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Coops_mom

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Posts: 7
 #1 
Cooper was the dog I didn't pick out. Although he was not the breed I wanted, he was everything I needed. I wanted the white fluffy girl dog I could carry around. Instead I got a shedding, slobbering tri colored Bassett. I got the most gentle, loving, funny and handsome boy ever. This boy had been right by my side in some of my most difficult situations I had ever faced. I always discribed him as a cartoon character. His exspresions were so animated. He made me laugh daily, He snuggled daily and most of all he was with me daily. He was such apart of my life. If you know me for even just a quick conversation, you knew about coop. I know I probably should say more about that past few days, but I can't even bring myself to that... a year ago he started having seizures. I made many trips to the vet and got any and all recommended meds. They started coming closer and closer. Last saterday night he started barking, he wasnt a barker! I knew something was really wrong. He lost his sight completely. It took me 4 hours to settle him down and get him to sleep. When he woke up, his eyes looked like the rolled back in his head. It was Christmas eve and we didn't want to leave him. My husband stayed home and I dropped off gift to my family. When I got home it looked like one eye was coming back down. We snuggled him in like we did every night, Christmas morning his site was back. He was great all day!
Then it happens again late that night. The next morning his eyes didn't come back. I brought him to the vet that afternoon..he spent the day snoozing on my bed and I made sure to be quiet and let him rest. When we got to the vet,,, his eyes came back down. I though I was going to get eyedrops and told he might go blind permanently. It didn't matter what ever we had to do to keep him comfortable we would do. He had been walking in circles for. A few weeks and more so the last week. I thought it might have been anxiety or he was board. Then I got to news you never are ready to hear. It was neurological and was going to get much worse fast. There were no more med to give him, nothing to fix it.... I wrapped my arms around him as he layed on a table. It all happens so fast. I wasn't ready.... I keep thinking i should of just brought him home..cryed like I never have before holding my coop. I haven't stopped crying, I cant. My heart is just broken. Theres no fixing this. How can it get better? The only thing would be for him to come back and we all know that is not posibal.. I should of spent the day snuggled up with him. Not tip toeing around the house doing things. I had no Idea that was going to be my last day with him. I'm so hurt.... I just want him to come home and don't know how to move on. I'm just broken! Sorry this was so long. I just don't know what to do💔
Remsmom

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Posts: 10
 #2 
I had a similar situation of ups and downs with my boy and lost him so fast. I was ready it’s been 3 days now and I haven’t stopped crying. Your feelings are justified and I’m sure your boy knows how much you love and miss him and that If love Alone would keep him alive he would have lived forever. Putting a dog down is traumatizing I hope you can find peace.
Mpaull

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Posts: 1
 #3 
Hi!  I just lost the love of my life yesterday.  His name is Auggie and he was a beautiful short hair doxie.   For the last ten years I have had him with me everyday and he got me through all of the hard times along with being there for all of the happy times.  I've had to put down four dogs in my life and with each loss, I know how devastating and deep this grief consumes you.  Auggie was my lifeline and I would actually joke sometimes if Auggie had to go, so must I because life couldn't possibly exist without him.  Here I am, day one, without him.  Auggie passed around 3:00 PM yesterday.  It feels so strange that the world is able to function and people around you are able to function but I feel like I can't even move.  It is the most perfect love and what you would give to just have them back for another minute.  Auggie was diagnosed with SARDS in August.  His blindness was acute and he seemed to be coping but for the last month he was falling quite a bit and unable to navigate, without being carried everywhere, within his everyday areas.  I was prepared to carry him everywhere but it was clearly taking a toll on him.  He was so disoriented.  His back knee was injured in a fall and he was so nervous and crying unless he was laying in a safe place right next to me.  He stopped going for walks and his quality of life wasn't much.  I promised him I wouldn't ever let him suffer or lack the dignity in his life he so deserved.  At what point am I being selfish to just have him with me?  These decisions are devastating...I found the strength yesterday and I know it was the right thing to do but the loss is unbearable.  Thank you for listening and understanding this kind of loss.
sunspark

Registered:
Posts: 21
 #4 
Hi Mpaull,

just a quick note here, maybe this belongs in another thread, but I wanted to say to you, and everyone else, who has had to make that decision about their dog's life -- I have had to do that previously with 3 other dogs, but with my current loss of Peety - I did not get that luxury.

Peety died due to complications of the vet putting a feeding tube down him, it made him vomit (along with opiates that were given) and I got the records afterwards, he was apparently vomiting and choking for at least 2 or 3 hours after the procedure. He was in the vet ICU - we  did not know what was happening, we were home waiting for the evening visiting time. He was so weak, he finally just quit breathing right before we got back out there. 

So my sweet Peety, who had to be right next to us every second of every day, preferably touching one of us, he died alone at the vet hospital choking because of a procedure they did. He died alone on that cold metal exam table, I am sure his last 2 hours were absolutely miserable. 

I feel so bad, it just destroys me when I think about what he went through, esp I am sure he wondered why he was stuck in that place without us (for 3 long days -- even though we visited twice a day, he was alone the rest of the time with people who did not love him) he was a very sensitive dog -- and then this happened. 

It's terrible any way it happens, but I think I would prefer he had gone peacefully with us there. I know I would prefer that.

Tanker_1

Registered:
Posts: 67
 #5 
Oh God, Coop's mom. I am so sorry. So sorry you had to make the choice so suddenly and in public. Nothing but ((hugs)).

I kept all of my dog's things except for her old lady items. Now anytime I need too I can throw a sheet over her bed and snuggle on it and watch tv. Some people do get rid of all their friend's things, but I wanted to keep them. Just a thought. 
Coops_mom

Registered:
Posts: 7
 #6 
I deeply appreciate EVERY single note. My prayers are with you all. It is such an overwhelming feeling of sadness. I hope we all find peace in our hearts and homes. Still just woohoo sad
Sharon_C1

Registered:
Posts: 8
 #7 
I am also struggling with the loss of my dog.  Your story made me cry again, but, your first line about wanting a fluffy white girl dog but ending up with a slobbering goofball made me laugh out loud and cry for dogs again.  Much love to you, what a terrible, terrible thing to go through.  You did your best.  
Always__there

Registered:
Posts: 123
 #8 
Hello COOP>    I feel for You and the intense misery that You and I both feel about our dearly departed. Saying goodbye? There is NEVER enough time !! I would have given up a finger or two, anything to buy my wee man another 5 years, but, was not meant to be. Our pet's DO touch our Souls and that is a GOOD thing, in that it is a reminder that they are ALWAYS with us in SPIRIT.
The intensity of our feelings aftermath comes in waves as the pain is still very raw. So, know that your beloved knew YOU TRULY LOVED HIM. Look at it from that perspective. DO light your candles and have the photos around the candle and yes, cradle his favourite toy. We all handle grief on different levels. I, am trying my best to hold it together after 17d. Still very*** painful. Do what makes you able to COPE better on a daily basis. My suggestion also is to have daily outings in the fresh air and not** to hang about the house. Engage in TV/RADIO for additional stimuli. MY BEST TO YOU. PEACE, SHERRYxxPERRYXX
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