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Capella

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Posts: 1
 #1 
On Monday evening I was cleaning the house and let my 2 dogs out , Ella was almost 5 months old. I got busy with cleaning and didn’t hear her whining to come in so I just assumed she was playing with my other dog Bandit. 15-20 min later I wondered why she wasn’t whining to come in as she always does. Well when she didn’t come when I called my heart was in my throat and I knew. I never thought about the pool thawing. It’s covered by a layer of water was over the tarp and I found her floating there. I screamed and screamed and pulled her lifeless body out and I knew she was gone. There was bloody foam coming from her mouth and I tried to pump her chest . I keep playing this over and over in my head and I hate my self. I feel tremendous guilt and I just can’t deal with this. I can’t sleep, I can’t concentrate to work. She was my little baby and didn’t think. I was stupid and I can’t forgive myself. I need help.
BoltsMom

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Posts: 2
 #2 
I am so deeply sorry for this tragic accident that occurred.  I know it must be extremely painful and hard not to blame yourself but please try to remember that you are only human.  We all make mistakes and many times it is only luck that saves us from disaster.  Your Ella was clearly loved and that is the most important thing any of us can receive in this life on earth- no matter how long or short our time is.  With all of their exuberance, puppies often times get themselves into dangerous and troublesome situations.  It happens a million times every day- somewhere.  Whether it's a sock being swallowed or a puppy bolting out from a yard- terrible accidents happen but often times no one is to blame.  I know there isn't much that can be said to make you feel better but please know you are not alone in your grief, regrets, or guilt.  We all have those terrible feelings.  It will get better, but it will take time and there will be ups and downs.  Keep reaching out, find a pet loss group in your area, and talk about your grief- it truly does help.  I'm so sorry again for the loss of your beloved Ella.  Sending you hugs and hoping your heart finds peace..
emjl81

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Posts: 7
 #3 
I am so sorry for your unfortunate tragic loss. You did what you could to act. I am so sorry. This is a great place for support. 
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