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Pet Loss Grief Support Message Board
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Posts: 2
My beautiful cat Gladstone died yesterday and I can't stop crying. He was my best friend in the world and made me happy when I was sad. Now I feel devastated and I don't know how to go on without him.

Posts: 839
I am so sorry for your loss of Gladstone. This website is full of kind people who understand the depth of sorrow we feel when we lose a a treasured friend. I am so glad you found us and hope you will come back and tell us about Gladstone.

Posts: 2
I went back to work today and just got home. To not have him here to greet me is just so painful. I can't imagine ever not hurting.
Gladstone was a beautiful Golden Tipped British Shorthair. He was the softest most cuddly big boy with the biggest green eyes. Those eyes stared at me the whole time during his final vet appointment, and I just hope he understands why I had to let him go and doesn't hate me. I feel so guilty I can't bear it.

Posts: 55

I can totally understand the guilt thing--I think all of us who have had to make the decision to put our animals to sleep felt guilt.  The only thing I have to say is you saved your beloved cat from more pain and suffering.  I'm not sure what he had, but many conditions just get worse and they can end up suffering.  

The day we put Riley to sleep, I too felt though that my Riley probably had no idea what was going on.  He was greeting these people coming into our house, not knowing what we were going to do. I kept replaying that over and over and over in my head.  First off, I don't think our animals have the same level of awareness that we do and I know we think that they are thinking things that we might be thinking, but I'm fairly positive that they just don't have the same awareness.  That's what I keep thinking that helps me through anyway.

The other thing I equated it to that helped me, if you've ever had sedation, like for a colonoscopy, the same thing kind of happens.  I remember the doctor talking to me, then I was out.  I think that's what happens with them and I don't think they are scared of it or anything like that.  But believe me, my first thought was "I killed my dog."  Those thoughts do fade.  It all fades somewhat, or like people say, the grief softens and your rational mind starts to kick in and you realize that you had to do what you did to keep your beloved animal from suffering or being in pain.
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