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Charliemom

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Posts: 7
 #1 
Oh my heart aches today. The vet called and said Charlie was ready to be picked up. It sounded just like he was there for an appointment, and I was able to kid myself I was in some alternate reality where he would be waiting for me. Instead it was a punch to my heart and I picked up his ashes in a beautiful urn my husband chose. I was blessed with a paw print and tuft of fur they saved for us. It meant so much. I keep running my hand over the print. How do you move on? How do any of the days become okay? This loss is just soul crushing and I deeply miss my dear Charlie Dog. My husband keeps trying to cheer me up, bless him, but he doesn't realize his gifts are just realted now to the pain in my heart. Today, he helped me heal a bit and started a memorial fund to the shelter that saved Charlie's life as a puppy and made me his puppy mom in hopes it will help someone else find their own Charlie Dog.

Bless you all for this group and support. It really helps making these posts.
ladylazarus

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Posts: 5
 #2 
I really feel for you. I lost my sweet girl yesterday and feel just the same as you about her about the ashes. I can tell you loved him very much and that you gave him a loving and happy life.

One thing that is helping me a very little is to know that all things, all energy in life change substance, but never truly lost. This is a a scientific truth, so applies to any belief system....your sweetie has changed form and is no longer trapped with suffering, and they would love to know you cherish them even in their changed form. Pets love their owners so I think your love would be so happy to know they remain safe in your home with you


I am sorry if this is not very helpful, I just wanted you to know that you are not alone and people care.
Charliemom

Registered:
Posts: 7
 #3 
Ladylazarus,

Thank you for your reply. It does help. I am so sorry about your loss too. Just knowing there are others who understand has been so helpful to me. Every day is a little bit better as we adjust to the new normal. Hugs to you and prayers for healing.
LynneaS

Registered:
Posts: 2
 #4 
LadyLazarus thank you for that reply. We unexpectedly lost our 10-week old Peke puppy and I am so devastated. I can’t stop crying. Your message is in line with my beliefs and I thank you for reminding me.
ladylazarus

Registered:
Posts: 5
 #5 
I am so sorry to hear of your loss. I found this article very comforting, both at a secular and a religious level.

"The following, written by NPR commentator Aaron Freeman, is a gem!

You want a physicist to speak at your funeral. You want the physicist to talk to your grieving family about the conservation of energy, so they will understand that your energy has not died. You want the physicist to remind your sobbing mother about the first law of thermodynamics; that no energy gets created in the universe, and none is destroyed. You want your mother to know that all your energy, every vibration, every Btu of heat, every wave of every particle that was her beloved child remains with her in this world. You want the physicist to tell your weeping father that amid energies of the cosmos, you gave as good as you got.

And at one point you'd hope that the physicist would step down from the pulpit and walk to your brokenhearted spouse there in the pew and tell him/her that all the photons that ever bounced off your face, all the particles whose paths were interrupted by your smile, by the touch of your hair, hundreds of trillions of particles, have raced off like children, their ways forever changed by you. And as your widow rocks in the arms of a loving family, may the physicist let him/her know that all the photons that bounced from you were gathered in the particle detectors that are her/his eyes, that those photons created within her/him constellations of electromagnetically charged neurons whose energy will go on forever.

And the physicist will remind the congregation of how much of all our energy is given off as heat. There may be a few fanning themselves with their programs as he says it. And he will tell them that the warmth that flowed through you in life is still here, still part of all that we are, even as we who mourn continue the heat of our own lives.

And you'll want the physicist to explain to those who loved you that they need not have faith; indeed, they should not have faith. Let them know that they can measure, that scientists have measured precisely the conservation of energy and found it accurate, verifiable and consistent across space and time. You can hope your family will examine the evidence and satisfy themselves that the science is sound and that they'll be comforted to know your energy's still around. According to the law of the conservation of energy, not a bit of you is gone; you're just less orderly."
LynneaS

Registered:
Posts: 2
 #6 
Thank you so much! 🙏
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