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Benniesmom

Registered:
Posts: 95
 #1 
To all the kind souls here,

My baby boy has been having some good days. He seems to have responded to the chemo med. He is eating, playing, and sleeping. Thank you God. Though I know that it is temporary, I am loving him every minute of every day.

Today the vet called about a new chemo drug, but it costs $450 and the treatment will be every 2 weeks. We just can't afford it, so we have made the decision to just continue with the current treatment and pray that it will continue to work for however long God intends.

My heart still aches so very deeply. I am profoundly sad. I am trying to get out of this deep hole, but the thought of losing him eventually is taking its toll. The thought of having to have him put to sleep is simply misery at its best. This has got to be the 2nd worst year of my life; the year my beautiful mom died being the first.  Some days all I do is cry and sleep. Today wasn't so bad because he had a good day and his eyes are bright.

Like you all here, I just love my baby.

Thanks all for listening and responding. It really helps.

WooWooWoo

Registered:
Posts: 5,100
 #2 
Dear Bennie's Mom,

Oh, I am so very sorry your beloved Benny is so ill.   I will say many prayers for the two of you and ask that you and he be given the strength to fight this dreadful disease.  Just remember, take it one day at a time.   Love on him, spoil him, give him his favorite foods, and take photos.  And, keep us posted on how the two of you are doing.

Sending prayers and hugs,
Melissa
Betsy's forever mom
Gruntsmomforever

Registered:
Posts: 699
 #3 
Dear Benniesmom Maria,

I'm so glad your little boy has had a good day today, and it's always heartwarming to see that bright little sparkle in the eyes.

My heart aches for you because I know what you're going through, many of us do.  The decisions that we have to make are gutwrenching and so agonizing.  I felt (and still do feel) so helpless and angry that it was up to my husband and me to determine the life and death of our Beloved Grunt, my baby, my everything.  But we committed to loving him, taking care of him, and doing the best we could for his sake - we took on this responsibility when he came into our family.  In our case, there was surgery or aggressive drug treatment that would only extend his suffering, so we had no choice but to let him go.  I know the profound sadness and pain you are feeling.  And how it feels trying to hold on to and cherish every good day and good moment that is left for you and your darling Bennie.  It helped me to just focus on the moment at hand, to fully enjoy my baby boy at that moment, because that's what he was doing.  It really helped, and I hope it will help you.  They are pure love, pure joy and that's what they want us to share with them.

Thinking of you and your baby Bennie, and keeping you both in my prayers,
Katharine, Grunt's Mom Forever 

dogrispamela

Registered:
Posts: 558
 #4 
Bennie's Mom,

I'm so glad that your Bennie responded to the chemo and had a good day today.  I very much understand your heavy heart and sadness at what the future holds.  It's very difficult to watch them go down hill and know that your beloved Bennie's time with you is short.  Sometimes it does not feel fair that their perfect souls only last such a short time.  I'll keep you and Bennie in my prayers that he defies the odds and has more time with you.  Huge hugs, Golda's Mom
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