sad time.  Much Love, Di xxx

Posts: 1,400
Dear Jenny:
I am so very sorry for the loss of your sweethearts, Annie, Katie, Mac and Ernie.  I can imagine the pain you are feeling.  I know you loved them very much. I know they are all together and happy.

Thank you for your kind words for my Meister.  It's very hard to stop the tears.  I loved him with all my heart.

Thank you again.
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