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Tanbrun1

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Posts: 1
 #1 
She was only 3 months old. A little sweet and playful golden doodle mix. My siblings were so excited to get a new pup and being the older brother I helped my parents make it happen for them.
This past weekend she was involved in a freak accident with another dog who was food aggressive. It seemed she suffered a head injury and we rushed her to the vet. She layed her head on my shoulder the whole way there... It was the longest night of my life. No sleep. Sick to my stomach trying to keep calm for my little brother and sister. The next morning we got a call. They couldn't stabilize her overnight and she started developing seizures and wouldn't respond to medication... We made the hardest decision of our lives that morning and went to say our goodbyes. As a 23 year old man I have never been so broken in my entire life. I couldn't keep it together sitting in that vets office. That poor sweet pup. She didn't know what happened or why it happened to her or why she may have been pain. And that's what breaks my heart. An innocent little being had to have her life shortened while a great, loving, and caring family is devastated by the loss. I feel like I let her down and I feel as if I let my family down too. I was supposed to be the responsible one. And I think it's all my fault even though no one could have saw it coming. I can't help but constantly think of "what-if" situations. How can I cope with this easier??
jrinphx

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Posts: 1,355
 #2 
I am so sorry for your loss of your little girl.  You ask how you can make this easier and I don't have an answer for that.  Grief is hard.  It can hit you when you least expect it.  I've lost many animal companions over the years and it always hurts.  Time does make it better but I can easily shed a few tears for an animal companion that has been gone for many years.  I believe the depth of your grief is also the depth of your love.  You loved her when she was here and your love continues.  

I started coming to this group over 13 years ago and it has helped me with all of the support here.

JoAnn - Jackie, Chan, Daphne, Scarlett, Noir, Stan and Thomas's mom and mom to many other Bridge babies.             
cosesmom

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Posts: 580
 #3 
I am so sorry for your loss. It's so heart breaking to lose a fur child but to lose one so tragically. I can see that she was truly loved and adored buy you and your family. It doesn't matter the age that they are when we lose them, it just rips your apart. I lost my heart dog almost nine months ago and I still grieve and cry for him. I've gotten better but I'll never be truly healed until I am reunited with him. He's waiting at the Bridge for me as well as your sweet little puppy will be waiting for you. Please don't blame yourself. You couldn't have seen this tragedy coming, so there wasn't anything you could have done to stop it. You loved her well and deeply and she knows that. She doesn't blame you, our fur kids never do. Grieve and cry as often as you feel the need but also try to remember that even though her life was short she did make lasting memories with you. One day you'll be able to smile when you think of her. She is safe and happy at the Bridge.
Love and doggie hugs
Termy's mom
doglife

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Posts: 69
 #4 
I don't know how this helps you, but I actually cried reading your post.  How terribly sad to lose a puppy.  The only thing that I can tell you , is what I keep trying to tell myself and it isn't always easy.  It WAS NOT YOUR FAULT!   Keep reminding yourself of that.  It was, like you said a horrible freak accident, and these things do happen.   You did not cause it to happen.  You tried your very best to save her.  What you went through is traumatic.  Give yourself and your family time to grieve and heal from this.  Cry and weep if you need to.  Let it out.  Talk about it to people who love animals like yourself and who are understanding and caring of your situation.   Puppies are like babies, and when they die in any circumstance it is devastating.  I am so terribly sorry that you and your family had to go through this loss.   I can only tell you that you can talk to us about it whenever you need to, we understand,  we feel your pain, and we love all animals, and it is utterly heart breaking when they leave us.   You and your family loved her.  Make a memorial of her with pictures and her toys and whatever you have and put it somewhere special so that she will always be remembered for how special she was.   She doesn't blame you either.  She only knew of your love and kindness.  

I wish there was some kind of magic wand that could wave away the pain of the loss of a beloved family member- pet.  But there isn't that I know of.  I keep on reliving the last day my 7 year old Jada was running around playing, and as soon as I start with the what if's , and the guilt for not knowing that day , that while she was playing that the very next  second of that day was going to be her last breath, a part of me dies every time I go there.  But like you, I think it is human nature for our brains to go there ,  even though we get nothing from it , and we cannot change anything by doing it.  Hopefully in time , we will come to realize that we have to learn to accept the things we cannot change , and only change the things that we can ourselves.  Sometimes the answer lies within us.  In time, we start to heal and we start to remember and cherish every memory, and the love lives on.  It never dies.  I hope you can find comfort and healing in time.  It's a process. 

Doggie hugs and kisses to you and your family 
Jada's mom 
Ghatten

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Posts: 1,821
 #5 
No words I can offer will help right now - only time can do that. But there is a family here that circles the globe who will listen and cry with you.

I wish I could recall where I saw it but I saw a tale or an article once about loosing a pet who is very young, basically it said that when it happens we were chosen especially for that pup or kitten (or other pet) - not to have them a long time, but to instill love in them and help prepare them for a special task that is their destiny in a next life. And when that task is done and they return to Rainbow Bridge, they will love not only the person for whom they had a special task - they will remember and love that 1st love who prepared them also.
Pawprince

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Posts: 92
 #6 
I too am very sorry for the loss of your pup. No, it doesn't seem fair - to your family or the pup - clearly she was loved, and yes way too young to die. So sorry this happened. Thinking of you and your family during this difficult time.
JohnFitzgerald

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Posts: 629
 #7 
Good Afternoon, Tanner, 

I am so very sorry to read about the passing of your precious girl. it is so very hard when
our beloveds pass on not only so young, but also so suddenly.....

Tanner, if I may, I ask for you today as you remember your beloved, to please know that in no way did you let your girl down. In fact, from your own words, while the time you shared here may have only been but a few months, it is but a few seconds in our existence, and but one part of the journey that you will share together. Clearly, that journey has been filled with much love and care. Also Tanner, if I may, please find comfort in knowing that your little girl is surrounded by many wonderful beloveds that we all remember, and that she is no doubt sharing with them her memories of those who love her, and will join her in the future.

Tanner, it is my wish for you today that you will find solace with your family, friends, and the members of this wonderful community.  More important, may you find comfort in knowing that your precious girl loves you, remembers you, and will forever be with you, in spirit now, united in the future.

All is well with love,
john
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