Registered: 1513766073 Posts: 17
It is 7 months today since I had to make the worst decision of my life to let my precious baby go.
Molly was a black lab/collie cross and she lived to be almost 14.5 years old. The last few years were a struggle for her (arthritis) but with pain meds we managed to control her pain and she still managed to live quite a good active life. Molly was my shadow, she was always there by my side and we had such a wonderful life together. I am so proud of her - she was my everything and even 7 months on I still miss her so much and think about her all the time. It still just feels like yesterday. It all happened so quickly and her health deteriorated in a matter of days. I still find myself replaying those days over in my head and wondering if there was more that I could have done so save her. Did I make the right decision to let her go and will she ever forgive me for it. I loved her so much and the pain inside is still there except I dont cry all the time now. I still have days where I feel so low and want her back so much that I can cry for hours. Today is one of those days. I went for a walk earlier on our usual route but this time I was alone, I imagined Molly running along beside me and prayed for a sign to let me know that she was really with me - the sign didn't come. The pain is worth it for the 14.5 years of joy that she brought to me. If I could have her back I would do it all again without hesitation but I cant say the same for another dog. Molly, I pray that we will meet again. I love you so much and will never ever forget you. You were my precious baby and will always be in my heart. R.I.P little one. Love mummy xxxx
Registered: 1532312312 Posts: 52
I'm surprised no one responded to your letter. And I'm so sorry for your loss of Molly. She sounded like a beautiful loving dog. I too am suffering through the loss of my Baby Bunny. I know I'm gonna cry through writing this. I don't know how people here are functioning: getting out of the house and going to work. While my brother works, I have to stay and watch my mother with increasing dementia, while all of Baby Bunny's reminders are here and it's constant torture. Because of her natural instincts, she ran off into one of the many holes she dug under the house and passed. But now she rests here on the property and it bothers me. Just as she was able to roam free, I feel she should be able rest free. But, it still breaks my heart. But, please don't feel guilty. You need to fill that sorrow and emptiness by giving love and receiving love from another dog. My little sister passed last Friday and the thought to stop loving another one of nature's creatures is unbearable. I'm already searching for another little sister who I can spoil. Please do not feel guilty. I'm hurting, too. We all are. But, you need to heal. And I'm sure if you just considered getting another one, you'd have a small burst of happiness. Please write me anytime. Baby Bunny's Big Brother, Joe
Registered: 1498611382 Posts: 580
Dearest Molly's mom,
I am so glad you have reached a point where you can remember Molly and all the wonderful memories you made with her. I am at the same place in my loss as you, I still have the pain and sadness. I cry but not as much as I used to. We all second guess ourselves when we decide to let our babies go. We ask ourselves the what if, maybe I should have but we made the best decision for them at the time. I too would do it all over again because what I received from Termy (my heart dog) was special as yours with Molly. There's nothing for Molly to forgive, our babies don't hold any ill feelings toward us because they know the depth of our love for them. I let Termy go 10 months ago and I still think of him a lot through out the day and try to smile and remember the memories we made together for over 16 years. What a journey we had. I read a book about signs from our babies and it suggested we ask for specific signs, I asked Termy for feathers and so far this month I have found 7 in the most unexpected places. I thank him every time. When you walk the paths you shared with Molly, you are not alone. Her spirit is always with you, loving you and watching over you. The only thing that has changed is her physical form, but rest assured she never really left you. I too would take that journey again with Termy because the love and companionship we shared would always be worth it. Your Molly is waiting at the Bridge for you when the day comes for you to be reunited . Peace and comfort Love and doggie hugs Termy's mom
Registered: 1309098374 Posts: 629
Good Afternoon, Dearest Amanda,
Please accept my thoughts and prayers as you remember your beloved Molly these months after she made her journey home. I so understand (as i'm sure that many in this wonderful community would likewise) how after a period of time, one day can come along that can bring us back to that day where our beloveds make that journey Home, and the emotions of that day become fresh and new once again. It is so emotional a time; my heart is heavy for you. Dearest Amanda, if I may, like you, I have had those days over the past years since, like yourself, I had to make that painful decision to send my little buddy Van Gogh, a true gentleman of a Maine Coon Cat, on his journey after sharing the last eight years of his fifteen some years. While it has been seven years, I still think of him daily, and some days, I still tear up thinking of him, missing him, loving him. However, if I may, Dearest Amanda, what helps during those times are the memories that come with the tears. Then, those memories heal the tears, and soon, I find the tears replaced with smiles. It did take time for this healing process to manifest itself, but I promise you, gentle spirit, in time, the love, joy, and loyalty that your beloved Molly brought to you will be forever what is in your heart and soul. Dearest Amanda, if I may also offer to you one last thought. Please know that at this time, you and your Molly are but separated for what is a short time of the same journey that you are sharing together. I further promise you, Dear Amanda, that your Molly, as your read these words, is surrounded by the many beloveds that brought us in this community together, and is now forever strong, healthy, playing in the fields, and sharing with her friends the love sand memories of the beautiful soul who gave her fourteen years of love, joy, and companionship, knowing that one day in the future, you will have the joy of reuniting, continuing your journey together..... If I may, I further offer to you, dear Amanda my assurances that when the time is right, and if you continue to believe, your beloved Molly will let you know in her way that she is with you still. I say this to you for the reason that my little buddy offered me that same assurance. If and when you are so inclined, Dear Amanda, I ask you to look to my post "A sign from Van Gogh" in which I recounted his sign, as well as other members of this community sharing their similar experiences. My little buddy has like wise visited me in dreams over the years, and I can likewise assure you that your Molly will do the same. I promise you that...... Dear Amanda, my hopes and thoughts again for you today, for your loved ones, and of course, for your precious girl Molly...…….. All is well with love, john
Registered: 1531963706 Posts: 104
I am sorry for your loss. I think even though you did not get a sign from Molly, she was watching you happily during the walk. She loves you and knows you did everything for her. May you find peace. Paula- Raider’s mom
Registered: 1532623604 Posts: 4
You did more than enough. You kept her going as long as you could. She loved you and she knew that you loved her. She sounded like the kind of dog who just knew when you had a bad day and would always be there to make you feel better. She's waiting for you and is watching you. Give her time, I'm sure she'll come visit you in your dreams.
I lost my cat a couple days ago and I'm struggling with feeling like I did enough. Trust me when I say that you did. She's already forgiven you. She loves you so much.