Registered: 1581135812 Posts: 1
Guys all I have to say is im devastated,
I have three amazing dogs that I love dearly, my corgi had some puppies and I decided to keep one! He was so adorable it melted my heart! I let them into my back yard to use the restroom and they were playing! My fear was the puppy was going to fall into the pool but I didn’t want to be super paranoid all the time, I went inside for MAYBE 5 minutes to ask if my bf wanted me to get food, I went back out to check the dogs and I didn’t see the puppy, I immediately looked at the pool, it was night time, I saw him floating there with his face in the water, I jumped in! I was in my work uniform I didn’t even care! I grabbed him and was screaming my boyfriends name, we took him inside and tried so hard to give him CPR, but he was gone... I can’t stop blaming myself it kills me... I keep wondering if he suffered, I blame myself for being stupid and going inside, I wonder if I tried longer would I have gotten him back, it hurts my soul knowing If I just stayed out there he might still be with us today, seeing remis face (his mom) everyday just breaks me because I feel I took her child from her. I honestly can say I hate myself for this.. it’s been a week and I can’t get the image out of my head of him floating in the pool, it crushes me. He was just a baby.. he didn’t deserve to go that way. How do I get over this.. please help...
Registered: 1581030060 Posts: 12
I am dealing with a very recent loss myself, but of a different kind, so my advice might not be fitting for your situation, but I do want to say one very important thing: This was an accident. You cannot control everything every second. You sound like a loving, caring person, a great dog friend. Your dogs are lucky to have someone like you to be their companion! This was an accident, nothing more nothing less. Losing such a new baby is hard because you cannot mourn them like you can mourn an old friend, with photos and memories and journals. Have a celebration of his short but happy life. Play some music, light some candles. The best you can do right now is take care of yourself and your corgi. The guilt will lessen, as will the grief with time. We are here, together.