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Mindy25312

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Posts: 3
 #1 
This is going to be a long, lonely night.  My 14-yr. old cocker spaniel was diagnosed several months ago with lung cancer.  The vet suggested that we put him on palliative treatment to give him a good quality of life until he passed.  I thought I had prepared myself for his passing, but right now it feels like someone has ripped my heart out. Rocky very suddenly took a turn for the worse a couple of hours ago.  He didn't want to eat (which was unusual) and had a slight seizure.  Within minutes, he was gone.

Rocky was always there for me to love me and help me through the bad times.  He was my "heart dog", and it's hard to imagine life without him. 

My heart goes out to everyone that has lost a pet.  It's the most terrible, empty feeling.  It's not something that you can prepare for, that's for sure.

Godspeed to the Bridge, Rocky.  I will always love you.
Please give me a sign that you're okay.

Mindy
cosesmom

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Posts: 580
 #2 
Oh Mindy,
I feel so bad for you. I know how much you hurt. I do love your description of Rocky being your "heart dog" I had one too and lost him Sept. 18th. I lost my soul mate in 2000 and (like you) my Heart dog just a couple months ago.
I am so glad you were there for him  as he was for you all those years. Watch the stars for a sign. I was so lost the night I lost Termy and went outside to talk him. Wanting to know if he was okay and there wasn't a single star out and then one appeared. It twinkled. I think it was him telling me he was okay so every night I go out and it's still there only glowing brighter. You will get a sign and it  will be very special for you.
You sound like you were very dedicated and loyal mom. I am so glad you had each other.
Love and doggie hugs
Termy's mom
Mindy25312

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Posts: 3
 #3 
Dear Cosesmom,
Bless you for writing, and I'm so sorry to hear about both the loss of your soul mate and Heart dog. My husband & I just had a little ceremony and burial for Rocky up on the hill, overlooking our house and where I always walk the dogs.  It's a beautiful wooded area, and I think Rocky would have liked that for a final resting place. I plan to go up there a lot and talk to him, just as you said you do with Termy. 

I loved your description of the sign that you received from Termy.  I'm so happy to tell you that I received a sign this morning.  I was in the living room and heard the doggy door open and close.  I thought to myself it's one of the dogs, but I looked and they were both with me.  I believe Rocky's spirit is still with us, and I have such a good feeling about that.

I would love to hear about your Heart dog sometime, your soul mate too if it helps you to talk about that subject.   

Big hugs to you!
Mindy
cosesmom

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Posts: 580
 #4 
Mindy,
I hope you are doing well. I know it's hard to lose the ones we love. I am happy that you found a perfect spot for Rocky. I've been afraid to have a funeral for Termy and Dakota. The reason being is I had a very special dog many years ago when I was married before and I buried him on my fifteen acre farm never guessing I wouldn't be there forever. I feel bad that he was left there and I worry about what will happen to his grave now that someone else lives there so I've made up my mind that when I die I want Dakota's (soul mate) and Termy's (my heart dog) ashes buried with me. That way we will always be together, forever.
Yes, talking to them does help and I want to believe that they here us, always. We really don't have to say that we love you to them because they know but it makes us feel better, I think.
I love the fact that Rocky paid you a visit. That is wonderful. I so much would love to hear Termy. What I wouldn't give to hear a huff. He always did that. We called him Mr. discuss. Rocky will always be by your side.I know even if I never feel or hear from Termy he will always take care of me.
I have a post on this site with pictures of Termy, if you would like to see him also I have a tribute too with pictures. My post with his pictures is titled "Termy's gone" One of them is a younger picture and one is a picture a week or so before he left for the Bridge. Yes, sharing my life stories of them does help. I know I will cry talking about them but that only means I haven't forgotten them.
Dakota was a mix as was Termy. He was Rottie and German Shepard. Big too, he weighed 135 pounds. Very beautiful to. He looked like long haired Rottweiler. I lost him when he was only 6 years old. Not long enough to see his muzzle turn gray. He developed pancreatitis. I took him to the vet on a Friday night so they could re hydrate him but he passed in the night. I will never get over the guilt that I said "bye Code, be a good boy" I should have never said good bye. He was from my first marriage and very protective of me. I thought moving and starting a new life would be good for us but we didn't share our new life for very long. He used to sit in my lap. I miss him so much. That's when I got Termy. Someone abandoned him and my daughter found him just 10 months after losing Dakota. I wasn't sure I wanted another dog because of the pain of losing them but I cried and told my husband that he needed a home and love and I had so much love to give. I gave him a home. What a ride him and I had. For over 16 years we were together. He rode Harleys, went with me to work for years. Everyone he met loved him. We had a motorcycle rally here in Erie and he was the mascot. When I got him he could fit in the palm of your hand. He was perfect. A mix of Pomeranian and Chihuahua. He looked like short haired Pom. For the last two years he was on heart meds because of a murmur. That was under control but I couldn't have his teeth cleaned because of his bad heart and I wonder if he stopped eating because of his teeth. I'll never know now. He always weighed 13 pounds and the over last year he lost 1/4 of his weight so I'm not sure if it was his teeth or something else. I knew he was fading away. When he got to where I had to force his meds down because he wouldn't eat cheese, I knew we were closing in on our last days. When it came to food, he would eat anything. I couldn't the hurt I was inflicting on him by forcing medication. I think he was telling me in his own way. I will write you another time if you want to share our stories. I would so love to hear about Rocky too. I hope I didn't over do writing you. Sorry if I did. It just feels so good to talk to someone who cares.
Please feel free to share Rocky with me when your ready.
Love and doggie hugs
Termy's mom (Bonnie)
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