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Posts: 2
Hello everyone, I found this site after searching for some help to get past my grief. I am currently going through a divorce it will be final in September. When we were going through all the paperwork and lawyers and all that, I only asked for a very few things. I wanted the dogs (we have 2), my car and my personal belongings in that order. We have 2 dogs, Sophie who is 11 and Rex who is just a year and a half. I had to get out if the marriage as my ex was emotionally and mentally abusive. Last year on St Patrick’s Day he once again got mad at me and screamed for me to leave, so this time I did. He told me if I didn’t take the dogs with me he would take them to the pound. I called up the women’s shelter, told them I had 2 dogs and they told me to come and bring my fur babies. I had the oldest Sophie on a leash and had the pup (Rex) in my arms, I got halfway out the door and he snatched Rex right out of my arms and proceeded the shut the door . I freaked out, tried to stick my foot in the door so he couldn’t shut it, he finally pushed me out, closed the door with Rex and locked it. I called the police to which they said that because we were married it’s a civil thing and would have to be situated in court. So I obtained a lawyer and proceeded to fight for both dogs. Needless to say the judge awarded Sophie to me and Rex to him. My lawyer said that unless I could prove that he abused the dog that I most likely would not win Rex because Rex had been residing with him. I was like yea but that’s because he snatched Rex from me and wouldnt let me have him. 😢 - within a bit of time after that, we started talking again and he wanted me to come back. He would let me see Rex whenever I wanted and I was able to take him on weekends and a week at a time. However it finally became clear to him that I wasn’t going to go back to him so we are proceeding with the divorce. It’s been 3 weeks since he’s let me see him. For some reason he’s ignoring all my text messages and phone calls and I even sent him an email begging him to please don’t take Rex away from me. I’ve cried so many tears I miss him so much. Me and Rex became very attached to each other. I just don’t want Rex to think I’ve abondoned him or anything. What makes it so hard is that there is absolutely NOTHING I can do about it. I fought for this little guy, I fought hard for him and I lost and nothing else I can do. This kind of loss is huge because he is still alive, he is still on this earth and I can’t see him, or hold him or snuggle with him. I would always wake up in the morning to him snuggled into the crock of my arm sleeping soundly. He is a chihuahua/doxie mix and only weighs 7 lbs. How do I get past this? How do I move on knowing exactly where he is and not being able to have anything to do with him? My heart is so broken right now. What kind of person does this to another person? I just don’t get it. Sorry I made this so long, thank you in advance to anyone that reads this - 🙁😢

Posts: 34

I am so sorry that you are going through this.  Since you’ve already established that your ex is emotionally and mentally abusive, he’s obviously doing this to torment you.

If there is any way you can lead him to believe that you can reconcile (just long enough for you to get Rex and leave) maybe you can try that.

I don’t want to recommend anything illegal, but if you can get into his residence (since it was your residence too) when he’s not home, maybe you can take Rex and move away.

Possession is 90% of the law and since in most States a dog is considered “property”  (we all know they are so much more than that), if you have him the Law might be on your side.

Please consult a Lawyer to see if you can get him back legally.  BUT, sometimes you have to fight fire with fire.


Good luck and let us know how it goes. 


Posts: 2
Thank you for your response. We actually have a legal separation right now on file at the courthouse. The stipulation on the legal separation is that after 6 months either one of us can flip it to a divorce if we wanted to. So he told me recently since it was obvious our relationship wasn’t going to work (because I wouldn’t move back in with him) that when the 6 months is up in September he’s going to go to the courthouse and flip the legal seperation into a divorce. That means that everything that has already been settled in court in front of the judge will be what the final divorce decree will be. The judge ordered that Sophie resides with me and Rex resides with him. I still have a key to his house but he doesn’t know it. About 6 months or so ago he took me off the lease so if I entered the house without his permission it could be breaking and entering and if I took Rex or kept him it could be considered theft since the judge ordered he get Rex. I’m simply devestated. About a month ago he was saying how he might just give me Rex, that he had to think about it and all that and now he’s completely ignoring any and all requests for me to see him. I just pray that my little pup-pup is ok, I just don’t want him to think I’ve abandoned him or left him. People say that dogs don’t think that way and all that but it’s what I feel in my heart. I love that little guy like one of my children, he just took ahold of my heart almost instantly. We first got him to be my husbands dog because Sophie was mine, she has always been mine, I’ve had her longer than I’ve been married to him. Rex instantly became attached to me as I got up with him every 2 hours to take him potty and I cuddled with him at night and made him feel safe in a new home and new environment. He was 2 months old when we got him. It breaks my heart a thousand times over knowing he’s so close, yet so far away. 😢💔😢💔😢💔
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