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Em_ma

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Posts: 10
 #1 
Day 4
This morning my alarm went all off your tail should of been wagging because u know it’s time to get up, I had to come down on my own squidge, I miss letting you out to just stand there, I miss making you breakfast while I drink I my coffee then you would sit in you bed watching me get ready for work. Instead I sat alone looking for you were I know you would of been. I am at work now girl but cant stop thinking about you its driving me mad, I keep looking a pictures of you and a videos I have. The look in your eyes is beautiful baby girl mummy loves you so so much it just hurts to know you wont be waiting for me when I get home. You would think I wouldn’t miss you at work not like you are here any other time but I just cant get you out of my head today girl, mummy is not having a good day I have to stop my self from crying by looking at your pictures but am not sure of that is making it worse for me but i need to see you. I am really struggling today girl probably because I haven’t had my squidge fix this morning. Just got in from work girl and oscar was really happy to see me he even brought me a toy to play with, he seems to be in a better mood today don’t worry though he misses you so much. It hurt me too much again because you wasn’t here to great me I had to go up stairs to get your blanket and have a little cry, am only crying because I miss you so much girl you made mummy so happy and today is just another hard day with out u in it. Oscar is sitting in you spot on the bed I am glad hes come up to keep me company I would give anything for it to be you here with us tho.
Just been on the night time walk with oscar I hate doing the walk with out you as oscar walking around by him self you would of Chased me up the hill as I ran as fast as I can to see how quick you could get me, but me and oscar just walked up nice and slow thinking of you the whole time.
Am sat in on a Saturday night and you would be sat next to me with your head on my leg having a chill while oscar is sat on his chair. Today is not a good day girl mummy is missing you so much it hurts. As I go up to bed and say to you and oscar bed time let’s go bed then give you both a kiss good night. Night baby girl mummy loves you xx
grievingmom

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Posts: 639
 #2 
I think it is wonderful that you can put your experience into words. They say it helps.

Hope you are doing just a tiny bit better. 

Stephanie
Grieving Mom
Em_ma

Registered:
Posts: 10
 #3 
#grieving mum I feel am doing the same I write to her every day now it definitely helps me in the moment am doing it am not sure long term but for now i guess it's how I cope
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