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Posts: 540
To my precious little beagle girl Peanut, today marks the one year anniversary of your passing from my life and your journey to the Rainbow Bridge (although Tuesday really felt like the day as it was two days after Father's day last year).  365 days have gone by without you in my life, 8760 hours and countless minutes... but never once have you NOT been in my thoughts and in my heart.  Even thought you were an old girl and were having such trouble getting around and didn't even want to eat steak or chicken which you NEVER would have refused when you were feeling well, I knew you had to be uncomfortable, it was clear every time you tried to move, I still question taking you to the Vet that night and putting you to sleep. I keep thinking why didn't I just say No and bring you home with me that night to have at least one more day with you, to watch you closely and do it another day.  I logically know that you would not be here with us today one year later, there is no way you could have gone on another year, but even another few days would have been such a blessing.  I keep reliving that last day you had with us. A few hours before we left for the Vet Daddy and I blessed you with Holy water and did the sign of the cross on your sweet head and said a prayer over you and then right before we left for the Vet you hobbled over to where Jenna and Kaylee (6 months at the time) were laying on a blanket in our family room and you laid down right next to them. I have several pictures of you curled up next to them and in one you are head to head with Jenna. Daddy says that was you saying goodbye to them, that you knew it was time. Then in the car ride to the Vet's you sat in the backseat with me and I was holding you in my arms and you placed your head on my shoulder and we sat like that the entire ride.  Then we had you in the Vet's office curled up in your favorite doggie bed and you were calm and we held you as theVet gave you the sedative. I was upset that the sedative worked so fast as I felt like I didn't say everything to you I wanted to you went to sleep almost instantly and you werr snoring so loudly just like you always did at night when you slept between us on our pillows. Then when the final shot came I was holding you and kissing your ears and I could actually feel the life leave you, you kind of took a big sigh and that was it, you went limp and at that very moment I felt a piece of me leave my body as well, a part of my heart and my soul and I have never felt the same since then my sweet girl.  This past year has been so difficult for me as I have never experienced such a painful loss in my life. I have lost close family members but the pain has never been like this. My mom said that it is because you were my child, you really were. You werethere for me all those painful years when I suffered miscarriages and could not get pregnant. All you had to do was curl up next to me and look at me with those big brown loving eyes and things were always a little bit better. Then when I finally did with twins you hung in there for me and got to see my babies born. I remember when I was on bed rest and I was not supposed to carry you up and down the stairs anymore you just couldn't bear it if I gated you downstairs nor did I want you away from me anyways so I got on my hands and knees with my big old pregnant belly and I helped you up each and every stair and it took us a long time but we both made it, HA!  I will always miss you my sweet friend, you are my true soul mate and there will never be another dog that will touch my heart in the way that you did. I do hope you can forgive me for trying to do the right thing in taking away your suffering and that you are ok up at the Bridge and that we will see each other one day again.

You are in my heart forever Mrs. P, Peeps and will never ever be forgotten.
Mommy, Daddy, Jenna, Kaylee, and Baby Girl


Posts: 657

kdclairmo, I am just so very sorry.  Your baby was a beauty.  My little girl was part beagle and they are just the very best.  I am at three months almost and the pain is unbearable.  I am crying now as I read your post.  I am like you--have lost four close family members, but nothing has ever hurt like this and I don't suppose it ever will.  Again, I feel for you on this day.  This is the only place in the world I can say what I feel and this is probably true for everyone who comes here. 


Posts: 991
I am so deeply moved by what you wrote to Peanut. You loved each other so much. I think she knows that you did what was best for her, but it was certainly not what you wanted. I think all of us here can relate to that feeling.

Molly says: HAPPY ONE YEAR BRIDGE DAY PEANUT!!! Come by Molly's Fine Biscut Shoppe with all your friends here and it's free unlimited biscuits all around.

Find some peace today. Think about all the sweet endearing things your precious Peanut did. Find a little peace in that.
Molly's MOm

Posts: 258
Dear Peanut's Mommy,

There just are no words to describe the pain of losing one so very dear to our hearts as our little ones are.  Time helps us manage, but never takes away our pain.  Your sweet Peanut is so beautiful...Beagles are such smart, good pups.  I can see how you would be so completely in love with your girl.  The memories of losing our babies never seem to dim.  I also remember the details surrounding my Max's death in December, and the self-doubt and even guilt over my decision to let him go sometimes come rushing back at me.  What I know in my head about that being the best choice, and what I feel in my heart are two different things.

Peanut indeed was and is your child.  She will never leave your heart.

Happy 1 year Bridge Day sweet Peanut!  I hope that Betsy WooWooWoo brings one of her famous roasted chickens to your Bridge Day celebration.  Max will make you a big cream puff with a candle in it for you...but you may find he has taken a bite out of it first (he is not always so good at sharing, but he tries!).  Send your Mommy a sign that you are with her.  She misses you so!


 Warm Hugs,



Posts: 180
Although it brought tears to my eyes, I enjoyed your story about Peanut, especially the part about you crawling up the stairs.  She must have been such a love.

I am so sorry for your suffering.  It's unfortunate that eventually sorrow is the price we pay for loving our fur babies so much.  Their lives are always too short.

Hugs, peace and comfort to you and your family.


Posts: 881
Dear Karen,

I've been with you since my Cicio left in Nov.  I know how very difficult losing Peanut has been for you.  And these anniversary dates are the worst thing to go through..they have been for me. 

From everything you've said there's been nothing but love between the two of you and certainly Peanut is not judging you...only you are.  He's only known your love and protection the entire time he was blessed to be in your home.  He was a very lucky do to have such a good mom.

The golden thread that binds your hearts together will never be broken.  Peanut is with you today as you are with him.

Wishing you only beautiful memories of lives well spent together.

Many hugs,


Posts: 1,400
Dear Peanuts Mom:
I know this day is extremely hard for you.  My heart goes out to you and I wish I could easy your pain.  What a beautiful sweet picture of Peanut.  I wish Peanut a Happy 1st Bridge Day.  Your memories of today are heartbreaking but I know that you gave Peanut all the love you had to give.  You will see Peanut again in happiness and peace.

I lost my Sweetheart Meister 6/6/08.  My heart is broken into a million pieces and I find it hard getting through the day also.

I will pray for Peanut.


Posts: 190

While We Are Apart I Will Hold You In
My Heart and Never Let You Go 

Distance may separate us,
But my heart will never let you go;
For I carry a part of you...
With me always;
It keeps me going through the day...
It brings a smile to my face...
And tears to my eyes 

It is a part of my dreams,
That I live for and cherish;
That part is my wish, my only one,
To see you again;
I know that wish will someday come true,
But for now I will hold in my heart;
The memory of you...
And never let you go. 

Author Unknown


Posts: 1,015

Dearest Karen –

I have been reading your posts since I came to petloss in March, only 4 months ago, and I know how you have so agonized over your decision, having this self-doubt and guilt. I know we all struggle with the “choice” of helping our babies make that transition to the Rainbow Bridge. I so hope you start to give yourself a break. I know we can’t help it; it seems to be our human nature to go to these “gremlin-like” places in our minds. But our babies (and yes, you’re right, they are our babies,) they only know the deep and unconditional love we share. You gave all you could to your sweet little girl; love, care, devotion, a warm bed, warm hugs and warm kisses. Your very last BRAVE act of kindness was releasing her from her tired body. She will be forever grateful to you for helping her make her transition and setting her free in such a gentle way.


I know all of these words don’t change what is our reality – that our babies are gone from our presence. But I have to believe, because if I don’t I’m sure I’d go crazy, that their spirits are all around us, and they live on in our hearts. I know our babies didn’t want to say goodbye to us, as much as we didn’t want to say goodbye to them, yet they looked to us to help them, because they trusted us to take care of them, just as we always had during their lives.


Pleases know you’re always in my thoughts and I’m sending you a warm hug today, as you remember your sweet baby girl, Peanut, on her 1 year anniversary at the Rainbow Bridge.


Dear Peanut, please know that your family, and most especially your mommy are sending you extra special love today – they love and miss you so much. Please be sure to send them a sign to let them know you’re well & happy. Love to you sweet Peanut. P.S. Enjoy Betsy Noodle’s roast chicken and Molly’s fantastic biscuits.


With much affection,


Rusty’s Mom – Allison.  


Posts: 493

I am sobbing as I read your beautiful post to Peanut. It is so beautiful, so full of your pure love for her. My heart aches for you and for me, as I am dreading Chiquita's b-day next month, and her 1 yr. Bridge Day this Labor Day. Wow, how much our lives have changed since then. I know the pain and the sadness that you have, because as you know I feel the same. Our furbabies changed our lives when they came to us and again when they left us, now all we have is the memories and a broken heart.
Your Peanut will for always live in your heart, and I know she's looking down at you and your family and sending you her love from the Bridge.
Always thinking of you and your Peanut...

Many Hugs,
Chiquita's Mom


Posts: 1,415
Dear Karen-- I'm truly thinking of you today on Peanut's 1-year Bridge Day.  It must be so hard reaching this milestone and still having such vivid memories of your precious girl. 
    We all put those "what if's"  into our vocabulary many times, but when it comes down to it, an extra day here or there doesn't amount to much in the long term. I think it only extends their existence and not their lives.  The quality is gone and the pain & suffering would closely follow.  That you would never want to happen.  It sounds to me that the bond between you and Peanut was so close and she knew how much she was loved.  I believe that you all felt it was the right time. 
    I'm so sorry that you're feeling the sorrow & grief that accompanies this incredible loss.  I, too, have had those same feelings for the past 7 1/2 months and I don't see an end in sight.  I hope that we all can find some peace on this sad journey we find ourselves experiencing.

             You are in my thoughts & prayers--- Teddy's Mom

Posts: 536

I am just so very sorry. My thoughts are with you on the 1 year bridge anny for your sweet Peanut. Reading your post about Peanut too brought tears to my eyes. Next Thursday, June 26th will be my Nikki's 1 yr. bridge anny. I too am dreading this day. I have been feeling sick to my stomach just knowing what happened on that night. Again my thoughts are with you.

Many ((((hugs))))
Nikki's Mom



Posts: 577
I am so sorry for this hard day approaching.   It was super hard for me.   Please know you are in my thoughts.

So many hugs...
Merry's mom

Posts: 1,040
Oh my  tears are flowing while reading your post of Your sweet Peanut,what a beautiful baby she is,I know how hard it is on  our babies special days,My Sammy sus has been gone for 4 yrs. to the bridge,and I still cry for her and miss her so much yet,I know my heart will heal completely  when I go to the Bridge and hold her in my arms and shower her with all my love and kisses,my world ended the day she went to the bridge. I know your baby is watching down on you & your family,she'll always be the protector of those babies she had to leave behind,I'am so sorry your little sweetheart  could not stay and watch your twins grow up,buit she'll still watch them,for she loves them very much just like she loves you & your husband.Take care and  I'll be saying prayers for you and Peanut.
What a wonderful tribute it was  just beautiful.God Bless you.
Healing hugs.
        {{{{{{{{ PEANUT}}}}}}}Have fun sweet girl today is your special day.sending Many  hugs and Butterfly Kisses to you on your day.
JoAnn Sammy Sus's Mom


Posts: 228
Dear Karen,

The anniversaries of your sweet Peanut going to Rainbow Bridge and leaving you behind are always very difficult.  There is such grief that you will always live with, but you live with the Joy that Peanut was such a part of your life for so many years.  Think today on all the beautiful things that you and Peanut did together through the years.  Let these beautiful memories hold you close and comfort you.  I remember you saying how much you loved to nibble at Peanuts ears so I am sure that Peanut is whispering to you how much she knows you still love her.  Peanut is as near as your heart.


Posts: 5,100
Dearest Karen and family,

I have followed all your threads and posts since I came to PL last fall when I knew I would soon have to say goodbye to my beloved Betsy.   Your love for Peanut is so deep, so enduring.   And, when I look into Peanut's beautiful eyes in that photo, I can totally understand your sorrow.  She is simply beautiful.

Karen, what a phenomenal story of you crawling up the stairs with her, one at a time, heavy with your pregnancy.   Let me tell you, dear friend, that girl KNEW without a doubt she was so LOVED.  And, forgive you for sending her to the Bridge?  I truly believe, after reading all your posts, Peanut BLESSED you and was SO PROUD that you had the strength to help her to the Bridge that day.   She was so blessed by your selfless actions of that day.  

I, too, made the sign of the cross on my beloved Betsy's forehead.  In my agonizing grief, before I was to take her to put her to sleep, I suddenly had the urge to baptize her.  I was beside myself with grief, and I thought (irrationally), "What if she isn't allowed into Heaven?"  As I dipped my fingers in the holy water, this quiet, inner voice came to me as if to say, "Why are you baptizing this perfect, innocent soul?  She has no original sin."  And, suddenly my heart was at peace.

One day, dear Karen, you and your entire family WILL be reunited with your beloved Peanut.  Until that day, she will always be watching over each of you...and loving you still.


Hugs and Peace to you,
Betsy's forever mom

Posts: 686
Dear Karen

You had such a special bond with sweet Peanut.  I know this is a terribly sad milestone, but I hope you can find comfort in knowing that you gave Peanut a wonderful loving life.  It hurts so much to lose them, but we can be thankful for all of the joy and love they brought us.

Happy 1 year bridge day Peanut.  You are such a precious baby and your mommy loves and misses you so much.

Kate (Gus' mom)


Posts: 1,093

I am in tears, and my heart is touched, by reading your post to Peanut. One year. I don't know how any of us get through these days, these months, and eventually years, without our companions by our side. I know it has been such a hard year for you, and I can feel in your words the pain and sorrow that is still with you. I guess, for some of us, that pain does not go away. We learn to live with it -- to act like we are living with it, really -- but it does not go away.

My heart is with you. I know that Peanut is safe, and loved, at the Bridge and is forever by your side in spirit. I know that there are many, many there with her that will watch over her. My Molly is there - I know it. And, I know that she and Peanut helped us become friends, helped us to help support each other through this heartache.

I send you love and the biggest of hugs, Karen.


Posts: 261

Dearest Karen,

What can I say that has not already been said?  Pure and simple love is what you shared with each other.  Completely uncomplicated, unconditional LOVE!
What a blessing she was to you and you to her!  As I read through your post I realize the twins arrived before she went to the Bridge.  I'm so glad she was able to leave alittle part of herself with them before she had to go.  I even wonder if she didn't hang on for you knowing that once the girls were here maybe it wouldn't be quite as painful for you.  She loved you that much you know!
God gives us these "kids"......they're gifts!  In my own heart I think he gave you "P" until he was ready to bless you with the twins.  I don't know why I feel that way, I just do!  I believe "P" is your "Heartdog".  He's always with you, he's never left, and is watching over you and your beautiful family everyday of your life!  That is a gift Karen! Cherish it(Him), I know you do!
But please don't be sad.  Peanut wouldn't want his memory to make you sad. He was a Joy to you, let him see you smile and remember him with all the love you still hold in your heart for him!

Dear Sweet Peanut!  Happy 1 year BridgeDay Babygirl! I know you will celebrate it with style!  Your momma still misses you terribly.  We're trying to help, but I think if you could find a way to visit and give her a sign that you're okay, she'd feel a whole lot better!  Let her know, you're always with her, by her side, as close as her heart!  And let her know there is nothing to has always been and still is sweetest right by her side!

Peace to you my dear friend!
Donna(Rudy & Rileysmom)


Posts: 2,245
Dearest Karen:
Well here we are again; still in tears and still in pain.  Tomorrow is Christopher's 15 month Bridge day and not a lot has changed since the day he left.  I know that your life is much the same as mine.  Our day will come Karen when we will be with them again.  I know that Peanut and Christopher are together and I know they will wait for us.  But for now, enjoy your beautiful babies.  I am always here for you and will be Forever. 

Love and Big Hugs
Georgeann and Christopher

Posts: 440

As I read your post I had tears in my eyes.  What beautiful words for your sweet Peanut.  So much of what you wrote especially about Peanuts last day could have been my own.  I think that last day with Jasmine and in our case having to make decisions so quickly as she was in such distress with haunt me the rest of my life.  I still miss her so and like you I truly feel I lost my child that day.  Jasmine was the first in my household too and saw me through two pregnancies as well as a host of other milestones.  I think of that sweet girl every day and I know I'll miss her for the rest of my days here on earth.

Like you, I try to find comfort that she's okay at Rainbow Bridge and one day we will be reunited.  Take good care on this most difficult of anniversaries.  I hope Peanut and Jasmine have found each other along with all the other wonderful and tremendously loved babies who have passed on.

                                     Hugs to you and your family,

                                             JasminesMom (Kathy)

Jasmine, Never Far From My Thoughts and
Always in My Heart!!!!!


Posts: 540
I just want to tell you all I am sitting here in tears after reading all of your beautiful posts to me regarding Peanut's 1 year bridge day anniersary. It was an extremely painful, sad day for me but I did get thru it and today is a little better.  Knowing I have such wonderful caring friends on this website that reached out to me in my desperate time of need really warms my heart and soul.  God bless you all and may He help you heal from your pain of your losses as well and bring comfort to you in knowing all of our beloved furbabies are healthy and happy and more importantly TOGETHER as we all are and that we will see them again some day.

Thank you all again so very very much. You helped make my horrible week more bearable and you got me thru a very painful time in my life.



Posts: 445
Karen I know this has been a hard year for you and I know I too wish I could have had just a few more days.  Oh to go back in time, after more than a year I am still missing my two.  You were a wonderful mom to peanut and you were lucky to have had each other.


Posts: 909





Dear Mommy,

I'm happy at the Bridge

I run and play all day

It seems like only yesterday

Since I had to go away.


There is only one thing

I'm missing it is true

And that's what I'll have

When again I'm with you.


Puppy Kisses,

Mrs. P. Peeps



Happy Bridge Day Peanut



Love and Blessings,

Carewolf aka Carol



Posts: 1,205
Dear Karen

So sorry I am late posting, but I am thinking of you, and your precious Peanut.  HAPPY BRIDGE DAY PEANUT, FOREVER IN YOUR MUMMIES HEART.

Love Di xxx

Posts: 1,569
I will say a little extra prayer tonight over our Peaches resting spot like i have done since she left on her journey a month ago. Your tribute was very touching and I could feel your love for your Peanut. We also have a beagle that looks like your sweet Peanut. Pokey is her name and she too unfortunately is getting old. Her muzzle and head are almost pure white but she still is doing ok. I too owe a debit of gratitude to all of those here who have helped me cope with our loss.
I will ask Peach tonight to tell Peanut just how lucky she was to have a family like yours. God Bless you and yours---Jerry & Gwen in Oklahoma.

Peanut, Happy One Year at the bridge, you were a fortunate girl to have had such a loving family.

Posts: 139
Dear Karen,

I am so sorry that you are suffering with this loss.  But I just wanted to let you know that from reading this post and others I can feel the love that you have for your precious Peanut.  If I can feel it just from reading your post, 
I know your Peanut felt it.  We are so lucky to have found our Heartdogs and we had such happy times with them.  It is so sad that they are no longer with us here but we will be with them once again, I just know that.  It sounds like your Peanut love you even more, I am sure all our animals know that they were loved, how could they not?  If we can feel it, I know they can too.

When you have to put them to sleep, you know your doing the best thing.  I know there is no way you would have considered doing that unless you knew it had to be done.  And if I know it just from what you write, your Peanut knew it too.  Your Peanut was a great dog only because you were such a great Mom.  Your dog lived a great life with you and your family and to Peanut all she really wanted in life was to be loved and you sure gave Peanut all that and more.  Peanut knew how much love there was and loved you back the same.  That bond you both have can never be broken and when the time finally comes, it will be your Peanut that will run up to you like a young pup and give you all those kisses that you are so desperately missing right now.  I really believe that they will make up for all the time that they missed with us and we will too.  Just think about that reunion.

I hope and pray that tomorrow is a little easier for you and you always have that special bond for the rest of your life.


Posts: 613

Dear Karen, every time I see Peanut's photo, I say out loud, God, what an adorable little girl, indeed she was precious, and much loved.   My thoughts are with you and your family as you remember your beloved girl on her one year bridge day.   Hugs, MsSavion


Posts: 540
Thank you all again so much for all the love and support you have shown me these last several days and helped me thru my sweet Peanut's one year bridge day. You all really helped me get thru a terrible time in my life and I will forever be greatful. I do feel a little better this week, it feels like a big weight has been lifted off my heart a little and I have been trying really hard to remember some of the funny, loving times I shared with her and not that last day and it has helped. I still feel like something is missing from my heart.. the joy she brought me every day and I think I may always feel that way but again the last few days have been a little easier.

To Carol: thank you so much for making me that Rainbow Bridge photo of Peanut, oh it borught me to tears.. it is soooo beautfiul. Is there a way that I can use that on my message board posts. Can you send me the address that I can plug in to use it or is that not possible. In any case I really appreciate what you have done for me. You are such a sweet person to do that for all of us that have asked you too. Caringwolf is a great name for you because you truly care about all of us.

I wish you all peace and comfort from your losses whether they be new or older...



Posts: 438
Dear Peanut,
  You have been gone for one year now.  I know you are in good health, young again and healthy and happy, except of course, you miss your mom.  You will see her again one day.  She loves you so much and misses you every day.  She writes of you so much, we all feel like we know and love you too.

Give Scruffy and Gimli kisses for me, and I hope that when you went to the bridge that Scruffy met you there.  I hope that you were greeting Gimli when he arrived. 

  Watch over your precious mama from heaven, and celebrate your joy at the bridge. 

Scruffysmom forever
Still greiving Gimli

Posts: 540
Dear Bev, thank you so much for your lovely letter to my Peanut, that was just too sweet of you. The love and comfort shown by all of you on this board is just too much. I feel like I have made some wonderful lifelong friends here and I thank you for that.  Yes I am sure Scruffy met P at the bridge and showed her the "ropes" and that they both met your sweet Gimli as well and showed him around as well and that they are all romping and playing with all of the beloved furbabies from all my friends here.

Peace and comfort to you all.



Posts: 438
Dear Peanut,
  You have been gone for one year now.  I know you are in good health, young again and healthy and happy, except of course, you miss your mom.  You will see her again one day.  She loves you so much and misses you every day.  She writes of you so much, we all feel like we know and love you too.

Give Scruffy and Gimli kisses for me, and I hope that when you went to the bridge that Scruffy met you there.  I hope that you were greeting Gimli when he arrived. 

  Watch over your precious mama from heaven, and celebrate your joy at the bridge. 

Scruffysmom forever
Still greiving Gimli

Posts: 909
Yes there is a way to use the pictures for posts.

They are all saved in an album at photobucket for you.

Just right-click the picture and go to properties.
You will get the URL to your picture.


This code is what you paste in the image box

on the page.


If you want to make it smaller,

I don't suggest that for your water picture

for it is a gif,

you can resize it.

Your reflection picture code.






Posts: 251

I often read your posts and see your gorgeous picture of your Peanut and he really touches me and sometimes I just can't get his gorgeous photo out of my head...he is just so gorgeous, I can really see the love in his eyes. One year without your Peanut, the time flies yet our hearts are so empty without our babies. YOur story sounds so like mine, Nugget would dry my tears as every month I found out I wasn't pregnant...heavily pregnant, I would kneel down and lift him onto my bed...your Peanut was your world, your baby boy, your soulmate...

Happy 1st Bridge Day sweet boy. I just love your picture, you always brighten my day when I read your mummy's posts....brighten your Mummy's day and come and visit her, she misses you so much.

She loves you as much or even more than the day you left.

Karen, I am thinking of you and your Peanut on this special day. I will light a candle for you,

Love Nuggetsmum Alana

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