Registered: 1161193973 Posts: 6
I lost my best friend Taz on Oct. 3rd. I am so lost without him, and just sick. I can't quit crying, and I can't stand to be in my house because everywhere I go he is here....but he is also very gone from here. The presence of his absence is overwhelming. My friends and family just don't understand. They think I should be over it by now...I wish I was. I feel so empty.
This is my buddy Taz with his favorite cuddle toy.
Registered: 1159226963 Posts: 333
What a beautiful, sweet baby. No wonder you miss him so. It's so hard to believe that they are gone and so painful. I don't think some friends realize or think - our pets are more moment by moment, day by day companions than even our spouses (if we have spouses!) I realize that I rub and scratch my animals heads more than I cuddle with my husband. He just wouldn't want to be touched all the time like that. Our pets are so easy to love. There are no complications or major issues. Forgiveness comes so quickly with our pets. Sometimes we have to grieve privately for there are many who don't understand how much it hurts. We do. And you will be able to help others who visit this board grieving for others. It will soothe your heart immensely.
Registered: 1157206612 Posts: 1,604
I'm so, so sorry that it was time for Taz's transition; although he's very happy now, you're left in pain & sorrow, I know. Those who tell you to "get over it" are clueless and insensitive; don't listen to them! Your bond with Taz is deep & personal, and his physical absence is extremely hard for you to come to grips with. Take all the time you need - and it takes a great deal of time. Cry all you need to - it helps to wash out the pain. But remember that the pain is only yours: Taz is gloriously alive, absolutely healthy, and blissfully happy! And you *will* be reunited when the time comes; just as he is part of your heart, so will he be part of your Eternity.
May Taz's Creator hold you gently in the hollow of His hands, comfort you, and lead your heart to peace.
Registered: Member deleted Posts: N/A
No, you shouldn't be 'over it by now'. There is no set time line for grieving. We need to walk through paths of sorrow, anger, guilt, confusion, aloneness, denial and a gamut of other feelings and emotions when we experience the death of a kindred spirit and soul mate. For some people this loss will create stess, for others it will cause crisis. This is very normal.
Your friend Taz just departed a couple of weeks ago. My goodness, your grief is still in the raw stage, that stage where it feels like salt poured on an open wound.
Repressed grief is self-destructive so please don't try to just 'get over it'. Ignore those who don't understand and stay with people like us here at Pet Loss who do understand.
Grief is a very private experience for each of us, but however we grieve, we need the support of those who have preceeded us in this walk and are at various different stages. Talk and tears are the main healing variables. God gives us tears to express our physical and emotional pain. Yes, a loss such as this even creates physical pain. And talking about it releases tension.
Your Taz is so handsome and he looks very contented. You can tell he received a great deal of love while here on earth. Taz was a constant in your life, and is now a loss. You had a bond of pure, unconditional love with him. Please remember that love is undying. Taz took this love to the next world with him and a day will come when we will all be reunited with our fur babies, and the hole in your heart my dear, will be filled once more.
Be gentle with yourself and give yourself time. It will get better. I had to have my Maggie Rose cat put to sleep last May. I still grieve her every day because my life has changed. I shed a few tears every day. But I am able to honor her now by thinking of sweet memories of her.
The day will come for you when memories of Taz will make you smile again, through your tears. These memories will bring you comfort. And you will know that his spirit is always with you.
Rhoda (Maggie Rose's Mommy)
Registered: 1161193973 Posts: 6
Thank you all so much for your support and kind words. It helps to know that there are people who understand how deep the loss of a pet can run. Every night I spend some alone time, and I end up crying because I miss him so. The pink puppy he's with in the picture is now my constant companion. It was his favorite snuggle toy, now it's mine.
I have a pawprint cremation pendant that I always wear, I never take it off. When I miss him, (which is all the time it seems) I touch the paw on my chain and tell him I love him.
I know someday there will be a time when things will be better, and I am holding out for that day. Until then, I guess I will be grieving the loss of my soul mate, my best friend, and my most loyal confidante.
I pray about it everyday, and I am praying for comfort for all of you who share this road with me.
Registered: 1159726414 Posts: 18
I am so sorry to read of your loss of your beautiful boy. Taz is a beautiful boy and he knows how much is mum loves him.
When i lost my precious little Sky I found this board and it has helped with my pain. Three years later I still turn to my friends at Petloss.To know that you have so many friends here who understand offers so much comfort.
My thoughts and prayers are with you.
I know Taz is playing with all his new found friends. he is watching over his mum.
Registered: 1161193973 Posts: 6
I hope there's peanut butter there!! He was a peanut butter hound, and would say, "I love my mamma" in his best Scooby-Doo imitation. It was hilarious, and I miss that so much. I miss him.
Registered: 1159971459 Posts: 347
I am so sorry for the loss of Taz. I know what you are going through. My dog, Tucker was my very best friend. I have family and friends, but he truly was and always will be my best friend. My dog would pat MY face when I was sad or crying. It is so devestating to be missing him and crying......then not have him to hold onto...not have him climb onto my lap and pat my face with his paw. He weighed 50 pounds and thought he was a lap dog. Yesterday I went out and bought myself a silver bracelet at the mall and had them engrave his name on it for me. Maybe you could do something like that for yourself. I like the idea of people asking me "what does your bracelet say"? Then I can tell them all about the best friend I ever had. I send you hugs and prayers of strength and peace. They are always and forever in our heart and soul...We WILL see them again.....Tuckers Mum
Registered: 1159227204 Posts: 227
So very sorry for your loss - Taz must have been something really special. It hurts so bad and I understand how painful it is. I still cry each day - not all day - but there are moments when I can't believe my beloved Snuggy is gone. I miss his smell, I miss him running to great me each day, I miss his tail rubbing up against my leg, I miss him following me around the house, and I miss taking care of him.
Remember the great times you had together and that you were a great Mom - he surely knows that. The unconditional love from a pet is pure and that love makes us better human beings. Inner peace to you.
"Snuggy" Aug 19, 1991 ---- Sep 22, 2006
Registered: 1159225229 Posts: 332
I am so sorry for your tragic loss. Taz is such a beautiful boy. He looks like he's a real snuggler, like he adored attention.
Having family and friends who don't understand your grief is a sad part of the reality we all live. Unfortunately, they don't seem to give the same worth to animals as they do to humans. Personally, I think that's very sad for them. For they will never experience the wonderful, beautiful, unconditional love that you, we, have with our fur babies. I have found that I have limited the people with whom I share my grief to the few who have a genuine understanding of what I am going through. If you don't, you may find that they will stand in the way of your healing process. It's their loss.
I lost Jetson, my soul-mate, to cancer in June, and even now, I still have days when it seems like all I can do is cry. I miss him soooo much it breaks my heart. But I know I must try hard to be strong and live as best I can, so one day I can be with him and never ever be separated from him again.
I love the things you have done, like the paws and the toy, to have Taz with you all the time; I think it's beautiful.
I hope you come here often and tell us all about that adorable pupper. We all love hearing about each others' babies.
Registered: 1161193973 Posts: 6
Thank you all again for your kind and encouraging words! It helps me so much to know that there are loving people who understand my pain and grief. I wish that none of us had a need for this board, but I am so grateful that it's here.
I watched the movie "Scooby Doo" with my daughter, and it made me cry. My son used to talk to Taz like Shaggy from the show, and Taz just went nuts! He would get all excited, and jump all over me and the furniture when my son talked to him like that. Boy I sure do miss him. Everyday it is hard to come home. I know he won't be at the door to greet me, yet my heart still hopes that somehow he may be there.
I lost my oldest brother last year, and my oldest foster daughter in August, and now Taz. A wonderful friend of mine has drawn a beautiful picture of a cross, with a memory ribbon around it that has their names on it. I am seriously thinking of getting it tattooed on my shoulder...I've never wanted a tattoo, but I am thinking about it. I will have to upload the picture so you can all see what it looks like.
I hope everyone here is finding peace and comfort, and I continue to pray for you all.