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twinkiesmom

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Posts: 839
 #41 
I am so sorry for your suffering. It is a difficult situation to be in and heartbreaking trying to decide what is right. All of us here are obviously good pet parents who love them deeply. We know how hard it is to lose a loved one who is physically ill but there are no signs of that in your situation. Just as people can be mentally ill so can animals. There are homes for people with severe mental problems to keep them safe from hurting themselves or other people. Sadly that is not the same with an animal.

I have personally gone through two situations where a dog attacked a human with no provocation, once I was the victim and the second it was my grandmother. Both attacks were not strange vicious dogs but family dogs who had been loved and cared for. Both these dogs went from zero to sixty within seconds and though our injuries were not life threatening they could have been. Both were euthanized on the recommendations of veteranarians.

I was an abused wife and I endured horrible physical and emotional pain before finally getting a divorce. After going through that misery I could not allow my family to have to worry daily that our dog could turn on them again so euthanization was the only answer for me. I know the two situations are miles apart but I think you know what I mean. I pray that you will be able to make the decision that is best for you and your family. Please take care, you will be in my thoughts and prayers.

Marsha
Endless_tears77

Registered:
Posts: 1
 #42 
Dear all, 

It is with great sadness and guilt that I made the heart breaking decision to put my beloved dog and friend, Boxy, to sleep for all eternity. I remained by his side until the end and beyond begging for his forgiveness. I love him dearly and he loved me too much with so much loyalty and trust. I betrayed him, his trust and his love. That decision was by far the most cruel and the most unfair decision I have ever made and it kills me inside.

Boxy and I met in a rescue center back in 2008. I was looking for a companion and he was waiting for a master. In this case it happened to be a mistress. Boxy was between 5-8 years old according to the vet. He had been starved by his previous master, hence his obsession with food.

We bonded so well that my now ex-partner became jealous of my relationship with Boxy. Eventually, they both accepted each other. Boxy was spoiled by the two of us. We took him on holidays, gave him extra treats. We both loved him so much, me in particular. 

Then, in 2011 I became pregnant and miscarried. It was a missed miscarriage. I found out the day of the scan, just like in the film, Marley and Me. Once in the car the devastation hit me. I cried and cried, and cried even more. When I got home,  Boxy realised that something had happened. He sat in front of me, and I will never forget the look in his eyes.  I knew he was sharing my pain quietly.  If he had been a human being, he would have cried with me.

Then, I became pregnant again, and gave birth to my daughter Victoria the same year. Initially, he did not pay attention to her. But, with this new addition the situation was no longer the same.  I still loved Boxy very much, but I no longer had the time I used to have for him. When Victoria was 7 months old, her father left us... he wanted to be 25 again. At that point, it was Victoria, Boxy and I. 

When Victoria started walking, I noticed Boxy did not want her to approach him. He would growl, pretend to bite her. She was not interested, she wanted the toy near him, or she was just passing by. He did not want her to approach him, and each time he was on the defensive I would send him somewhere else. Eventually, I showed him a corner where he could hide. After a while, the growling stopped, then came back and stopped again.

Victoria grew up, became more independent and took an interest in him. She would stroke him, smack him, or sit on his back while he was on his bed, and he did not like it. He did not want to be annoyed when he was on his bed. He bit her. He bit her a first time and a second time. So, we visited the vet to discuss the situation. Then, a month later he bit her again and left bruises on her knee. He bit her because he wanted peace and quiet when he was on his bed. He was about 16 years old. I did warn Victoria repeatedly and told her off, but she did not seem to understand. She would remove his muzzle and wind him up. Not once he charged her. Not once he bit her savagely. But, it was escalating and it worried me. After I made this horrible decision, I noticed his behaviour changed slightly. He never went upstairs, but his last two nights he came up to sleep by my bed, and he stayed closer to me as if he knew. I decided to end his life and he showed me more love and attention. He was spending as much time as possible with me. Sadly, it is the victim who paid the price with his life. He just wanted a bit of peace and quiet and I killed him to protect the one who was pestering him. 


I hope he is waiting for me on the other side and that one day we'll meet again. I love him so much.

A.





PunkinMummy

Registered:
Posts: 1,038
 #43 
Dear A,

I am so sorry for the loss your beloved Boxy. There is no good way to lose those we love but being forced to put to sleep an aggressive animal has to be one of the hardest. Your words "That decision was by far the most cruel and the most unfair decision I have ever made and it kills me inside" make my heart ache for you. I know these will just be words right now when your loss is so new and raw but please be gentle with yourself. I don't know anything about aggressive dogs but I know you love Boxy and made the only decision you felt you could make. You said you betrayed his trust and love but you didn't. Imagine if Victoria had innocently provoked him to the point of aggression and he had hurt her seriously. How would you feel then? You might never have been able to forgive him. This way you freed him from what was troubling him.

I do believe like so many of the people here that Boxy is waiting for you on the other side of this world in a wide, wide Heaven. Where he lives now he is healthy and happy and no longer troubled with aggression or any other of the burdens of this physical world. I also believe he has Perfect Knowledge now and understands how much you love him and he waits for you someday when it is your time.

I hope you don't mind if I suggest you post this as a separate topic as you might get more replies from people who have more wisdom than I do. So many of the people posting along this thread are no longer actively posting here. To post a separate topic if you look on the first page of the grief forum along the top right it says "New Topic". You click on that, enter your choice of a heading and then do your post and and "Add Reply". And make sure you tick the box at the left bottom which says "Subscribe to this topic" so you get notification of replies when they are written.

I am so sorry for the terrible pain you are feeling and for the loss of your beloved Boxy. Please come back and share more about Boxy and his picture when you can. Together we will get through this terrible grief. Keeping you in my thoughts in these difficult days.

With deepest sympathy,

Colleen
SooBet

Registered:
Posts: 14
 #44 
I don't feel like I am ever going to get over the decision we inevitably had to make. My head and my heart are constantly at war.
My beautiful little grand beagle was 99% of the time a little love. 1% brought out the demons.
I know exactly how you feel ..... broken :(
ILoveYouBitty

Registered:
Posts: 119
 #45 
I feel terrible that you have to go through this.  Try to lean on the members of this message board.  I don't know where I'd be without them.
Couri

Registered:
Posts: 1
 #46 
I am so glad I found this today I have to take my boy Magnar to put him down after fighting for him for a year and a half he is only two and was a rescue my sister found him starved and beat on the side of the road and brought him to me I fell in love and had taken in quite a few rescues. We got him strong and healthy again fixed , he had food aggression which we learned when he bit my daughters chihuahua so we changed how everyone ate. One day somehow one of the springers hood chew toys got in the living room and he attacked my bug over it no severe wounds, then he started growling at my nieces and nephews who are just little so we would lock him when they were around and now he attacked my bug again over nothing this time and completely messed up his eye And snout bit right through his nose to the bottom of his mouth he spent the night in the emergency room and is going to be ok but will never be the same! I am beyond grief and feel like the worst person ever I love magnar he is my best friend we would walk through the woods he slept with me every night I took him from almost death to a beautiful healthy boy just to have to kill him my self and I am so heartbroken and was looking for something to let me know I wasn’t alone and it’s all of you thank you so much!
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