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Posts: 1
I am heartbroken.

Last Monday, 1 week today, I lost my cat, my little boy, Arlo. He was just over 1 years old. I lost him to what I think was a RTA. He was usually an indoor cat but at the weekend before last Monday we decided to let him out. He always wanted to be out and it was a race to who could get to the door the quickest. My other cat Alfie, goes out daily but he never ventures far, he likes to sit in the garden or on the shed roof. But after a discussion we decided to let Arlo out, hoping he would stay close to where Alfie would be.
On the Saturday he decided to be more adventurous and went over the fence in our back garden but after me calling him, he came back. (Not for a while though, I think he was been curious with it being the first time he was outside, in the jungle!)

On Sunday evening, I called him back in for his tea, but as I was letting our dog out into the garden, Arlo darted outside. And he climbed up onto the shed, it was pitch black outside and I kept calling him but he wouldn’t come back in, I was shaking the biscuits, wrattling the ham packet but wasn’t having any of it and then he jumped down off the fence. I stayed up til gone 11pm but he wouldn’t come in. So with me having to be up for work on the Monday morning, I left the back door propped open, with the security light on in the garden and his food bowl full, I went to bed. I thought he would be asleep in the kitchen the next morning when I got up, but he wasn’t. His food hadn’t been touched and that’s when part me knew something was wrong.

Before work, me and my boyfriend went searching but no luck. I didn’t really want to go to work knowing my boy had not returned home, but I also had this feeling that he was just being curious and that he would return home. I went off to work whilst my boyfriend carried on searching.

Then my worst nightmare begun.

My boyfriend came to my work and he didn’t say anything but I could tell by the way he was looking at me, that my Arlo had been found. He had died.
He found him on grass next to a road. I screamed inside! I couldn’t believe it!

And now I am heartbroken, I want to be with him. I want to know what happened. I feel so guilty! Guilty that I went to bed and didn’t search for him! I hate coming home. Everywhere I look at home, reminds me of him. I feel depressed and I feel like I’ve died with him. I’m struggling to eat, struggling to sleep. I just wish I stayed up and called for him! It breaks me to think he was on his own in his final moments when I should of been there, I was his protector and I feel like I failed him.

I think I just needed to let this out, if you read this, thank you for listening to me

Arlo’s mummy ❤️

Posts: 20
You can not blame yourself, some cats long to be outside. Very sad the way things turned out as he was such a young boy. 
Very sorry. 
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