Registered: 1572168187 Posts: 6
Tonight my beautiful boy Peeves died in my arms. He's been my best friend since I got him as a kitten 18 years ago. He's been sickly for quite some time, and got really bad about two weeks ago, to where I could tell it was time. No evidence of pain, but weak, wasting away from CRF, not wanting food anymore.
He's been so picky about routine that the vet clinic would upset him more, and with no pain I didn't think it would be a benefit to shorten the process and add stress. So I spent the whole two weeks sitting with him and telling him all the things about him that were amazing, and how much I love him and told stories of good times together. He was so tired. He didn't purr, or kiss me, or anything affectionate really, but he seemed to enjoy sitting close together on the couch. Honestly, it was nearly perfect, in terms of death. Still weird to sit on the good computer chair with nobody next to me, still so heartbreaking that he won't ask me to go for a midnight walk...but I guess even a near perfect death has downsides. I don't seem to be in control of my face--if someone gives me a compassionate look, or asks how I am, or if a random stray thought goes through my head I can feel my face instantly crumple into some grotesque leaking prune gremlin. So I guess I felt like I needed to write this to say that my boy was the best cat I ever met, and an inseparable best friend, and I truly do love him. It needs to be emphasized because I'm planning to get a kitten as soon as the shelter opens for the week, and it might otherwise seem like I didn't care. The new one won't be my Peeves, and can't possibly replace him, but it's already been too long without a purr in my life. And I kind of think...I mean yeah, there's a Peeves shaped hole in my heart. It connects to the outside...feels more like knocking down a wall to the outside of your house for remodeling, so if I add on a kitten -shaped room it can hold all the love and memories in the Peeves shaped room so they don't leak away. TLDR: Tell your boys and girls there's someone awesome coming to play at the bridge with them, and please don't think of me as an uncaring monster for getting another cat as soon as humanly possible.
Registered: 1503259123 Posts: 63
Hi Porcupette so sorry to hear of the loss of your beautiful Peeves. It is obvious that you loved him so very much and he was a constant source of love and companionship.
I lost my beautiful cat Ripley last week. He was 20 with CRF..skin and bones. I hate the unpredictable disease that took him from me. I find it so hard to get through each day without him. I have the prune gremlin face on a regular basis. Bless you for welcoming another soul into your heart. I cannot imagine living without a cat in my life. I am pretty sure Peeves would want you to be happy, and you are saving a life..you are awesome. You aren't replacing Peeves..but opening your heart to a new love..how brave. I am glad you had some time to say goodbye to him and share some beautiful memories. Good luck with your kit!
Registered: 1572168187 Posts: 6
It sounds like Ripley was a pretty amazing cat himself; I wish I'd had a chance to know him. Watching them waste away is the worst. Sitting all day in an empty house is also the worst...I expect Peeves to come around the corner at any given moment, even with a constant lack of my friend pushing against my brain at every waking moment. Thank for for your kind words, overwhelmed, and I hope you are finding the memories starting to add smiles to the tears. Prune goblins forever!