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Becky57

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Posts: 657
 #1 

I am ashamed to say this but in my worst nightmare which started on a Thursday and ended with my dog's death onMon. morning, I never once, not even once did I believe she coud or would die.  I listened to the vet say things like bleeding internally, immune disease, and still I wasn't worrying. Even when he said, we better hope it isn't immune, I just stood there and agreed. When he did her second blood count, and it was down drasticaly, I never thought she wuld die.When I took her home after he gave her medicine, and she threw up, I didn't think she wuld die.  When I took her back and he  pushed her in my arms and said you have to get to the university fast--now leave! I wasn't worried--just glad I had my credit card on me.  I never believed the thing I feared most in this world could happen.  I had told my sister-in-law only a few weeks before, that I would have to kill myself if something ever happened to my dog.  I remember double checking with my brother and sister-in-law that they would take her as a house dog if something happened to me.  What was I thinking.

rena

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Posts: 174
 #2 
Dear Becky,

  It all seems so unreal doesn't it.  We love them so much we can't even conceive of them as seriously ill and especially of dying and not being with us anymore.  The shock of having a loved baby here one minute and gone the next is undescribable.  You are in shock and disbelief and slowly the horror of never seeing them again starts the guilt and sorrow that goes on and on.  Keep sharing, we are all with you and know how horrible the guilt and sadness is. 

Love,
Rena
fab1835

Registered:
Posts: 104
 #3 
 Dear Becky,

   I know exactly how you feel. Feb.9, the day that Jingles, our Yorkie died was a day I never thought would come so soon. Everything was fine that morning until Jingles sneezed twice, which caused his little trachea to totally collapse. When I asked the vet if he was going to die from this he said no. After 2 vet visits and 4 hours later he was gone. When he died I started screaming at my husband to give him mouth to mouth, but we didn't know how and we ran back to the vet again. I was holding Jingles in my arms hoping against hope he could still be saved. The vet was closed, but my husband started banging on the side door and the technicians were still there and they opened the door. They took Jingles in and examined him. They said there was nothing they could do.It was so final. But vets aren't God and we are only human and we miss our furbabies like crazy.Try to start thinking of the good times you had with Bailey. I made a scrapbook of Jingles and it helped. I will keep you in my prayers. Jingles mom
EmptyNow

Registered:
Posts: 199
 #4 
Becky - I am so sorry honey.  You just didn't think it would happen - it's normal for us to think that a tragedy like this can't happen to our babies.

It's not your fault though. Please know that.

Big Hug,

Piggy's Mom
choochoo

Registered:
Posts: 115
 #5 

Becky Sometimes very bad things happen and we cant control them even if we think we could have.You cannot blame yourself for the loss of your dog.You never expect them to die especially so quickly.You cant always see when bad things will happen.I also didnt notice my dog was walking slowly i thought just more arthritis but she also had that horrible immune disease your dog probably had.We put her to sleep as she had other ailments and didnt have much of chance to survive.That immune disease if your girl had it has a high mortality rate so even if you did everything right there was no guarantee should would have recovered.also many have relapses so please dont blame yourself as no one can say what would have happened.Just know you loved your girl and sometimes we cannot change when bad things happen to our beloved.I miss my girl so much as you do also but there is no one to blame.sometimes we just control everything even though we think we can.I hope you can release at least some of the pain.My prayers to you

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