Registered: 1513880223 Posts: 1
I lost my 11 year old St Bernard yesterday. I adopted him from a shelter 10 years ago and he has been my constant companion. He was the most gentle spirit, beautiful to look at and a true gentle giant. He was goofy and funny and sweet and had a quiet confidence and grace that I've never experienced from any human. He loved everybody and everybody loved him.
He saved my life after I had a heart attack 18 months ago. I am single and he forced me to get better, to live, to take care of myself so that I could take care of him. My life has revolved around him for so long. I never made a decision without taking him into consideration. We were a package deal. Now that he is gone I don't know what to do. I feel like my heart has been crushed into a million pieces. I had to make the decision to put him to sleep because of debilitating arthritis. He was in pain that could no longer be managed and had serious mobility issues. I know I made the right decision, but I don't know if I waited too long, or put him down too early. I hope wherever he is he forgives me.
Registered: 1498611382 Posts: 580
Dear Teddy's mom,
Let me start with saying I know how you feel and I know your pain. I see that you were a bonded pair, you gave to him and he gave back. How lucky Teddy was to have found you. I know 10 years is such a short time to share your life journey but I can tell you had a grand journey together. I know doing the final act of love is one of the hardest things we have to do. I also have felt the doubts that you are feeling, was it to soon or was it to late. We will never know for sure. We just have to believe that our hearts told us it was time. I am still dealing with the guilt and the doubts about saying goodbye to Termy on Sept 18th. I wonder all the time if I should have tried something different, or maybe I should have waited, maybe he would have gotten better. In my head I know I did the right thing but my heart keeps screaming no it wasn't time. You needed more, wanted more to but I did the right thing. I am so glad he was there for you to keep you going. That's what is so wonderful about them. They are always there for you, no matter what. You took in to consideration of his quality of life and you knew it was fading. Keep strong and have faith that you did the right thing. You gave the biggest act of love, to let him go. Of course he forgives you, they never hold grudges and love us unconditionally. He'll wait for you and one day you will be together again, forever. Know that we all understand and have walked the path you are walking now. Love and doggie hugs Termy's mom