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cat_mommy

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Posts: 2
 #1 
I've been down this road many times before - too many times, unfortunately.  Tabitha, my sweet 9-year old, died either late last night or early this morning.  I'd taken her to vet on Friday and the doctor had to do surgery to find out what was wrong (she'd been having a knot come up behind her ear, but lately, the knot would swell then go down, then come back up and seemed to be growing).  We'd been back and forth to the vet's since April with this (meds would improve the condition) and thought she was doing okay.

The vet thought I could pick her up yesterday, but she was still groggy from the surgery and she hadn't eaten.  But the office called late yesterday and said she was doing better; still hadn't eaten, but was more alert.  They said they'd call this morning with an update and that I should be able to take her home in the morning.

This morning, a little after 8:00, my phone rang; it was the vet.  She told me that Tabitha didn't make it.  The vet was as shocked as I am because she thought she was doing better.  (I don't blame the vet.  She has always provided excellent care to our fur-babies.)  Subconsciously, I think that I knew something might be wrong, but since animals are so excellent at hiding their illnesses, I thought it wouldn't be anything serious.  The vet did say that the location of where they had to do the surgery - with it being so close to the brain and whatever the growth was...well, it may have been cancer.  (When she had her first surgery in April, I chose not to send off what was removed because I thought if it is cancer, I'm not going to put her through a lot of treatments that are going to make her sicker.)

She was 9 years old and was a rescue - a stray that some of my co-workers found.  Knowing my love for animals (especially cats), they were certain I would take her home (and I did!).  Tabitha had an amazing personality and was one of the most loving cats I've ever known.  She also had an attitude and would swat any of the other cats who just happened to walk past her!

I cannot stop crying.  Everywhere I look, I'm reminded of her.  Even though we've moved her litterbox, feed and water dishes, and blanket, I can't move the memories of Tabitha.  The vet's office was kind enough to wait for us so we could pick her up this morning.  We buried her in the yard next to one of our other fur-kids (who I had to help to the Bridge a few months ago).

I know that God doesn't put more on us than we can handle, but as I have told people before, I think He has me confused with someone else.  Sometimes I am not sure how much more my heart can take.  Knowing that our other fur-kids need me will keep me going, but it's still so hard. 

If you've read this far, thank you.  The pain of losing a fur-child (since I don't have 2-legged children, the 4-legged ones ARE my children) is something I know you all can understand.  I guess I just needed to put into words how I feel.
Cecis_Mom

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Posts: 1,191
 #2 
Dearest Cat Mommy,
 
I am so very sorry to hear of your loss of Sweet Tabitha.
 
You were an angel to rescue such a precious soul.
 
I am also sorry to hear you have experienced back-to-back losses of another furchild.
 
We will be here to help you through these losses.  I hope you will continue to visit these message boards and share more about your precious furchildren when you are ready.
 
May God Bless You and Keep You in His Care,
 
Ceci's Mom (Robin) and Mama to Lil' Red, my precious boy
                                                                        and The Pinny Gig
 
                               ~ and Earth Furchild, Jack ("The Flying Cat')
judesmom

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Posts: 1,901
 #3 
cat mommy-i am so sorry to hear of your loss of your precious tabitha.   you were an angel to take her in and give her a very loving home.     even though she was still a young baby she had a wonderful life with you.    you could have given her no more than what you had.     her heart and soul soared off to the bridge bursting with love for her mom.     you gave her something very beautiful in your love and friendship and she returned it right back to you.
this bond that you and tabitha shared will never be broken-it will last for an eternity.    please know deep within yourself that she is happy and healthy now and waiting patiently for the day when your two souls reunite again.    and that will happen!

i know this is so very hard especially coming off from another loss so soon.    i know it feels as if God has tested us beyond our endurance but i suspect that He is giving us a lesson in love that is ever lasting.     you know that you will love your baby for ever and she you.    it is the imost important lesson that any of us can learn as love is the most important and powerful force in the universe.    it is eternal and never dies.

please come back here often and talk to all of us here.    we all understand how deep the loss goes and how much it feels like your world has been turned upside down.   folks here along with time can help you to right your world again.    when you are up to it, please tell us more about your baby and also post some pics as well.    show her off and we will gladly ooh and aww over her splendor that only our furbabies possess.

(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
WooWooWoo

Registered:
Posts: 5,100
 #4 
Dear Catmommy,  I am so very sorry to learn that your sweet, beloved Tabitha has passed on.  She sounds like such a special little furbaby with quite the purrsonality.  The two of you were/are so blessed to belong to each other.  It is so painful to lose a little one who has been so very close to your heart for so long, so my heart goes out to you.  I would love to hear more about Tabitha when you feel up to it as I am sure you have some wonderful stories.  I will be keeping you in my prayers. 

Godspeed, precious Tabitha!  Run with the angels and watch over your loving mommy from the Bridge.

Hugs,
Melissa
Mare

Registered:
Posts: 11,059
 #5 
I am so sorry your precious Tabitha passed away so suddenly.  Losing a beloved pet is very heart breaking.  It is sad that you lost a dear pet only a few months ago also.  Your heart is very burdened by theses losses and my heart goes out to you.  I only wish our pets lived as long as we did. 

Mare
precious Christoph ~ gone two years now ~

cat_mommy

Registered:
Posts: 2
 #6 
Thank you, everyone.  Although we've had to say good-bye to other fur-kids, this one has been difficult.  You see, when I picked Tabitha up yesterday, they had already put her in the little box and had wrapped it with tape (which led me to believe I shouldn't try to look at her).  I guess maybe they thought it best for me to remember her as she was on the trip to the vet's - top lid opened on the carrier, sitting up, looking out and taking in the scenery.  But I remember the last time I saw her alive was when the tech came and picked her up to take her to the back for the surgery.  I patted her nose and told her to be a good girl.

And now I'm feeling so guilty.  Was she in pain?  Did she die in her sleep?  Did she think I had abandoned her?  I feel like I haven't had closure.  I found some video I had taken of her a few months ago.  I'm so glad I have the video, but it hurts so much to look at it.  I know my emotions are raw right now, but I just want to be where I can hold her again.  No, I'm not going to do anything drastic.  I have a mother and other fur-kids who need me. 

I'm so glad I have a heart for these four-legged sweethearts, but I'm so tired of having my heart ripped out.  I just lit a candle for Tabitha and for all of the others who greeted her at the Bridge.  Again, thank all of you for caring.  And I pray that your grief becomes easier to bear, too.
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