Registered: 1514530013 Posts: 7
I posted last week after I lost my boy Cooper. We all love our pets and think there special cause, they are. Cooper was a gentle, loving, funny boy and the best super snuggle Bassett hound boy. I just can not bring myself to put ANY of his things away. If you came to my home you would think he was still here. My. Husband pick up his food bowl the other day and I was hysterical. He put the bowl back on his mat. He told my to leave his things out if it was a comfort to me. He has been so supportive. He took this pretty hard as well. It's fair to say he is quite grief stricken himself. I just wonder if anyone has felt this way? I would almost guilty putting his stuff away. Pluss i just dont want to.Im not ready to let him go....
Registered: 1512692286 Posts: 67
I feel this way. Tomorrow will be a month since I made that last trip to the vet.
I still have the water bowl and her food bowl right where they belong. Her bed is up in the loft and I bring it down and put the same little red sleeping bag on it that she was wrapped in while at the vet. Kitty and I both curl up on her bed and watch TV together. I am cleaning out the car and the mat that was in the back in her area is going to go in the washer. I will vacuum out the car the best I can and put the fold down back part back up so I can use the backseat (it has been down for over eight years while my dog stayed in the back while we drove to our adventures). I am going to wash the inside of the car including the windows. There are some noseprints on the driver's side rear window that I will NEVER remove. I will drive with a pristinely cleaned car except for those nose prints. I will see them every time I get in the car. No, you are not nuts and neither am I. You are a kind loving person who lost someone very dear to you.
Registered: 1192815206 Posts: 1,191
Coops mom, you are definitely not nuts, and I don't blame you for feeling this way. I might be a bit extreme, but I will tell you that I didn't move any of my Blackie's things for several months after he passed away. I left his bed out and a bunch of his toys and other things, including his food bowls. I only put them away when I had to pack up and move out of the place we shared. It was difficult to pack those things away because it really meant he was gone. In fact, after I had cleaned out the place I was living in and all of my things had been moved to my new place, I spent some time in our old place going from room to room trying to savor one final memory of our life together in that place. It was definitely sad, and my eyes still fill with tears a bit when I remember our life together in the townhouse...
I ended up saving pretty much all of Blackie's things. I put most of them in a memory chest I created in honor of him. the memory chest sits at the foot of my bed. Every now and then I open it up and go through the things I kept, including a journal I created to save the memories I have of our life together. It's been over 9 years since Blackie passed away and I still miss him so much. I suspect I always will... - Kelly Angel Blackie's mom Angel Squeeker's mom
Registered: 1515010331 Posts: 7
I know how you feel. today is only day one and I can't move his kennel or toys. I moved the feeding bowls because it was always my son's job to feed him and I don't want to make this more difficult than it already is. we put down our leo today...and who knew one person could have so many tears. I miss him dearly and don't when I will be able to stop grieving. sending prayers your way.
Registered: 1507238806 Posts: 22
I totally understand. Kitty has been gone 3 months and I still have her meds on the counter. I just can't bring myself to throw them away. I had a meltdown thinking about her the other morning. Wondering what if I hadn't done this surgery for her tumor? Would she still be here? She was 16 why did I put her through that? I'm not sure I'll ever get over it. I do know there will NEVER be another cat so special.
Registered: 1514530013 Posts: 7
Thank you all so much for responding. Sending thoughts and prays to you all. Tonight has been a rough one so I came here to post cause it seems to help a little. I didn't realize that I had responses wait for me to read. I am so incredibly thankful to each of you.
Registered: 1326342541 Posts: 2,440
Coops Mom - I think for each person it is different. Over the years here I have "met" some people who found it easier to remove their babies things from sight immediately; and others who found it better to keep them around. There is no right or wrong. Whatever makes it a "bit" more bearable for you is what is best for you.
When I lost my Rascal so suddenly, I came back home with the laundry basket and blanket that I rushed her to the vet in. And I can tell you that for over a year that basket remained untouched. Thinking about it still brings tears. The day that I took the blanket out and washed it - over a year later, quite honestly I sobbed. To this day, I don't use that basket "for" anything but absolutely can't not have it here. Losing your Cooper is hard; it truly breaks the heart. When you are ready, if you are ready, you will reach a day that you make a different choice on your baby's things. But until/unless that day happens, know that there is not a wrong choice either way. Take care InMemoryOfRascal...and Rambo
Registered: 1516934633 Posts: 3
Sorry for your loss. My black lab Lexus just passed away 4 days ago. I still have her food bowl out and her coat she wore outside. I have a chocolate lab also..Both shed like crazy even in the winter and my house has dog hair everywhere but i can't bring myself to vacuum the hair up. It's like if I do I will forget about her but that's not true I just can't seem to doit yet. So no your not crazy for not wanting to put your baby's things away!
Registered: 1517499255 Posts: 60
My dog died on Monday. I washed and put away her dishes but am leaving out her bed and very grubby toys. Having them in their usual spot makes me feel a teeny bit better.
Registered: 1518486634 Posts: 7
I know exactly how you feel. I lost my golden a week ago, and I still can't bring myself to pack up her toys or get her dog food ready to donate to the shelter. Yesterday, I cut myself pretty badly and couldn't find any gauze to bandage it, but the thoughts of getting into the dog first aid kit and using HER gauze upset me so much that I ended up taping a part towel to my hand. So, if you are crazy for not wanting to put your baby's things away, than I am crazy, too. It is ok to not be ok for a while.
Registered: 1178588167 Posts: 1,355
I am so sorry for your loss. I've done a mix of things. When my heart dog Jackie died I could not stand to look at her bed and her food and water bowls. But her collar and leash still hang by the door, ready for our next walk. I could not throw out my cat Thomas's meds for months. We need to do whatever makes it easier to deal with the loss of our beloved ones. JoAnn - Jackie, Chan, Daphne, Scarlett, Noir, Stan, Thomas's mom and mom to many, many other Bridge babies.
Registered: 1498611382 Posts: 580
I too am not ready to pack things away. I guess if I do it'll seem Termy is really gone. I know he is gone but I want the memories to stay. His water bowl is still where it was as is his food bowl. The only thing I've moved was is crate to the basement. Every time I walk by it I caress the tapestry that covers it. I still haven't tossed the cheese in the fridge since September that he took his meds with. How insane is that? His harness and leash still hang in the same place it hung for over 16 years. I guess I just want the visuals that he was here all those years. I miss my old man so very much.
I hope all of us here can heal and hold our babies close in our hearts. Love and doggie hugs Termy's mom