Registered: 1568561937 Posts: 2
Yesterday my baby, Puddin, crossed the rainbow bridge and to say I am struggling is an understatement. His sister, Coco, passed last July which was also very devastating but we had each other. Now that he is gone, my place just feels so empty, to quiet. I live on my own with no other pets. Anyone else in a similar situation? How have you coped with the grieving in a now empty house? Definitely experiencing the "Dead House" affect and I'm struggling with it. I appreciate the support.
Registered: 1564505271 Posts: 26
Lghantt...I lost my snorkie Taz seven weeks ago today, and I'm like you, faced with an empty house and no one else to live or grieve with. And, yes, it's very hard. Some days have gotten better than others, but I still see Taz everywhere. How have I coped with it? Well, this may sound a little kooky, but I still image that I see and hear him and talk to him as though he's still here. I open the back door to let him out and back in while imaging that I see him through the windows. I can see him sniffing around, barking at the squirrels, and doing his business in his favorite places after investigating the perfect place. It was his yard, and he made sure that anything that happened to venture into it would know the yard was taken. I just noticed yesterday that the squirrels have now become braver and encroaching all the way to the patio. They sense that something's different now. Taz would go nuts if they ever came up that far to his house. I pretend I let him back in the house, pretend I give him his treat, and I see him go back to his favorite ottoman satisfied he still rules here. Also, every time I leave or arrive at my house upon opening the door I say "Bye, Taz. Be back in a little while," or "Taz, I'm home." And I always see his little face looking at me and I know he understands. As far as the emptiness in the house, yes it's amazing just how quiet it can be sometimes. But, we have to carry on. I pray to God every night that he's in a good place and doesn't hurt anymore. I also pray that we'll be together again some day. I hope this helps...
Registered: 1568057584 Posts: 25
I am so sorry for your loss of Puddin. My heart aches for you. I just lost my dog last week, She was (18) and I miss her terribly. I can relate about about the empty house feeling. I think many of the people on this forum are faced with similar circumstances. I'm sure you're feeling a whole spectrum of emotions right now. That's perfectly normal. Allow yourself to cry, scream and vent your emotions. I have been calling a lot of my friends. Most have been very receptive and allow me to express my grief. I also started to keep a journal of all the wonderful memories that I had with my beloved dog. She lived to be (18) so we had a ton of them. Very simply, I just write down whatever comes to mind. I just finished up right before I read your post. Maybe, tomorrow I'll write a little more. We'll see. Glad that you joined this forum. I t can be helpful. First and foremost, just get your grief out in the open so you can deal with it on your own terms. Just take it one day at a time. Let the tears flow freely. You are not alone. We're here for you. Jim
Registered: 1567693367 Posts: 38
I am so very sorry for your loss and feel your pain.. I lost my 15 year old Chihuahua last month and also lived alone and I know what you mean by 'a dead house'! You have probably heard this before but the grief will take time and you will experience all sorts of emotions, everyone is different but please do not for any reason feel guilty about anything, as most people experience this emotion and they really beat themselves up about it, myself included. I have no one to talk to about my baby when I come home or wake up in the morning and it is a very lonely place but people have convinced me that thing's will get better and they will for you too, just take thing's at your own pace, cry , shout, do whatever works for you, there is no right or wrong..I have watched more TV than usual, have taken walks alone in peaceful places with beautiful nature, have bought a book on pet bereavement (thank goodness they exist) and have reached out to people on this board who you will get wonderful support from, so please keep posting. Daisy was my 1st dog and I rescued her. She was always in my arms and I couldn't stop kissing her beautiful sweet face. Us pet lovers are blessed - we have an affinity with them, connect with them and have a special bond that non pet owners or people who don't particularly like animals have, and afterwards it is expressed through tears of sadness when we part with them, because we love... You will heal, we all will! Be kind to yourself, your baby would want you to be and keep posting because we are here to support each other. Sending you comfort. Hug babydaisy
Registered: 1568561937 Posts: 2
I appreciate all of you writing back with support and your stories. Yesterday was equally as hard as the day I said goodbye. I've transitioned a little from hating my place to just sad being there because that was the home he loved, too. I see his favorite spots, where he ate. It's lonely...but I've recognized it's not just lonesome for companionship. I miss him, his quirks and personality. I know the next one (probably get 2 again) will not be the same. I'll love as much, but you know what I mean. I'm also at a point since this came on suddenly to me (I think he was hiding some of his pain but showing through extra cuddles and lap sitting starting around June/July) that I question why? how? when? I was just expecting to have him around for a few more years. I had just returned from vacation so I'm so thankful I could be with him and he died in my lap so it was the best it could have been, I think. I just miss him and it's hard. Again, really appreciate the support.