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srlara9

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Posts: 3
 #1 
Let me start by saying I’ve owned pets my whole life and never in my life imagined having to give one up, but here I am. 4 years ago we lost our Burmese Mountain Dog Lucky after 17 years. My whole family was devastated, but we felt lucky and blessed to have had him so long. My husband, who had had Lucky since he was a teenager wasn’t ready for another dog, aside from our other rescued Bichon we still had. However after 3 years, while flipping through Facebook, he saw a post about a dog he literally fell in love with a first sight. We drove to the shelter the next day with 3 kids and a dog in toe. He was a beautiful 111 pound Mastiff who immediately greeted all 3 of my children with kisses and engaged in a game of chase with my grumpy 12 year old Bichon. It was perfect, we all fell in love and took him home the same day. There were obstacles, he was huge and could easily jump our fences. We took out a loan and did a $20,000 dollar yard remodel. He would drag me around when trying to walk him, so we joined a trainer on Sunday hikes to better socialize him and teach him how to walk properly. He had a very sensitive stomach so we consulted the vet tried a huge variety of foods until we found one that got him back on track. After a few months it seemed all the obstacles were behind us and we settled in as a family. About 6 months into having him he started to show leash aggression with other dogs. It got to the point where I was afraid to walk him because if he saw another dog or cat he would charge and I didn’t want him to get away from me. He also started to not like people he didn’t know coming into the house and would bark and lunge when they would enter. We started him putting him in the yard when he had company to keep everyone safe. Yes, he had these issues but with his family he couldn’t have been more sweet, calm and gentle. We spent so many days out in the yard as a family and he would just walk from person to person getting love and scratches from whoever he could. He adored my kids and would greet them so happily every time he saw them. But that all changed drastically. We took him for all his two year vaccines last Friday night and by Saturday he was treating my 2 sons (age 6 and 8) like they were strangers, barking and lunging at them whenever they walked by. I took him back to our vet, went to a holistic vet, called a behaviorist, and even an animal communicator and nobody can figure out the issue or how to fix it. After long discussions with all these people and my husband, we have decided we have no choice but to rehome the dog. The rescue we got him from is currently searching for the right place for him, and have said he will be leaving in about two weeks. I’m dreading each day the closer we get. I know we can’t keep him and I have to put my kid’s safety above all else, but it’s still killing me. This is the dog that helped me through the death of my grandmother who raised me, who helped to pull me out of a depression and kept my anxiety at bay. He became my protector, my security. Not a night has gone by in a year when I haven’t sat outside with him after everyone has gone to bed sitting with his giant head in my lap looking up at the stars. But now when we do it it’s bittersweet because I’m filled with dread and the feeling of loss. I can’t imagine life without my friend. I can’t handle the fact that I won’t be able to take care of him anymore and make sure he’s okay. I cant comprehend never seeing him again. Having him live his whole life without me in it. These beautiful creatures are only with us for such a short time as it is , but our time together will be cut even shorter. I feel cheated of all the years we could have enjoyed together. Of the life we’ll no longer have together. I don’t understand what happened. I’m angry that life seems so unfair. I’m worried about his future and I feel my hands are tied, forced to make a decision that’s breaking my heart: I’m trying to have faith and tell myself that everything happens for a reason, but it’s a hard pill to swallow. Losing Lucky was awful, but at least I got to be with him until the end. I knew I did all I could for him, this somehow seems even worse. I don’t know how I’m going to do this. I feel like I’m falling apart.
GoldenMom

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Posts: 22
 #2 
srlara9, I’m very sorry for the pain you are feeling. It’s an awful decision you’ve had to make. My heart breaks for you because I can tell how very much you love your dog. Will the rescue organization let you be involved in choosing his new home? Would you be able maintain some contact when he is in his new home so you know how he is doing? It may offer you some comfort. Know though that you have done so much and be gentle on yourself because you’ve gone through a great deal.
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