Registered: 1509383713 Posts: 6
We sent him to the angles last night. My heart is in so much pain- I miss him so much. My house is not the same without him, even though we have 2 other cats and a dog. They are all sad as well. I never thought this day would have come so soon. I think I hear him in the house and wait to see him walk down the stairs but I know he never will. I still have that image of him just laying on the table at the vet just ready to go. I feel like my heart will never heal. I wish remembering the good times with him didn’t break my heart so much. It’s so hard to think of the pain he was in, I wish he never had to experience any of it. Ugh my poor Wilson. I feel so lost and so sad ☹️☹️
Registered: 1509886573 Posts: 1
Hi Scrucciti24, I feel the same way. I lost my beautiful Oreo Oct 1 and it seems just like yesterday that I had to say goodbye. Is it possible that you share your story. How was Wilson like? How old? What was he having trouble with? Does it bring you peace when you know he's not suffering anymore? Was there anything else you feel you could have done? I ask myself these questions so I wanted to know if you feel the same way as in you could have saved him.
Registered: 1510971903 Posts: 2
I understand your grief. On Monday sweet little dachshund Bananas went to the rainbow bridge unexpectedly. For the first few days it will be a shock. I cried a lot! But each day gets just a little better. I was able to look at her pictures today which was a big step. I try to think of her having the best time in heaven and that she would never want me to be sad over her. When I start getting angry, I make myself thank God for having her in my life and it seems to help. It helps to talk about it and have friends that understand how deeply we love our dogs. Keep your head up!
Registered: 1509383713 Posts: 6
Hi Mhe1803, of course. I had Wilson when he was 8 weeks old. He was the third cat I adopted and then years later my fiancé and I adopted our dog Coco, who is now 2. He was such a spunky, outgoing and loving cat. He Had a very close bond with our dog coco as well as our two other cats. June of this year he had his routine check up and blood work. The vet called me to tell me that he had kidney disease. He was put on a prescription diet and seemed to be doing okay. In October, we noticed that he was drinking so much water and going to the bathroom a lot. So we took him to the vet, they did more blood work and told me that his kidneys were failing and he was in the final stages with his kidneys. The vet said that we can put him on IV fluids, which we did. The vet also wanted to do an X-ray and more intensive blood work. We honestly couldn’t afford to pay $500 plus dollars for this testing. I felt horrible but I knew no matter how much testing we did he wouldn’t have lived any longer(my vet said). So we decided to do the fluids and his special diet. He seemed to be doing better, was still drinking from everything but not as much. I was hopeful. He was on the fluids for about 20 days(he hated them), I then noticed that he was eating less and less. I gave him treats which he didn’t chew and he just swallowed(he had a large ulcer on his gums) Then yesterday morning, he was crying/meowing so loud and and he seemed just so sad and seemed to be done with being on earth. I took him to the vet, the vet told me he was extremely anemic and he had another ulcer on his tongue. The vet said these ulcers are very painful which is the reason he is not eating. I told her everything that had been going on in the past couple of days and she told me that it was time. I asked her, if this was her pet what would she do. She told me that he was in pain and she would put him down. I cried- I dreaded hearing that from my vet but I knew it was time. We went home to enjoy some hours together and I let him walk around outside. He wasn’t the Wilson I knew, he walked very slowly outside, didn’t try to chase after the birds that were in our yard, just walked very slow. I brought him in and loved him and enjoyed the hours I had left with him. Before my fiancé and I took him to the vet for the last time, I let him walk outside one last time. He walked into the bushes right in front of our house, collapsed and just cried. It was at that moment, I knew I was doing the right thing. Taking him to the vet was horrible, I still have that horrible image of him just lying on the table ready to pass. He didn’t move and he just looked at me with the saddest eyes. I held him until he took his last breath. Its been 24 hours since my poor Wilson passed. I don’t feel guilty, I couldn’t have done anything to have made him live longer. What hurts me the most is not seeing that amazing cat in my house anymore, his sisters are sad and I can tell they miss him and my fiancé is so upset. It’s horrible, but I knew if I had let him live another hour, another day I would have found him not alive in my house. And that is something I would have not been able to do. I wanted him to be surrounded by family and pass away in peace. I don’t know when I will get over this and stop crying, but I know at some point it will get easier. And it will get easier for you as well with your poor Oreo passing. Oh and my Wilson was only 6 1/2 😔
Registered: 1511019404 Posts: 4
I'm so sorry for your loss. At the same time, it's helpful to me to read because losing my cat was so similar. She had cancer, but it was a similar agony watching her change before my eyes. She LOVED food and used to drink water from my glass. She was playful and beautiful and loving. Like you, I keep replaying her last moments on that table, saying goodbye and walking away forever. I think it's probably unfair to allow that to be the most prominent memory of our beautiful pets. It doesn't matter how old they are (my girl was 12), they will always be our babies. I don't know when it will get easier. After two months I have days that are good, but frequently I just feel the loss. I have other cats, and I love them, but they can't take her place. Perhaps the best thing to do is focus on what a good life you had with Wilson and what he was like when he was happy. I've had many people tell me they stopped having pets because they couldn't take the heartbreak of losing them anymore. I don't think that's a good solution at all. Wilson was very special and unique, and was very lucky to have a good home. I hope you can take some comfort in knowing you're not alone in how you feel.
Registered: 1509383713 Posts: 6
Thank you so much for your kind words. They really do help. Im still so sad, even though I knew I did the right thing, I feel some guilt thinking that maybe there was more that I could have done. I miss him so much and one of my cats is taking it hard, they use to lay together in our guest bedroom on the bed. She doesn’t even go in there anymore, only to use the litter box. I can tell that she is sad ☹️
Registered: 1503009956 Posts: 158
So sorry to hear about his passing!
3 month after losing my baby boy to cancer, I still have a hard time focusing on the positive memories too. I agree with eeblake's reply, specially the one where he/she says: " I try to think of her having the best time in heaven and that she would never want me to be sad over her.". I hope you can find support to ease the pain and feel less guilt. You already struggling so much, blaming yourself certainly doesn't help. But trust me, I know it's easier to say then done. Blessings 🌺
Registered: 1511109885 Posts: 1
I understand how you feel.
I'm truly sorry for your loss xxx
Two weeks ago today I had to say goodbye to my gentle soul Linc💔he was 14& a half years old😢
I did everything I could possibly do to make him comfortable... but eventually the meds stopped helping and he was so tired it was heartbreaking.
Everyone keeps on saying it was a good age for a German Shepherd. .. that's not comforting in any way.
He will forever be my child... my protector.. my best friend.
I miss him soooooo much.
I feel soooooo guilty for the times I was impatient.
My heart is so sore.
It's hard to breath😢😢😢
It feels like a bad dream and I can't wake up!