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Posts: 14
My cat, Cleanne, passed away in December and I am still struggling. Why am I living in a world of such regret and guilt over this loss? She was loved and spoiled by everyone and yet I feel I failed her somehow. I miss her so much.

Posts: 580
Dearest Cleanne's mom,
What you are feeling is normal. Just give yourself time. Everyone of us need to heal on our own time. Guilt and regret are some of the steps we take when we loss a loved one. It's been over 19  months since I let Termy go and I still have days when it feels like yesterday but I have good days to where I can remember the journey Termy I took for over 16 years. We never fail our babies, this is a humane emotion grown from guilt. We were loved and we loved deeply. Be gentle with yourself.
Love and doggie hugs
Termy's mom

Posts: 14
Thank you for your response.  It helped.  I just struggle because the emotions are so intense.  The intensity of the guilt and regret almost convinces me that I failed in so many ways.  It's so hard to fight through the grieving process.  I feel so many negative emotions and don't quite understand that.  It's not just sadness -- it's beating myself up -- and I don't even know what for.  I just feel awful.  I second guess the doctor towards the end of Cleanne's life --  maybe more could have been done for her?  It's just a vicious circle I am in now -- I guess 4 months isn't that long that the emotions are still so real.

Posts: 9
Im feeling i let down my love Roxy as well. I wish i could've done more for her I know in my heart I could have been there for her more. I even feel bad for hurting cause i know she wouldn't want to see me sad.

Posts: 171
I'm so sorry for everyone's pain.  We love our pets so deeply and their loss is a trauma and leaves a rift in our lives.  We all work through the grieving process in different ways and there's no set time limit.  I saw a counselor yesterday due to my river of grief, I think it helped a little but I know I still have a lot or work ahead of me, I know there will be more tears and regrets for a while.  Know that you are not alone, your feelings are acknowledged and it matters that you feel the way you are feeling.
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